Grey
by treneka
Summary: A few musings on the eternal rivals' ordinary lives. I'm just exploring cliches. Edited warnings: This story may contain many things, but although it's not about romance, there is some and though it wasn't meant to have a plot, it occasionally does.
1. Too Far Ahead

Disclaimer: I hold no rights to Hikaru no Go, its characters or stories.

a/n: I just felt like exploring some cliches in the follow up story of the eternal rivals.

_--- _

_Though the moves be black and white, the story formed is grey. _

---

Part 1. Too Far Ahead

"Should I even bother pointing out your mistakes?" The achromatic massacre charted on the goban was unusually severe. "If you weren't serious, you should have told me. I don't like wasting my time." Ordinarily, such a statement would have brought immediate rebuttal, bristling annoyance or at the very least a rapid (and much improved) rematch. Today, however, Shindou sat back in his chair and ran a hand through his slightly over-grown hair, staring bemusedly at the stones.

"You're right. I wasn't concentrating." He began clearing the stones from the board, swiftly and with an economy of movement that was testament to their years of playing.

"You weren't concentrating?!" Touya felt his cheeks flush with a hint of indignation and noted the spark of familiar annoyance kindle in his rival's eyes.

"I was preoccupied." His tone was still calm, but there was an edge to it.

"Since when do you become preoccupied in the middle of a game? You're often too laid back, but giving me less than your best... that's not like you. Unacceptable." Touya quickly began sweeping black stones into their coffer.

"Sorry I don't schedule my life around your ego, but I've kinda got other things on my mind right now!" He finished clearing the last of his stones and slammed the lid shut with a rattle, preparing to stand and storm away. This wasn't the first time it had happened – indeed the first year they'd played here, it had been the ordinary course of events. Still, such displays had become few and far between in the past five years, with the last one over six months ago.

"Wait, Shindou. What's bothering you?" He allowed a trace of genuine concern to permeate his words, and noted its effect with satisfaction. Across from him, Shindou's shoulder's slumped a little and he stared at the goban. Touya waited patiently.

"Akari's pregnant." His words were almost too soft to hear, but Touya caught them and smiled at his rival's discomfiture.

"Your mother will be happy." He managed to keep his own amusement from showing. It wasn't as though such a turn of events was unexpected. Akari and Shindou had been married for over a year now, and while Hikaru's schedule did keep him on the road a lot, it didn't keep him away from home _that_ much.

"She's thrilled." Shindou looked about ready to break something. Touya pointedly placed a single black stone on the goban, and watched as habit took over and his rival set a small handful of white stones across from it. The guess was correct, and Touya made the first move. "I'm still preoccupied, you know." Shindou muttered darkly, while making a perfectly acceptable counter.

"You'll play better, this time." Touya continued with their almost ritualized opening sequence. "And Akari? Is she well?"

"Yeah. She's fine." pa-chin. "She's already thinking up names."

"And you?" Four more moves went by in silence.

"I don't know," he said finally. "I mean, how am I supposed to know how to be a parent? I'm only twenty-one years old, for crying out loud. I don't know how to raise kids." He drew his fan from his pocket and opened and closed it in what had become a recognizable gesture of nerves. "I never even had little brothers or sisters. I'm not that smart. I'm sure as hell not rich. Akari works full time," open, close, "My schedule's getting busier every year. When are we even going to have _time_ to be parents?" He placed a stone in a seemingly weak central location, and Touya peered thoughtfully at the board.

"You're thinking too far ahead," he murmured, setting his reply on an overlooked position in the corner. Shindou noted the choice as well as the words, and scrutinized the patterns of their game. Touya could almost see him running projections in his mind, and smiled. Finally, his rival made a move, to which he replied almost immediately. pa-chin. pa-chin. The game progressed with greater intensity as both players focused on their moves. Shindou's were slightly more cautious than usual, but with an elegance that almost made up for it. As the game replaced his worries, he resumed the brilliant confidence and inspirational excellence which Touya had come to expect.

They waged a lovely war for the next hour and a half, neither speaking much. Finally, Touya was forced to resign. It both rankled and satisfied him. At least Shindou had gotten into the game. They exchanged thank you's and looked over the goban.

"I don't see it," commented Shindou, looking at one of his earlier moves. "Why did you say I was looking too far ahead?" In point of fact, that play had worked out rather nicely for him.

"I wasn't talking about the game," replied Touya, his voice overly casual to obscure his irritation at losing, and at Shindou's automatic assumption that his mind could only encompass matters of black and white. Still, in Shindou's life, Touya was nothing more or less than his rival. On the board, they were closer than lovers. Off of it, however, Shindou seemed to forget at times that his rival also considered him a friend. Their relationship was not easy, but then, struggles had always been very motivating to both.

They began cleaning up the stones, and Touya decided to explain himself. "What works on a goban may not always work in life. Sometimes you have to focus on the play at hand, and not worry too much about the future." He stood and stretched, Shindou doing likewise. "Anyway, there are ways to balance parenting and go. You can always talk to my father. He managed pretty well."

"Oh, and have my kid wind up like you? I don't think so." But Shindou was grinning. "I'd better get home. Akari was saying something about painting. God knows what colors she'll pick." They walked to the front counter of the go parlor, and Shindou retrieved his backpack from the attendant. "Thanks for the game, Touya."

"Any time, Shindou."


	2. Interesting Strategy

a/n: Okay, I admit it, this is pretty much just drivel written to help me get over writer's block I'm experiencing with something else, but c'est la vie. It's fun.

Part 2: Interesting Strategy

The crowd was beginning to break up. Those reporters who'd been present had long since finished their interviews and run off to submit their stories. Fans and well-wishers had for the most part been dealt with, and the officials for the match had said their farewells. The two stars of the evening had somehow wound up in the elevator alone together. It hadn't been entirely intentional, but then again, it hadn't been completely unplanned either.

"You played well tonight," commented Touya, knowing as he said it that Shindou was probably only thinking of the various mistakes he'd made and opportunities he'd lost. Even so, it had been one of their better matches. The spectators had been impressed, and even the less knowledgeable members of the crowd had appreciated the energy and intensity of the opponents. "I was wondering, though, what was so funny during the opening?"

"Huh?" Shindou seemed momentarily floored, and Touya knew he'd been reviewing his attack on the lower right.

"You nearly laughed every time I placed a stone for the first seven hands." Something clicked, and Shindou's mouth curled into a grin, even as his eyes became reflective.

"Kinume."

"Your daughter?" It was Touya's turn to be confused. "I didn't notice her in the crowd. Was she here?" The elevator reached the lobby, and they exited, heading for the taxis out front. By unspoken agreement, they shared a cab, and Shindou instructed the driver to take them back to their hotel. He leaned back in his seat, with a smile on his lips and amusement in his eyes.

"She's at home with Akari. They had a big night last night, though. It seems they spent it in the emergency room." He was nearly laughing.

"And that's funny how?"

"It seems Kinume has taken an interest in go." Now he _was_ laughing and Touya was beginning to get irritated. Shindou could be so cryptic sometimes, considering what an open person he was generally. He seemed to notice his friend's annoyance, however, and clarified. "She woke Akari last night, saying she had a tummy ache. Akari tried the usual stuff, but I guess the kid was really hurting so she finally took her to the ER. Turns out it's my fault. You remember that match I had against Kurata two weeks ago?"

Touya nodded. It had been another excellent game, but Shindou had been perturbed by some aspects of it and had been going over it ever since. Touya well understood that particular compulsion.

"I set it up on my board at home, and I guess I forgot to put the stones away when I left. I was kinda in a hurry, you know?" he put his forehead in his hand and smirked, ruefully. His rival suppressed a shocked premonition of what had happened. Shindou continued. "I guess Kinume went in and decided to swallow twenty-four of the stones. It's a miracle she didn't choke. They gave her some stuff at the hospital to help... er... get rid of them, and they said she's going to be fine, but Akari gave me hell for it anyway." He gave an apologetic grin to his rival. "I just couldn't stop imagining her picking up those stones. It must have been adorable."

Touya smiled in the darkness of the cab. It was the sort of impulsive, single-minded thing one might expect from a daughter of his rival. "So Shindou, what color did she choose?"

"Black. Every one of them." He seemed slightly nonplussed by the question, until his rival caught his eye. Understanding bloomed as perspective shifted and the joke was complete. Shindou laughed quietly at the city lights beyond the glass.

"Interesting strategy." Touya murmured.


	3. Imaginary Friend

a/n: My grandfather died today, so the drivel continues on a somewhat darker note. Also, _Ka-san_ means mother and _Tou-san_, father.

Part 3: Imaginary Friend

"Do you play checkers?" The seven-year-old and the twenty-eight-year-old regarded each other across the kitchen counter. They were waiting for the kettle to boil, one with barely controlled antsy-ness, the other with the bone-weariness of a man unused to children who had nevertheless found himself babysitting since seven o'clock that morning. Kinume's energy had yet to flag, but the promise of hot chocolate had her sitting still for the first time in four hours. Her mention of a board game brought him a glimmer of hope. Might he be able to get her to sit still for an hour or two of play?

"I have played checkers. Did you bring a board with you?" She shook her head and his hope diminished.

"We could play with yours, though." She was viewing him with the kind of patience one uses when dealing with a person of limited intelligence. He was unsure whether to feel offended or amused, but truly, his mind was too exhausted to decide.

"I'm afraid I don't have a checkers board."

"How about chess?" Her eyes flashed with eagerness.

"That requires the same type of board." He glanced up, in surprise. "You play chess?"

"Not here, I guess." They both watched the kettle as it refused to boil. "I'm pretty good at battleship," she offered. Seeing the look on his face, she continued quickly, "or Old Maid, or Backgammon?" He shook his head, and wondered whether he was up to the challenge of taking the girl to the local shopping center to buy a game. Remembering that morning's game of tag, he doubted it. "Do you wanna play hide-and-seek again?"

"No!" he said, a little too quickly, immediately feeling embarrassed at his outburst, and the hurt look on the child's face. He noticed steam starting to wisp from the kettle's spout, and checked again to make sure he'd put the instant cocoa into the mug. Shindou had warned him something about Kinume and sugar, but Shindou was not here and Kinume loved chocolate. If she were up all night, that was hardly Touya's problem. Her regular babysitter would be back from her outing at six o'clock. It was a little odd that Shindou had requested his assistance last night when Akari had gone into labor unexpectedly, but he didn't truly mind his rival's daughter. She was simply wearing him out.

The water was boiling, and he poured it over flavored powder in the mug. He raised a spoon to stir it, but the child reached across the counter with an unmistakable aura of I-can-do-it-myself, and he relinquished mug and spoon to her. He filled a second mug with water and dropped in a tea bag, watching the pale celedon of the mug disappear beneath the darker green of the tea.

"Touya-san?" Apparently, the cocoa was too hot, and she was stirring it patiently.

"Yes?"

"_Ka-san_ says you and _Tou-san_ play lots of games together. Could we play one of those?" She ducked her head immediately to try another sip of cocoa, swallowed too much, choked, gasped, fanned her mouth and finally went back to stirring as though nothing had happened. The go professional was acutely reminded of the number of games Shindou had missed or been late to due to accidents involving his daughter, but she seemed okay this time.

"Do you play Go?" It wouldn't surprise him. After all, his father had begun teaching him when he was roughly the same age.

"_Ka-san_ won't let _Tou-san_ teach me," the girl admitted ruefully, "but you wouldn't have to tell her..." Her eyebrows quirked in obvious hope. It seemed a little strange that Akari would object to her daughter's learning Go. Then he considered how much of her life was likely influenced by her husband's love and pursuit of the game. There was a certain rationale to keeping at least one family member well removed from that arena, and he could almost sympathize, but the prospect of spending an hour or two sitting in front of a goban and not having to worry about what entertainments the child would require after lunch was simply too tempting to avoid.

"Very well. It will be our secret," he acquiesced, smiling conspiratorially.

---

pa-chin. pa-chin.

"Touya?" The game was progressing slowly. Shindou clearly had a lot on his mind, but just as clearly had been trying not to think about most of it. Akari had been back from the hospital for a week, but showed no signs of getting over her depression. Hikaru had taken over the majority of Kinume's care and the household chores, and between that and his work schedule this was the first chance he'd had to meet for their regular games. He didn't show any evidence of grief for the baby they'd lost, but then, this was probably his time to escape such things. He'd just finished his last move, and Touya was re-evaluating his attack on the center, when his rival spoke. "Did you show Kinume how to hold Go stones?" His voice sounded unusually neutral.

"Has she taken up the game?" Touya placed a counter that should give Shindou something to think about, while deftly avoiding the question.

"We played last night, after her mother went to bed." His friend's response was quick in coming, and for several hands, it was as though they were playing speed Go. Finally, he paused again, pondering his next move. When he finally placed it, Shindou spoke again. "She said she wanted me to feel better, and that her imaginary friend taught her a game I'd like." There was something wistful in the way he said it that made Touya look up. For a moment, they stared at each other, unshared secrets behind both pairs of eyes. Touya looked away first, returning his attention to the goban. Some mysteries were better left unexplained. He made his final play, and Shindou acknowledged it with a bow. "I resign."

"Was it a good game?" They both knew he wasn't talking about the one they'd just played.

"For a seven-year-old? I don't know." Shindou smiled. "But it did make me feel better."


	4. Pins and Needles

a/n: I couldn't help writing this. Thanks to Virgo for inspiration – I got to thinking quite a bit about exactly what the characters are doing as they're speaking. Hope you like the results.

Part 4: Pins and Needles

"You've been studying the Shusaku kifu again." The opening had seemed a little traditional, and these joseki were indicative. They were playing at Shindou's house this afternoon. Akari was working and Kinume was on some sort of club outing, so they had the place to themselves. The board was set up in the small room that served as a sort of office to the family. A desk with a monitor and keyboard situated atop it stood along one wall, beside a small, western-style table cluttered with school papers and reference books. The facing wall was bare to accommodate the goban and two cushions. Where other families might have adorned the space on the wall with a sumiie work or other traditional art, the Shindous had opted for vibrantly colorful abstracts in oil and collage. Anywhere else, the two large paintings would have seemed garish, but here they seemed perfectly in keeping with the sensibilities of their owners.

At the moment, one of those owners was staring absently at the right-hand painting. Shindou and Touya had been playing for almost six hours without a break, and it was clear that Hikaru's attention span was waning, dedication to the game notwithstanding. He'd long since given up on formal seating, and was instead slouched with one leg twisted under the other and one knee up, supporting his wrist, which in turn supported his head. The 1.5 liter water bottle by his foot was almost empty. The seat cushion was squashed and turned askew of its original alignment with the board. Shindou was a formidable go player, but he'd never managed to truly look the part.

Across from him, Touya was the epitome of good form, for all that he wore jeans and an oxford shirt instead of a suit. The last time he'd worn a suit for one of their practice sessions, Shindou had harassed him so mercilessly that he'd promised not to do it again. Even so, sweat pants and a T-shirt were, in Touya's opinion, a little too casual for a respected professional, so jeans and a button down all the concession to "normal" that Shindou would be getting. Of course, jeans weren't really the most comfortable attire in which to kneel for extended periods. Touya was beginning to understand his father's fondness for traditional attire.

"Huh?" Shindou looked back from the painting to the game, returning to the "present" as he did.

"Those old Shusaku games. You've been studying them again recently, haven't you?" Touya looked up from the board, and watched a chagrined smile cross his opponent's face.

"Maybe." His grin widened and Touya snorted, shaking his head.

"Well, it is May, I suppose." At that, the smile disappeared from Shindou's face as something akin to shock suffused his expression. Touya almost laughed at how easy his opponent could be to read. It was curious how touchy the man got about the month of May, though.

"What's that supposed to mean?" The propped knee hit the floor, and Shindou leaned almost threateningly over the board. Touya was a little surprised, but Shindou's tone and posture were becoming annoying. The dark-haired player brought himself into a more proper posture, looking down his nose at his rival.

"Your play always becomes a little old-fashioned in May. You've been doing it for years. Did you think I wouldn't notice?"

"Are you saying I'm _predictable_?!" Shindou's eyebrows had disappeared beneath his bangs.

"Are you saying you're not?" Touya knew he was goading his friend. He knew it was childish. Some part of his mind even knew it was patently untrue; Shindou's unexpected moves on the goban were one of his greatest strengths and the thing that made playing him a constant fascination. Even so, some patterns of their relationship remained firmly entrenched in twelve-year-old thinking, and fighting when they'd spent too long playing without a pause was one of them.

"If you know everything about me, why don't you finish this game by yourself?" Shindou shouted, shoving his go ke at his opponent.

"Well your next three moves were pretty obvious," Touya snarled. A detached portion of his mind was slightly disgusted that a thirty-year-old professional could still be provoked this way. That part was not in control at the moment. As his rival watched in disbelief and barely restrained fury, he calmly played the next three hands alone. Shindou's darkening face told him plainer than words that he'd guessed correctly. What he did not anticipate was Shindou lunging across the board to shove him over backwards.

"You arrogant prick!" Stones scattered, and Shindou stumbled backward to his feet. "You were the one who wanted me to help you practice!" he yelled, snatching his water bottle from the floor and turning away as he fumbled angrily with the cap. It didn't seem to be cooperating, and he finally threw it across the room to bounce harmlessly against his daughter's dictionaries. "_You_ came to _me_, but if you really think you're so damn smart then why did you lose the Kisei title to me last month, huh?!" He refocused his gaze on Touya, only to discover that his rival was still lying on the ground, clutching his still-bent knees and sporting an agonized grimace. Anger left him like air from a punctured balloon, and he was immediately kneeling at his friend's side. "Are you okay? Touya?" He reached a tentative hand to shake his rival's shoulder, but Touya shoved it aside.

"Pins and needles," he gasped weakly, as he carefully began an attempt to straighten his legs. Shindou's expression flowed from worry to barely stifled mirth, with the mercurial ease that had saved their friendship a thousand times. He sat back on his heels to enjoy the show. Touya glared at him around the excruciating sensation of feeling returning to somnolent limbs, but Shindou only gave in to laugh outright.

"Well, I bet you didn't see that coming," he taunted, grinning. Then he dragged the protesting Touya to his feet, and lead him painstakingly to the entryway. "Let's take a break and go get some lunch."

"Ramen?" Touya murmured, cautiously easing his left foot into a suddenly-uncomfortable penny-loafer. Shindou froze where he sat tying his sneakers, before turning to smile at the tottering young man.

"Good guess."


	5. We'll Play Again

a/n: A little serious again, but this is one of the more cliché stories out there, so I had to include a version of it.

Part 5: We'll Play Again

The house seemed extraordinarily empty today. His mother had finally finished packing the last of her personal belongings and left to live with her sister. The architecture which had always seemed pleasantly austere now looked cold and soulless. It was almost as if the very shoji sensed the finality of their owner's last departure.

Now what? In the kitchen, his mother had left a kettle and his father's favorite tea bowls. It was the set she'd often used to serve guests at his father's evening study sessions. Perhaps she couldn't bring herself to consider using them alone. He didn't know. Absently, Touya Akira selected his father's bowl from the set and holding it, went to stand in the main room overlooking the gardens and the snow.

Standing there, looking out, he felt as though the house were closing in, threatening to smother him in an atmosphere of isolation. He opened the window to let in the breeze and felt instantly better. The air grew cold. The sky grew dark. He sipped tea from the empty cup, and listened to the stillness of the evening. The occasional punctuation of the bamboo deer scare echoed louder as twilight gave way to night, and he felt as though his world had dissolved into the wind and the sound, and the empty cup. White snow and black sky became stones on the board of a game thirty-two years long. _Father..._

The doorbell rang. Its incongruous chime pierced the growing sadness and Touya was abruptly aware of how dark it had become and how cold the room was. Setting the cup on the kitchen counter as he passed, the man made his way to the door. It was Shindou.

"Jeez, Touya! It's almost as cold in here as it is out there. Did they shut off the heat?" The atmosphere of tranquil melancholy was effectively shattered, and Touya sighed, following Shindou through the house back to the main room. He flicked on the overhead light switch and winced slightly at the sudden brilliance.

"Come in, make yourself at home." Even grief couldn't entirely cover the irony in his tone. Shindou looked at him in confusion, before returning to his inspection of the room. Touya watched him for a moment, finally asking, "Are you looking for something?"

"Where's his goban?" That Shindou had all the tact of a bull in a china shop was not unexpected, but somehow Touya found himself hard-pressed to remind himself of his rival's nature and not take offense.

"You want to play a game?"

"Not really, but you do." Shindou had found the open window and was shutting it as Touya retrieved the goban from the closet where it had been placed. He had to admit a game sounded like a wonderful idea. The polished kaiou felt comfortingly familiar. He remembered the thousands of times he'd pulled this goban from the closet in preparation for games with his father, and felt fresh tears glaze his eyes. Kneeling to position the board, he paused a moment to let his bangs hide the signs of his sadness. Shindou had followed him to the open closet and arrived at the space beside the window a moment later, bearing the two coffers of stones. Touya took one and opened it, preparing to nigiri, but Shindou stood and disappeared down the hall, returning almost immediately with a pair of glasses. He pulled off his jacket, revealing a large bottle of sake and set it beside the glasses.

"You don't think grief is enough of a handicap?" Touya asked, sitting back on his heels and staring blankly across the board. Shindou shook his head, and poured two glasses.

"It's an Irish tradition. Kinume read about it in some magazine." Shindou reached into the coffer of black stones and set one on the board, reminding Touya of the game.

"The Irish play drunken Go?" His tone was filled with his incredulity at the thought, but his numb fingers worked without him, shuffling a handful of white stones onto the board. He stared at them blankly for longer than he should have. Shindou noticed, and leaned forward, beginning to count the stones himself as he replied.

"No, they get drunk and celebrate to honor their dead. It seems like a good plan to me," he shot a perceptive glance at his rival and friend. "I either get you drunk enough to have a good cry and pass out or wait until you starve and neglect yourself into the hospital, right? I just thought it would be better to get it over with quickly." He lifted his glass. "To Touya Kouyo: the scariest guy I ever played." Touya couldn't help but smile and raised his glass as well. Then they began to play.

---

It was after midnight when Touya came to the realization that he was no longer playing. They'd managed two games that he could remember, and Shindou had shared a wealth of his memories of his rival's father. Aided by his friend and the rice wine, Touya had found himself remembering aloud his favorite childhood recollections. He'd talked of the first time he'd played his father in a true, albeit handicapped, game. He'd shared anecdotes from his father's study sessions and matches. He'd delved deep into the past, until the heartbreak of the past week was suffused with a warmth of gratitude for the life that had so touched his. Oddly enough, Shindou had proved a surprisingly good listener.

Touya stared at the board. He was relatively sure he hadn't played any stones in a while. His suspicions were confirmed when he noticed that Shindou had both coffers and was replaying a game, rather than even attempting another round. There was something familiar about the pattern, but his clouded mind couldn't quite place it. Gradually, he became aware of Shindou talking.

"--and when he went here, I thought for sure it was over, but then Sai took this corner and--"

"This is father's game against Sai?" Touya was proud to note the lack of slurring in his words. Shindou nodded. That's where he'd seen it before. He nodded dully to himself as Shindou continued setting the stones of play. His rival's hands were far from steady, but he never missed a mark. At last, the bleach-banged man smiled, placing a final stone. They both stared at the goban for a moment. Then Shindou divided the last of the sake between their two glasses and raised his for a final toast. Touya was quite certain he'd had enough, but equally certain he needed to join the man.

"To your mentor and mine – until we can play them again." The glasses were drained, and Touya felt tears dampening his cheeks. What he hadn't expected were the glimmering streaks mirrored on his rival's face. Somehow, it made the moment transcendent. He felt the perfect understanding that sometimes came upon the two of them on the goban, and was filled with gratitude to his old friend. Then the sake overwhelmed him, and his body slumped quietly to the floor beside the game.

"Tch. You never did have a head for sake." But Shindou threw his friend's arm over his shoulder and somehow managed to drag him back to his own futon. Touya's face was a mess, but at least he had well and truly begun to grieve. It wouldn't happen overnight, but Touya would be able to move on with his life. _Just like I did... _

Hikaru staggered back into the main room, the rice wine catching up with him. He turned out all the lights until only the moon illuminated the room. The darkness mixed with moonlight in a sea of silver and shadows, and the world felt strangely unreal. Against the backdrop of the window, the man could almost make out two silhouettes kneeling beside the goban. A pale smile echoed a stern intensity across the polished wood.

He blinked, and the moment was gone. There were no ghosts to haunt him anymore, but neither was there pain. _We'll play again_ he thought, contentedly, and fumbled for his cell phone.

Ring. Ring. Ring. Then a sleepy voice mumbled on the other end of the line. The drunken man smiled at her understanding. "Akari? It's okay. You can pick me up now."


	6. Rivalry

a/n: Well, this was supposed to be my take on the cliché of the Mary Sue, but it didn't turn out that way. What follows instead is rather disturbing. For those of you who are going to hate it, my apologies in advance. This is still not a shonen ai story (nor will it be), but there was something that got me thinking.

Part 6: Rivalry

"You don't need that." Akira Touya stared over the goban to catch the eyes of the girl seated across from him as she hesitated over the black stone she'd just placed. "A four stone handicap is sufficient."

Her eyes registered her dubiousness at this thought, but her fingers reluctantly obeyed, returning the fifth stone to the go ke at her elbow. Bowing her head, she mumbled something in the direction of her lap.

"What was that?" He knew Shindou had a tendency to be rather lenient in the matter of his daughter's manners, but that didn't mean Touya had to accept it.

"I said, 'you're going to wipe the floor with me,' okay?" She glared at him with a look that was so familiar he almost laughed out loud, but the very familiarity warned him that would not be a wise choice.

"Naturally. But you'll learn more. You must fight for your advantages – not everything in life is freely given." He put a bit of a smile behind his words, softening the impact without removing the message. Touya had a fair amount of experience tutoring children and this child in particular, and knew a hint of honey always helped bitter medicine reach its mark. His experience was reaffirmed as the child nodded and smiled.

"Okay, but after this, we get to go to the park and feed the ducks." Her tone was confident, but there was at least a hint of pleading in her eyes. For all that she'd grown amazingly, she was still a child. He wondered how long that would last.

"Very well, but only if you lose by less than ten moku." There would be no throwing the game to make an earlier appointment with already-well-fed waterfowl. She nodded her agreement, then pulled herself into the rigidly formal posture she adopted when playing. They acknowledged each other and began another round of jigo, as they had on numerous Saturday afternoons.

She had improved tremendously in the four years they'd been playing. While there had never been any formal agreement with regards to her tutoring, she had developed a habit of showing up twice or thrice a month, asking to play. Of course, she always knew when he'd be around – no doubt utilizing her father's own awareness of his schedule. The strange part was that she generally seemed to appear at times when he was unopposed to playing her. That, he couldn't fathom.

And she was actually quite good. For an eleven-year-old to play him with only a four (or five) stones handicap was impressive, especially when one considered that she had played her own father only once, hid the fact that she could play at all from her mother, and consequently showed no interest in the game at school or anywhere someone might spot her. Touya assumed she played on the internet, and occasionally wondered what her handle might be. He also wondered what her father would say if he suggested to him that perhaps Kinume should be encouraged to join the insei program. He had a feeling he could predict her mother's response.

"Do you enjoy go, Kinume-chan?" He was genuinely curious. The girl looked up with irritation at the distraction, and he smiled, understanding. Questions would wait until after they'd finished. Instead, he watched her play, noting how carefully she seemed to consider each step, and how her mouth quirked into an unconscious frown of concentration. In almost all physical characteristics, the child resembled her mother, and it was only in the moments when she played that the other side of her parentage showed any trace.

The game ended as he'd expected. She resigned when a loss of roughly eight moku became inevitable, but her demeanor seemed uncharacteristically saddened by the loss. She noticed her teacher watching as she cleared the last of her stones, however, and quickly painted a bright smile on her face. "Time to feed the ducks!" she announced. She ran to the entryway to put on her shoes, while Touya stopped in the kitchen for a bag of stale bread. He seldom ate bread, but Kinume often fed the ducks, and he'd found they didn't care how old it was. He wrapped the plastic package up and placed it in the pocket of his jacket before joining his rival's daughter in the hall.

"Did you enjoy the game, Kinume-chan?" She was busily stuffing her arms into her coat, as he began tying his shoes. Whether she truly hadn't heard him or was simply pretending, he couldn't be sure, but once they'd both finished preparing for the outdoors, and made their way to the walk beyond the front door, she spoke up.

"I don't play go because I like it," was the curious response.

"Then why--?"

"Have you ever been in love, Touya-san?" He tried not to trip as they continued down the sidewalk towards the park. For a moment, he wondered if this were one of her whimsical subject-changing questions, but a look at the serious cast of her expression convinced him otherwise. It was an absurdly inappropriate thing to ask, and part of his mind resolved to have a long talk with Shindou about the manners a young lady should exhibit. Still, it was clear there was something very important in the question, and he was hesitant to halt the conversation entirely. He was trying to make up his mind how to answer, when the girl suddenly blushed. "I'm sorry! I shouldn't ask personal questions." Some memory of a parental admonition clearly filled her thoughts, and she looked up to gain his forgiveness. He nodded. Accepting that as pardon enough, the girl continued.

"It's just, I think love is a terrible thing. Tou-san and Ka-san are in love, and all it does is hurt them. They get angry and yell, and Ka-san cries and when I try to make her stop, she just says 'never fall in love, Kinume-chan.'" Her voice had the deliberately softened tone of one trying not to cry, and he wondered just how bad things had gotten between Shindou and his wife. It was one of several subjects that they never discussed, and he was simultaneously appalled and fascinated to hear of it from Kinume. They walked in silence for several moments before he realized that perhaps he should respond somehow. Glancing at the girl, he realized he had no idea what to say.

"I'm sure there are some good aspects to love," he ventured, hesitantly. In point of fact, he couldn't think of any at the moment, but it didn't seem right for a little girl to be so jaded.

"I'm never going to fall in love, Touya-san," she asserted, shaking her head for emphasis.

"You might find you become very lonely that way," he demurred, then blushed slightly as she looked up and caught his eyes. He was forever underestimating this child's maturity, and the hint of understanding that he saw in her gaze nearly had him panicking until she looked away.

"Not if I have something better." He was curious to know just what that might be and what it had to do with go, but they had arrived at the park and the ducks were waiting. Love and parents and black and white stones were flung from her regard as Kinume ran to greet her feathered friends. She was so excited she forgot the bag of bread scraps and had to come running back for them. He held out the bag, but she grabbed his hand anyway, and dragged her teacher to the water's edge to join in her excitement.

There was a certain joy in feeding ducks with Kinume. Touya helped for a while, then found a place on a bench from which to watch her. The girl laughed and teased and chased the birds, and he wondered that such happiness could float on the surface of what was turning out to be a rather deep individual. The sun was setting and the air was getting cold, when at last, she returned rosy-cheeked to join him on the bench. They sat for a moment, watching the sky, then the girl complained of hunger and Touya offered to take her home.

Walking back towards the train station, he watched as the merriment slowly left her face. Her eyes were drooping by the time they climbed aboard the train, but the look she cast out the window was strangely haunted for all its fatigue. They didn't speak throughout the ride. When at last the train stopped and the strange pair began their walk towards her home, Kinume finally spoke.

"Thank you for taking care of me today. The game was fun, and the ducks too. My mother appreciates your putting up with me." This last had the singsong quality of a phrase long drilled into the child, for all that he was sure she meant it.

"You're no trouble. Your play is really improving and I enjoyed your company. Just don't forget to practice before next time." He smiled to show he wasn't taking her for granted, then paused as an impulse struck him. "Kinume-chan, if I may ask, when you said you'd find something better than love, what did you mean?"

They were almost to her house, and she'd turned to skip the short way up her walk. Hearing his question, however, she stopped and looked back. A confident smile transformed her face and she laughed a little as she replied. "Rivalry!"

Two skips and the swish of a door, and she disappeared into the home that was not his. Outside, the street lamps flickered on, and Touya checked his watch. Twenty-minutes. He'd make it in plenty of time. The street was empty, the girl was gone, and in the go salon that had been his father's, his rival was waiting.


	7. Turbulence

a/n: This is short and I really can't name the cliché it deals with (perhaps the cliffhanger?). It seemed somewhat necessary after chapter 6, however, so here we go again.

Part 7: Turbulence

"Is there anything in your life more important than the game?" Touya phrased the question casually as they stood in the security check-in at the airport.

"Um, why?" Shindou was taking off his shoes to stack them in a plastic bin and wondering for the hundredth time why American airports had to be so troublesome when it came to security. He was debating whether he should have checked his fan (it was only bamboo and paper, but in a place where tweezers were a forbidden item, he couldn't be sure), as Touya answered.

"No reason," he said, suppressing a yawn. They'd only spent two days in New York, and Touya was convinced the jet-lag had yet to resolve itself. He hoped he'd be over it by the time they reached Portland. Conversation, if it could be called that, ceased as they each passed through the metal detectors under the stern gazes of airport security. Fujita-san and Mr. Gallagher, their guides while on this exhibition tour, were already waiting on the other side with the five others in their group.

The tour itself had been uneventful thus far. They'd been playing exhibition matches and discussing the game itself with American enthusiasts. While the level of players in this country was generally far below the standard found in Asia, the boisterous enthusiasm in things exotic for which this country was known had been nearly exhausting to the players. It was nice to think that perhaps the game would gain some popularity on these very foreign shores.

The flight from New York to Oregon was scheduled to take nine hours; not nearly as grueling as the journey from Tokyo to NYC three days ago, but nevertheless a long time to be stuck on a 'plane. Shindou and Touya were seated together in first class, and spent the half-hour of boarding and taxiing getting comfortable. Both stowed their shoes in the overhead compartments along with their carry-on. Touya grabbed a notebook of kifu printouts to study while Shindou pulled out a pair of headphones and an mp3 player. Touya couldn't hear the scratchy whispers of music over the ambient noise of the airplane, but watching his rival's head bob ever so slightly in time with the beat, he could guess it was rock-and-roll again.

By the time they reached their cruising altitude, Touya had given up on the kifu. The combination of concentrating on the small notations while trying to ignore the subtle shifting of the 'plane was making him feel vaguely ill, and he decided to try listening to the in-flight movie for a while. Beside him, Shindou's ears were still ensconced in the headphones, but his closed eyes and slack jaw belied his interest in music. His rival's ability to sleep anywhere was one of the many things Touya envied. At the moment, however, the comical way that Shindou's head was falling by tiny increments against the window had him more amused than envious.

The movie was boringly inane. He'd missed the first twenty minutes, and found himself unmotivated to try to figure out what was going on. The airline magazines were similarly uninteresting, but once again held the trouble of making him nauseated with their small print. With a resigned sigh, he stowed the "Travels" magazine back in the pocket of the seat in front of him. Beside him, his rival had begun to snore quietly. He thought about attempting to get a nap himself, but between his stomach and the uncomfortable nature of the seat, it simply wasn't happening. Lacking distractions and unable to sleep, Touya tried to meditate on his last game. It didn't work. He hated flying.

"Shindou?" Misery loves company. When Shindou slept through his query, he gave the sleeper a half-gentle shove. "Shindou, wake up."

"What?" Shindou's eyes were bleary and he looked decidedly annoyed at being awoken, but at least he was no longer asleep.

"I've been told the gardens in Portland, where we're to play, are quite lovely." Suddenly realizing that one has nothing at all relevant to say had never been a problem for Touya.

"You've got to be kidding me." It had often been a problem for his rival.

"The land was originally a zoo belonging to the city when--"

"I am not talking about gardens for the next," the bleach-banged man checked the display on his mp3 player, "four and a half hours, Touya." He yawned widely. "Why don't you just sleep if you're bored?"

"I'm not tired." Shindou stared at him, his look clearly conveying skepticism at this statement, but he sighed and sat up a little straighter in his seat.

"Fine." For a moment, they sat in silence, both casting about for something to discuss. "Want to play a game?" It always seemed to come down to that.

"How?" Touya was immediately interested, unsurprisingly. Shindou fully admitted to being obsessed with go, but privately liked to believe that he at least was slightly less so than his rival. Smiling, he motioned to Touya to get out of the way, then edged past him to retrieve a leather case from the overhead compartment. Within five minutes, he'd hooked up the laptop, balanced it between their two tray tables and was loading the net go program. The internet connection obviously wouldn't work, but he'd discovered that a two player mode existed that could be utilized in the absence of a remote partner.

"I'm black," commented Hikaru, typing in a handle for himself. Touya nodded, and typed in a name where Shindou pointed. He'd played net go quite a bit recently, but wasn't about to admit this fact to Shindou. The game began and Touya immediately found his irritation at flight replaced by the familiar excitement of a war in black and white. Shindou pretended annoyance at having to play rather than nap, but the ruse didn't last beyond the first two hands. They played a speed match, by unspoken agreement, and both dismissed the flight attendant's offer of a "snack" rather than interrupt the game. They finished with Touya winning by three moku less than an hour later. Neither had played at his best, but it was fun nevertheless. The helpful flight attendant came back to offer drinks and both men accepted.

"I think I'd like to play go forever." Shindou's contentment was obvious as he paused in gulping down his coke.

"Yes," Touya agreed. He allowed himself a small smile at the thought of challenging his rival until the end of time. It reminded him of a recent conversation, however and suddenly he had to know. "One wonders what Akari-san would say if she heard you, though." He watched Shindou out of the corner of his eye and noticed the slightest of frowns. Then his rival sighed and leaned back in his chair, gazing at the bank of reading lights and ventilation fans above their heads.

"She wouldn't say anything." There was an odd resignation in his voice.

"She's very tolerant. Your schedule has been quite full lately." He realized he was treading on paths they'd tacitly agreed to leave alone, but a little girl's jaded eyes goaded him.

"Why do you care?" The question held none of the ire he'd expected, instead it was as though Shindou was genuinely curious. For some reason, that was almost more disturbing.

"You're right. It's none of my business." Seeing his rival close his eyes, Touya turned again to the laptop, browsing through a file of saved kifu. He was surprised when Shindou spoke up several moments later.

"We have an understanding. We always have." His eyes remained shut. "She's my sanity. She keeps me connected to the real world, and I stay with her and take care of her while we both pretend I'm a better husband than I am." He smirked, but Akira heard the tightness in his voice. "I love her, and I know it's hard for her that I'm on the road so much, but if it came down to losing her or the game..." He didn't finish the statement. It occurred to Touya that his friend didn't know the answer himself.

"Has she asked you to make that choice?"

"No. And she won't, but I've seen Kinume watching me, and I wonder what Akari tells her when I'm away." He sat up and ran a hand through his hair, smiling. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't be telling you this."

"I asked." For all that Akira had no idea what to say beyond that. Hikaru seemed to understand, however, in that uncanny way.

"What would you do? I mean if it came down to love or the game?" His tone was casual, and he reached to realign the laptop so they both could see it. Akira's mouth abruptly felt dry and the nausea of a turbulence that no one else seemed to notice returned with a vengeance. He sat up a little straighter himself and stared past Hikaru out the window before answering.

"I'm not the right person to ask." He turned back to the kifu displayed on the screen. "My love _is_ the game." Hikaru seemed about to reply to this, but his rival cut him off.

"You should talk to Kinume." Akira suggested casually, while shifting to rest his forehead on his hands and his elbows on his tray table. "She thinks you'd choose the game over your family." Pressing his palms to his eyes, he continued. "Whatever understanding you and Akari have, she doesn't see it."

"When did you become an expert on my daughter?" The concern of a father for his child's whereabouts and acquaintances colored Hikaru's question, and Akira felt strangely relieved.

"She comes over to feed the ducks occasionally. She says it gets her out of her mother's hair." It wasn't the entire truth, but he had promised that the go would remain their secret.

"Oh." There was a long silence, and Akira thought perhaps the discussion was over. His stomach was really beginning to bother him, and he debated whether to stay with his friend in what had become something of an emotional moment or to give in and run to the bathroom. The 'plane lurched, and his decision was made.

When Touya returned from the jolting confines of the uncomfortable airplane lavatory, he felt almost normal again. Reaching his seat, he was surprised to see Shindou typing away at his laptop. The man was smiling strangely, and Touya wondered what had happened in the eight or so minutes he'd been absent. Shindou's moods had always been somewhat mercurial, but it never ceased to be disconcerting.

"Feel better?" his rival asked, glancing up from the screen.

"Yes. And yourself?" Touya bent to move the ends of the seatbelt off the chair before sitting, but nearly lost his balance when his rival answered.

"Yep. I just figured it out: I'm gonna retire."

The world seemed to tilt, and for once it had nothing to do with the airplane.


	8. Games and Games

a/n: Warning: major angst. I'm sorry about this, but the situation is too serious to resolve itself prettily. I promise the next episode won't be this rough. In any case, this is the most realistic take I could think of for a cliche I've seen many times in this fandom.

**Part 8. Games and Games**

"_You can't retire." Her voice was quiet, but firm, and she ran a gentle hand through his hair._

"_But, you--"_

"_Shh..." and she pressed her lips to his in a familiar kiss of silence. Drawing away, she spoke again. "I know what go is to you."_

---

"You can't retire." This time, Touya seemed to be trying for a rational approach. His voice was considerably calmer than the last six times they'd had the discussion between Portland and Narita. Perhaps it was his surroundings. This was a popular go salon, after all, and it wouldn't do to have the savy customers spreading a rumor that might lend inevitability to Shindou's decision.

"Will you shut up and nigiri already?" Shindou all but snarled. He was staring at the board with an intensity Touya had not seen since the Kisei match. It would have been frightening to any lesser player. Touya felt his breath catch with excitement. Hands and stones flickered across the board. Go ke's were handed over in silence and battle was joined in an icy click of slate on wood.

---

"_I love you." They'd said it so many times. The phrase had almost lost its meaning, but the hitch of tears just behind her eyes sent him running behind the protective spell of the words. Green eyes sought brown in the dimly lit room. "I love you." His arms squeezed tightly around her, pulling her whole body against him on the bed. Her suit jacket rumpled in his embrace, but neither of them noticed._

----

Today Shindou's play was desperate and vicious. The moves did not come quickly, but the pauses were filled with an almost palpable aura of calculation. A thousand gambits flashed behind his eyes in the minutes between each choice. Touya could almost see his rival's urgency as the cautious and the suicidal were thrown aside, until only the dangerous and the flawless remained. This was not a match of practice or fun. There was nothing of friendship or old vows on the board. In the purest sense, it was life or death.

Touya had thought that they would talk. He'd hoped for another chance to argue, and perhaps persuade, but the game flowed like a hurricane and he knew that this was, in the end, too important a conversation to shield with words. Today, he faced his rival. Today, the passion and the power of twenty years coalesced like the judgement of God, and they fought as men possessed.

Sweat sharpened the spikes of Shindou's hair. The nails of Touya's left hand drew bloody marks in his palm. Around them, the patrons of the go salon grew quiet, and began to watch, murmuring in whispers of excitement and concern. None of it mattered. The game was everything, and the game held them like a lover – like the last temptation of hell. There was no escaping. There was no distracting. There was only black and white: triumph and devastation.

---

"_But go is your life." He felt the fast-cooling streaks of her tears as they dripped down his neck. "I know you, Hikaru-chan."_

"_I could find another life. For you, I cou--"_

"_And come to resent me? When nothing else, no other job could feed your soul the way the game does?" She shook her head against his shoulder. "I love you too much to let that happen."_

---

It was becoming a war of attrition; every square contested, every point engaged. The challenge was in its third hour, but neither player had so much as sipped his tea. The rush of adrenaline had long since left them both, yet still they fought. Around them, the salon was closing. Only the die-hard spectators remained, and Ishikawa-san was sure to politely escort them out soon. Old men, who had witnessed hundreds of matches, shook their heads at the dogged stamina of youngsters. Young enthusiasts who'd only seen a handful of their idol's battles lingered in hopes of a conclusion before the close.

Behind her desk, Ishikawa herself worried for the two young men who had come to mean so much to her through the years. She had seen their first meeting. She had watched them become rivals, then friends. In the decades she'd tended the go salon, the amateurs had become professionals, and the boys had become men in a daunting series of games and arguments. In all that time, she had never seen anything like this.

Sitting across from one another, they had never looked so similar. Their postures were equally weary, their expressions equally pained. Even so, even now, the grim determination of their eyes never wavered.

---

"_I don't have to be a professional to play," his words were hot and desperate in her hair. "I've always liked net go, and I know Waya and Isumi and Nase would all still play me."_

"_And Touya," she whispered. He laughed slightly, in the choking way of a drowned man watching children play in a fountain._

"_He's my rival. We'll play until we die." For a moment, the thought of something so utterly constant comforted him. The relaxation of his shoulders was infinitesimal, but Akari felt it. She clutched him more tightly in the terrifying certainty that she had made the right choice._

"_I know," and suddenly, so did he. He crushed her to him, as if to deny her breath to continue. But inevitably, she did. "You'll have each other and you'll have your game and maybe one day, you'll even have the hand of God... but you can't have me." Sobbing overwhelmed her words, belying their strength and finality._

---

"I'm sorry, but I have to close... Thank you please come again... Of course I'll ask Touya-sensei if he would give you a kifu of the match... Good night." Ishikawa escorted the last of the customers from the salon. She had cleaned up the bulk of the tables while waiting, but a few things were left to be tidied. A quick canvassing saw to the last of the ash trays, and she gathered the trash bags together behind the desk. She heard the occasional click of yet another play as she tallied the register and placed the money in the safe.

When at last there was no more left to do, she turned to the owner and his rival. They were surely in the endgame by now, and yet something stayed her from interrupting. Touya knew to lock up, and something in these final hands seemed to demand privacy. Quietly, the woman settled her coat on her shoulders, and exchanged her work shoes for her outdoor ones. "Good night, Touya-sensei, Shindou-san." She said the words to herself, then bowed and left them to their fate.

---

"_But why?" He didn't really have to ask. He knew all of the reasons. The question was a reflex, instinctive; a plea for the chance to argue, or maybe for just a little bit more time. "Don't you..." She pulled away, then. Her eyes were swimming, her skin blotchy. The cool, small hands that had folded his shirts, picked up his empty soda cans, held his children, now reached up to hold his face between them._

"_Because I can't have you," she said, in words featherlight that hammered with the force of a hundred freight trains. "I can't compete."_

---

"Thank you for the game." Shindou said at last.

"Thank you for the game." His rival answered. Then he watched as his friend's head drooped over the goban, and listened to the tiny, choking sobs. Touya's eyes widened in shock, and yet, some part of him felt a certain inevitability to the man's behaviour. There had never been such a loss, or such a game, and the gut-wrenching feeling of termination clutched them both. Even so, Shindou's pain transcended the agonizingly beautiful carnage of the board.

Touya wanted to ask about the retirement. He wanted to beg for an answer, knowing that only the truth could penetrate this moment. His heart pounded with a need to know whether anyone, even so unpredictable a man as his rival, could walk away from a game like that, but in the end, a greater need intruded. "Are you okay, Hikaru-san?" was all he asked.

---

"_You'll be late for your meeting with Touya." She sat up, smoothing the grey wool of her skirt. Deft fingers straightened her hair, then she rose and walked to the bedroom mirror to dab at her eyes and compose her face._

"_I don't care about him, dammit! He can wait!" Hikaru sat on the edge of the bed, watching her as he had watched her on so many mornings. Akari turned around, her make-up artfully restored and a false, but pleasant smile shone on her face._

"_I want you to go, Hikaru-chan." She was telling the truth. Her eyes were sad, but held no malice – only love and despairing resignation. He wanted to shout at her. He wanted to be angry. Instead he stood, took her in his arms and kissed her with all the yearning he could put into the gesture. When at last he pulled away, she was breathless, but her expression had not changed._

"_Will you be here when I get back?" he asked, bleakly._

"_I don't know."_

---

In the darkness of the empty go salon, Akira moved his chair beside his rival's. He sat, then gently placed a hand on Hikaru's shoulder. He gave it the slightest of squeezes before letting go. Together, they stared at the empty battlefield.

"I couldn't see the next move," Hikaru whispered. "I don't know what to do."

"Whatever move you make, I will always answer," his rival replied.


	9. Highlights

a/n: And now for a lighter interlude. Cliché? I have no idea. My thanks to therhoda for putting my plotbunnies in a better mood. The lilies will come at some point, I promise.

**Part 9. Highlights**

"Touya-san!" Kinume stood in the open doorway, smiling from ear to ear. Her glee at seeing him was a little overwhelming, but not nearly as baffling as the twists of tin-foil interspersed seemingly at random through her dark, almost burgundy hair. He would never understand youth fashions. "Are you here for Tou-san?"

From further back in the house, Shindou's voice yelled, "Let him in and shut the door! You're letting all the heat out!"

"Please come in, Touya-san," she said in a very proper voice. The grin on her face and her lack of any accompanying bow or polite gesture detracted from the effect, however. He crossed the threshold anyway, and stood in the entryway. There was no sign of Shindou in the front room, but his backpack and jacket sat piled against the wall beside the coat closet. "Ka-san's out, but I'll make you some tea, if you think I should." Her eyes were questioning. She had a tendancy to look to him for instruction where etiquette was concerned, since clearly, no one stood on ceremony in the Shindou household.

"No need, thank you. We have to leave as soon as possible." He peered anxiously past the girl in the direction of the rest of the house. "Is he ready?" She glanced at her watch, and Touya experienced a sinking feeling. Shindou was perpetually nonchalant where time was concerned. Touya liked to be at least fifteen minutes early. He had called twice last night and once this morning to make certain that Shindou would be ready and waiting when he arrived with the car, but it did not seem to have worked.

"He's got about twelve minutes to go," confirmed Kinume. Touya resisted the urge to storm past her into the home and drag his rival out by the ear. Instead, he resigned himself to the situation and shuffled out of his shoes. His student gave him a conspiratorial smile.

"I'll be out in a minute!" came Shindou's muffled shout, even as his daughter whispered, "You wanna see something cool?"

"We are going to be late!" Touya yelled back, knowing it was futile. He nodded to Kinume, and she placed a finger to her lips. When he nodded again, she lead him back to the study and sat before her laptop. For a moment, he saw the display of an English-language web comic site before a click of the mouse revealed a net go game in progress. Touya's eyes flicked to the room's entrance.

"Don't worry, he can't hear me in here – he's in the bathroom," she said, but kept her voice low and one eye on the door. "Check it out, though. I'm playing Waya-san."

He looked over her shoulder at the screen, even as she scrutinized the board and made a play. The game appeared fairly straightforward, but Kinume was winning by two or three moku.

"What was the handicap?" he asked. At her offended look, he tried a different tack. "Are you sure that's Waya-san?" She smiled.

"I kinda hacked Tou-san's 'friends' file, so I know it's him. He wasn't paying too much attention at the beginning, though." Her grin faded slightly. "He's probably a lot better in person, huh?"

It was true this game was slightly below Waya's usual standard for competition, but it was certainly at the level of his recreational play. The thought of sponsoring Kinume into the insei program surfaced again, but given the current circumstances, he would never suggest it. Akari had left "on business" almost two weeks ago and her daughter's fate was uncertain enough without his unwanted interference.

That neither of her parents had informed Kinume of the currently tenuous nature of their relationship came as no surprise. Akari's business trip had actually been scheduled for this week, and they'd obviously used it as an excuse. Touya knew that Shindou was not dealing with the situation particularly well, but at least his daughter would be happy for a few more days. He noticed abruptly that the girl was staring at him, and realized that getting lost in thought in her presence could be hazardous.

"Is something wrong, Touya-san?"

"Your father is taking far too long. We're going to be late," he sighed, hoping she'd be convinced. "Your skills are improving, though," he motioned to the board, and she beamed. "There's a good chance you could win this game. Have you played any other of your father's friends?"

"Played my friends at what?" Shindou stood in the doorway, looking surprised to see Touya and his daughter nearly cheek to cheek at her laptop. Touya was equally surprised, but it had more to do with the numerous tin-foil rectangles encasing Shindou's bangs than with the suddenness of his appearance. Kinume was the only one not phased.

"Chess," she said with the perfect confidence of a child who has mastered the art of keeping her parents from knowing things they do not need to know. "I was telling Touya-san how I kick your... er... how I always win at chess with you and Ka-san," (Touya noted with some amusement that she glanced at him and not her father as she corrected her language), "and he was wondering if I'd played it with any of your friends."

"Well, you did play Kaga that one time... Anyway, can you check these for me?" He seemed slightly embarrassed at his rival witnessing what was obviously some strange sort of Shindou family ritual, but nevertheless made a deep bow. Kinume leapt from her chair, skipped, landing in front of her father, and picked open one of the odd metal envelopes with the look of a quality control engineer scrutinizing the work of a hopelessly incompetent worker. At last she nodded, condescendingly.

"They're not quite done, but if you wash them off now, they'll probably still lighten a bit as they dry." With a last inspection, she relinquished his hair, then squealed as her father took advantage of her proximity to grab the girl in a playful hug.

"You're such an expert." And he kissed the top of her head. Abruptly, Kinume noticed Touya still standing in the office, and flushed bright red.

"Toooooou-saaaaan! Not in front of company!" she hissed. Shindou gave a slight squeeze, but then let go. He stood up to look at her.

"Such a lady, today," he sighed, with feigned sadness that had an unfortunate hint of truth to it. Kinume didn't seem to notice.

"Anyway, you're going to be late, and Ka-san told me to take good care of you while she was away, so go back into that bathroom and wash out your bangs before they fall off. I already finished your lunch and it's in your backpack, and I put in some vitamins, since you've been run-down lately and I saw this commercial that said they work really well for that." She paused for breath. "Oh, and I called Oji-san and he said I could come over any time after noon, so that's where I'll be, in case I'm not here when you get home okay?" Shindou nodded.

"Just don't forget to take those out before you go," he gestured to the tin-foil twists in her own hair. "Touya, if you want to wait in the entry, I'm just going to rinse these and then we can leave. I promise, I'll only be a minute." He looked to Touya who sighed and shrugged. Shindou grinned and left the room. Kinume waited until he was out of sight, then quickly darted behind the laptop to make another move in her game before once again hiding it behind the comic site. She stood, gave Touya a last, secretive smile, and then lead him back out to the step in front of the door.

"You're dying your hair too?" he asked, oddly curious about the tin-foil. He also wanted to discuss the excellent move she'd made with seemingly no time to consider, but decided that secrets would have to wait for another day. She laughed.

"Yep. Ka-san never lets me, but Tou-san said just this once I could. I chose purple," the girl grinned. "I think it's gonna be really pretty, but I'm worried what Ka-san's going to say," she looked at Touya as if he would know, but he simply shrugged. She mimicked it. "Oh well. When she gets home, the secret's out, one way or another, huh?"

_Indeed_, thought Touya, but he merely nodded.

---

A few responses to reviewers:

First of all let me thank everyone who has been reading and reviewing this story. Your comments, suggestions, requests and criticisms have added a lot to the writing experience thus far. I look forward to hearing what you think of the next installments. I don't often post notes to reviewers, but there are a few I thought needed answering (whose email addresses I don't have).

Kireira: You noticed the names! Yea! Actually, it is deliberate. If you pay attention to the time first names are used instead of last, you'll probably see the trend.

Joana Seta: Wow. Thank you for the praise. Thank you further for giving a story a chance, despite its being out of your usual preferences. I've gotten a number of comments to the effect of 'Hikaru/Akari pairing bites,' but few have looked beyond that. Personally, I've never thought that that relationship could be a perfect (or even an easy) one, but since I like conflict, I had to go with it. Perhaps chapter 8 held truer to your perception of those two?

stlWill: The time change between episodes has been duly slowed. laughs It will probably speed back up again once they've all dealt with the current insanity. Please don't hate me for chapter 8.

e, mika, luce, shimmer-rain: yes, I will keep updating... at least for now. Just remember that in a story about ordinary life, there can be only one true ending. evil, if somewhat sad, smile


	10. Go Should Not Be Used, begin

a/n: Because it had to happen.

**Part 10. Go Should Not Be Used This Way, beginning**

"Where's Shindou?" Nase asked Waya as she joined him and Isumi in the go institute's elevator. Touya followed her, and they held the door for him, for all that he was not exactly one of their usual friends.

"Gone," Waya sighed. "Said something about going for a drive."

"Did he...?" Nase's question had the hesitant worry that had become _de rigeur_ when gossiping about Shindou these days.

"Third straight loss this week," her friend confirmed. Nase shook her head, Isumi pursed his lips. "What? Do you know something?" For a moment, Isumi looked conflicted about answering, but then:

"It's Akari." They all sighed. This was no surprise. "No, something new; she's been offered a job in America." That _was_ news. Touya, still ostensibly ignoring the conversation, was quick to catch the deeper significance. Of the others, Nase was the first to realize.

"She's taking their daughter with her?" she gasped, holding a hand to her mouth. She had a daughter of her own, and clearly the thought of losing her resonated. The elevator doors opened and they all exited. Touya walked somewhat slower than the rest, for all that they were headed in the same direction. He wasn't really part of this conversation. Even so, he listened as they made their way to the doors.

"Apparently she told him that she'd let Kinume stay when the girl could win an even match with him."

Nase gave a slight whistle. "That's a bit harsh. It's not like that's the _only_ thing he ever thinks about."

"That bitch is ruining his life! No wonder he can't play." Waya's asperity was met with both agreement and admonishment, but any further comments were lost as the three passed through the glass doors. Touya rearranged a few papers in his briefcase, then opened the door and headed down the street in the direction of his train stop.

The young man caught his train in plenty of time, and was even lucky enough to get a seat. The fact failed to please him. He sighed. The trend in Shindou's game was irritating. The way his rival had been avoiding social contact almost entirely was annoying. The fact that Hikaru apparently had yet to file the paperwork to divorce his wife was confusing, and the truth that Akira had actually spent so much time wondering about the entire situation was downright alarming. Beyond the window, city lights flashed past almost hypnotically. By the time he reached his stop, the young professional still had not put the issue behind him.

It would not do for both of them to fall to pieces. Shindou's life was as unpredictable as his play, and how he chose to handle both was entirely up to him. His moves tended to be deep and far thinking, and in the end often worked out well for him. With any luck, that strategy would prove successful in life as well. As to the strange aching sympathy and distracting concern Akira held for his friend... well there were more important things to concentrate on.

One of them was, in fact, sleeping on his doorstep.

Touya glanced at his watch: almost nine o'clock. He had no idea how long Kinume had been sitting there, but noting the way her breath caught even in sleep, he wasn't entirely sure he wanted to wake her. Even so, it was cold out, and the neighbors would no doubt think poorly of him were he to leave a child on his doorstep all night.

"Do your parents know you're here?" At the sound of his voice, she jerked awake, startled. For an instant, her eyes registered confusion, while her brain attempted to catch up. Then, the usual sure demeanor reasserted itself. She tucked a few purple strands behind her ear and stood.

"I told Ka-san I'd be staying with a friend." Something in her voice was not quite right, but he unlocked the door and ushered her in anyway.

"Did she give you permission?" He set down his briefcase and slipped off his loafers while the girl tossed her backpack into the hallway and tugged her sneakers roughly from her feet.

"She wants to take me to America!" Clearly maternal permission had not been an issue when Kinume left. "She wants me to leave my friends and my father and MY LIFE!" The girl stormed past her teacher in the direction of the living room, not waiting for a response. "She never even ASKED me what I might want. She doesn't CARE!" He heard her sniffle slightly on this last statement, and stopped in the kitchen to collect a packet of tissues before following her. By the time he reached the living room, Kinume was leaning into his closet, presumably to drag out the goban. "I don't want to go live in some foreign country," she tugged on something hidden by the shoji screen door, "and I don't want to speak English all the time," a harder tug, "and I..." but at this point, the goban pulled free of whatever had been hindering it, and the girl stumbled backwards, landing hard on her derrière while the board landed on her left shin with a thud. "I just don't want her to leave," she sobbed, although whether entirely from emotion or from the fall, Touya couldn't tell. He bent to lift the goban off her leg and carried it to its usual place beside the window. Returning, he handed her the packet of tissues, and withdrew the two go ke's from the closet. She blew her nose noisily, then stood and limped over to the board.

"There is ice in the freezer and plastic bags are in the second drawer down, to the right of the sink. Make use of both, please, while I change." She nodded and headed back to the kitchen, while Touya disappeared into his bedroom. He emerged several minutes later in a comfortable, if almost painfully matching ensemble of light-blue sweat pants and zippered pullover, bearing a hand towel. Kinume was sitting beside the board, left leg outstretched and bag of ice pressed against the already-forming bruise. One benefit of being clumsy her entire life was that she did know her first aid. Touya handed her the towel, and she wrapped the bag before reapplying it.

"So, why are you here?" he asked, sitting on the other side of the board.

"I need you to show me how to beat my father." Her voice wavered slightly, but her eyes were dead serious. He noticed that she had yet to place the usual three stones of her handicap.

"In time, I'm sure you could become a formidable opponent for him, Kinume, but--"

"Thursday. I need to beat him on Thursday." Angry tears sparkled at the corners of her eyes, and Touya decided not to chide her for interrupting.

"Impossible," he murmured, instantly wishing he had even slightly more of what his mother called people skills. "In a year, maybe two, I could--"

"It's the only way she'll STAY!" The girl all but screamed. This time, he did raise an eyebrow at her impoliteness, and she immediately subsided, weeping softly. Before he could stop her, she pulled herself to the side of the board to face him directly, and tucking both legs beneath her, bowed her head to the tatami. "Please, Touya Akira-sensei. Help me." He sighed and reached down to raise her chin. She did not smile, but got up and re-situated herself before the board, replacing the ice pack.

"Have you tried simply talking to her?" he asked. "Staking her daughter's future on a game of go does not seem like your mother's style." Kinume blew her nose again before replying.

"She wasn't going to give me _any_ option. I overheard her fighting with Tou-san, and when she said that I could stay if I beat him, I stepped in and told her I accepted before she could take it back."

"Kinume, even _I_ only defeat your father about sixty percent of the time." He looked up at her small, bitter laugh, and raised an eyebrow questioningly.

"He says he wins sixty percent of the time, too." Her pride was obvious, even through the remnants of her earlier outburst. The go master bit back a retort, choosing instead to demonstrate his point.

He withdrew a handful of white stones from the go ke at his right knee, placing them on the board. Surprised, Kinume extracted a single black stone from hers. She'd guessed wrong. They traded coffers and he placed an opening move. "Have you discussed this competition with him?"

"He had to leave for a game." That certainly explained the loss to Waya.

"I'm certain, given the circumstances, that he will happily throw the game for you," mused Touya. Strange that part of him was disappointed at this thought. For all the unfairness of stakes, he was rather looking forward to the day his student surprised his rival.

"And have Ka-san say he cheated and she doesn't have to honor the agreement?" She began a strong opening sequence. "Anyway, once she figured out I was serious, Ka-san and I talked terms," she gave a loud sigh. "I'm pretty sure she was trying to talk me out of it."

"So what are the terms?" She was doing well, but already, Touya could see the inroads he would exploit to win this game. She never played her best while talking. He placed a stone.

"I'm black, but there's a half-point komi, so no ties." Her next move was better than her last, but still not spectacular or surprising. "Oji-san's bringing the board, and we're playing at his house so that nobody can get mad." Touya could see the wisdom of utilizing an elder family member's home. It would give all concerned a reason to remain civil, and provide some distance from the troubled confines of the family's own house. He played, and she continued. "Other than that, I'm allowed to invite one friend, if I want – anyone I want. Ka-san has to watch the whole game, no matter what happens, and she can't move anything out of her room until it's over. If I win, she doesn't move to America. If Tou-san wins, I go without complaining. Oji-san will be there for Tou-san, and because he said a game like this should only be played on his board..." Her eyes focused on the game in front of her, and he could see her beginning to realize her peril. Placing her next move, Kinume's fingers were less certain than usual, the tiniest tremor betraying her. Touya's response was immediate. He watched as she scanned the board.

"Will it make any difference if you only lose by a small margin?" Surely Akari would grant her daughter, and herself, some concession. She had to know how thoroughly the holder of two professional titles was likely to defeat an amateur. She had to realize how this game could devastate both her husband and her child. Did she care that the latter would hold herself responsible for her mother's leaving if she lost? Was she pleased that her husband would never be able to take joy in the game again if he won with such stakes as these? Her daughter was concentrating on the game, now, and could not answer. For the next forty minutes, the only sound was of clicking stones.

Touya faced the child across from him, his eyes boring into hers. She saw it, and he could see that she saw it. Kinume bowed. "I resign." It had been a surprisingly decent game, given the circumstances, but Touya had still defeated her mercilessly. "Oh God, it's hopeless," she whispered. They cleared the board in silence, while she struggled not to cry again. He was about to suggest that he take her home, when she raised her face and set her jaw. "It's hopeless, but it's all I've got." She sat up a little straighter, wincing at the motion of her leg. "I'm not leaving until Thursday." She smacked a handful of white stones down on the board in challenge. He'd heard that tone of voice before.

"Very well." _I owe Shindou this, and so much more... _"Perhaps before we play again, you should study a few kifu." He stood, heading to his office to print out the ones he had in mind. He heard her running water in the kitchen.

"Thank you, Touya-san," she called down the hall. "Oh, and do you have any aspirin?"


	11. Go Should Not Be Used, end

a/n: Three separate clichés all in one. Yes, the Mary Sue is about as blatant as she will be for the entire rest of the series (I hope). Thank Heaven I am done with this arc (just the arc, though – the story will continue a bit lighter for a while after this). It took a surprising amount out of me, and I don't want to get that heavy again for a while. As always, comments and criticisms are appreciated.

**Part 10. Go Should Not Be Used This Way, end**

_three days later..._

She had fallen asleep at four o'clock in the morning. That Kinume had stayed awake and studying until then was a testament to her dedication – or perhaps desperation. Touya had left her only twice to attend to prior engagements, and both times had returned to find her still hard at work. When at last she had succumbed, he hadn't moved her from her place beside the goban for fear she'd reawaken. Instead, he'd tucked a blanket around the slumbering girl, removed the board and turned off the lights in silence.

Dawn found her nestled in the blanket, head pillowed on one arm. For several moments, her mentor watched without speaking, understanding the tiniest part of what his rival feared losing. He had tried to locate Hikaru – to let him know of his daughter's whereabouts, and perhaps offer support – but the man had been like a ghost. According to Hikaru's friend, Kawai, he had probably gone to Hiroshima, but that was as much of a lead as anyone had. Even so, Touya had no fear that he would be at the game today. There was no chance he could leave this child behind.

"Kinume." She rolled over, and curled her other arm tightly over her head. "Kinume, you should probably go home and change." The arm was thrown up as eyes flew open.

"I fell asleep?! Touya-san, why didn't you--"

"You needed rest." He interrupted her accusation. Perhaps the child's bad habits were contagious. "It's impossible to play well when exhausted." She sat up, and he walked past her to the kitchen.

"I'm still not good enough, am I?" Her voice was resigned as she opened her backpack and placed it on the kitchen counter, pulling clothes and a small bag that smelled vaguely floral from the depths. Her hands shook slightly and Touya was quite certain three hours' sleep had not been enough. He considered her question carefully before answering.

"When your father was a child, and supposedly not very good at go, he occasionally played amazingly advanced games when under intense stress." Touya had not thought about those early games in quite some time, but they seemed very pertinent now. "Perhaps that same Shindou talent will be with you today," he offered. She smiled.

"You're not a very good motivational speaker, Touya-san, but I'll pray to Sai anyway, if you think it'll help." Her face split in an echoing yawn. "I'm borrowing your bathroom." She left before he could say anything.

---

They arrived at Kinume's great-grandfather's home just a little before ten in the morning. Kinume had grilled her teacher about go and her father's playing style for the duration of the train ride, but when they'd left the station to walk the last little ways, she'd grown quiet. When the door opened to her knock, the aged gentleman on the other side stared at her and her choice of companion for almost a solid minute before speaking.

"Kinume-chan, welcome." He seemed to realize he was staring, and opened the door wider, beckoning them to enter. "And this is?" His tremendous curiosity was as clear as the fact that he recognized Touya Akira. Kinume did not smile, but answered coolly.

"Ka-san said I could bring a friend. This is my friend, Touya Akira-sensei. Touya-sensei, this is Oji-san." The old man smiled at her faintly challenging tone, then closed the door behind them and took their coats.

"Your parents are playing a game before your match... are you okay?" She did look pale, and the fact that she'd left the dark purple highlights of her bangs long, framing her face, did not help. She looked about ready to collapse, but the steel in her eyes belied it.

"How would you be? He's taking me seriously, huh?" She smiled and her great-grandfather chuckled. Touya guessed that practice games between the Shindous must be a regular preface to important matches, and wondered at the insights he continued to learn about his rival, even after all this time. The girl and the old man were walking ahead, and he followed them, temporarily forgotten.

It was an exceptionally lovely day. The goban had been set up in the living room, just inside, with the shoji open to the early spring sunshine. Akari and her husband were framed in the light, their eyes fixed on each others' hands. The casual intimacy of long practice hesitated like a phantom in the moving of stones, but the absence of warmth or smiles from the players prevented it from settling in. Even as the two newcomers entered, Akari resigned. Hikaru touched her hand as she began withdrawing her pieces, but she didn't acknowledge him. He sighed and cleared the board.

"Ahem," Oji-san cleared his throat, and the two looked up, startled. "Your daughter and her friend have arrived." Then several things happened at once as Akari stood to hug her child and Hikaru turned to stare at Akira, confusion practically painted on his face. The girl and her mother exchanged whispered words into each other's hair.

"What are _you_ doing here?" Hikaru didn't raise his voice, but that seemed due more to an inability to fully accept the fact of his rival's presence than to any sense of propriety. It suddenly seemed like a very good question. This was about as personal as a family event could be, and despite the closeness Akira had come to feel to this particular family, the fact remained he was not a member. Finally, he dragged a few words from his throat.

"I came to watch you play." Not a good reason. Not even a truly rational one, but it was all he could think of. Hikaru's eyes widened in disbelief just as Kinume interrupted.

"I invited him," she said, and her father seemed to truly notice her for the first time. Something passed between them as eyes locked, but Akira could not begin to fathom what it was. Emotions had never been his strong suit, and he was feeling increasingly uncomfortable. "You always play your best in front of your rival, and I don't want Ka-san backing out and saying you cheated if by some tiny chance I win." Then her voice softened and she turned beseechingly to her mother. "Unless, of course, you'll let us stay without this? Please?"

"I can't let him take you for granted, Kinume-chan." If sadness were an ocean, Akari was the Pacific.

"Are you sure you're not the one taking her for granted?" Hikaru's voice was as bitter as salt. The spouses faced each other, and their grandfather moved to intercept, but it was Touya's emotionless voice that broke their contest.

"Go should not be used this way," he admonished quietly. Akari looked stung, and Hikaru despairing, but their grandfather nodded his approval. Consequently, none of them saw Kinume take her place at the goban. All were startled by her soft reply.

"I want to play you, Hikaru-chan." The voice was wrong for boisterous Kinume, terror of the duck pond. Her posture at the board was rigidly still and her eyes stared at the ancient grid with a curious fixity.

"K-chan..." her father hesitated, while her mother sighed and sat on a cushion to watch. Shindou's grandfather motioned Touya to another cushion, before pulling out a tea tray for the three of them. Akari began to pour as Kinume looked up from the board to meet her father's eyes.

"It's been a long time since we played, but it's going to be okay." She smiled strangely at him, from her pale, exhausted face. At least, reflected Touya, the fear seemed to have left her. Hikaru seemed to think for a moment, then pulled his cherished fan from the pocket of his jeans. He held it out to her.

"For luck," he offered. The girl took it and flicked it open once before gently folding it shut.

"You're going to need it." The folded fan concealed her gently curving lips. Her father took his place across from her, and they offered the ritual greeting.

She reached for the first black disc, raised her hand... and hesitated. It was only the slightest fraction of a second, and only Touya, who had seen her play dozens of games in the past four days, noticed, but for one instant, she had paused.

Shindou didn't see it. He and the other family members were impressed that she knew how to hold the stones at all, let alone play a decent opening move. He responded readily enough with a white reply, and Kinume took a second stone. This time she placed it quickly, and Touya decided the initial pause had been nerves. Her father once again responded quickly, and she followed along with opening moves that had an odd feeling of long practice. It was when they were seven hands in that Akari and Shindou's grandfather began to realize that the child knew a great deal more than they had guessed.

Touya wondered whether Shindou would suspect him, but looking at his rival he realized he should not have worried. Kinume was playing exceptionally well, and the emotions had gradually leached from her father's face until only the intense concentration and excitement of playing remained. If Akari had been worried her husband would lose on purpose, she was delusional. Shindou had forgotten his opponent, the stakes and everything else. He was playing to win.

Kinume for her part, looked stressed, but determined. Every now and then, her eyes would flicker to her right, glancing towards her mother. Occasionally, her hands would hesitate before a crucial move. Sweat darkened her purple bangs to a shade that was almost black, but she smiled as she played. She seemed almost excited, enjoying this dance of stones and spaces in a way that reminded Touya very strongly of her father as a child.

"How does she know..." Akari murmured, but her gaze remained fixed on the players.

"Well, she is nationally ranked in chess... do you suppose that might explain it?" Shindou's grandfather didn't sound as though he particularly believed this theory, and was obviously as baffled as Akari. For several moments the sound of their speculation was almost as loud as the contemplative silence of the go players. Then two pairs of eyes fixed on Touya: one amused and one incensed. He ignored them both. The game filled the board like a glass-blower's breath; an instant's inattention, and the world could shatter.

---

Something was wrong here. An hour had passed. The match was well into the middle phase, and while Shindou was obviously playing an excellent game, his daughter was winning. Like the artful poses of a Noh actor, her moves were cunning and elegant. The game itself had a depth and intricacy that easily surpassed anything Touya had seen her play. The grid was like a darkened stage where players met and spun away, only to meet again. Their footsteps were playful, yet intimate; a courtship of partners long estranged. The curious down-to-the-wire brilliance of the Shindous appeared to have returned.

And just like that, it was over. Shindou and his daughter stared at the board with near identical looks of fearful fascination. She blanched, and he began to smile.

"Arimasen," Shindou bowed to the shaking girl, with a look of joy and wonderment.

For several moments, no one breathed. Shindou's grandfather was smiling, while Akari looked somewhere between shock and wistful regret. Finally, Kinume answered.

"T-Thank you for the game." She glanced to her right, shook her head and then looked again, her eyes seeking her mother's. "Ka-san..." she began, but her mother wasn't looking at her. Instead, Akari was focused on Hikaru, drinking in his amazement and excitement and enjoyment of the game that his daughter had given him.

"Perhaps I _am_ the one who was taking her for granted," the woman whispered, as tears formed in her eyes. Hikaru saw and went to his wife. He took her hands in his.

"Let her stay, Akari. Until you're ready to come back, please let her stay with me." His voice was soft, but firm.

"How could she... when was there time...? How long did you lie to me, you both?!" Her words broke in a sob, even as her eyes grew heavy with loss and betrayal. "You ch--"

"I did _not_ throw this game." He cut her off mercilessly, his sympathy and pain retreating behind defensive sharpness. "Ask Touya, if you don't believe me."

They turned to the remaining spectators, only to discover the cushions empty. Touya and Oji-san had moved to support Kinume Shindou, who sat laughing weakly at the empty air beside the goban. "We did it, we did it," she laughed in exhausted hysteria. "Touya-san, I'm sorry." Her eyes were just the smiling side of mad. "Oji-san, this board..." Her great grandfather took her hand and held it firmly, but as she stared across the goban one last time, her wandering gaze finally rested on her father. Leaning forward, she held his fan back out to him, her arm nearly grazing the abandoned stones. "Tou-san..." he knelt to take the fan from her, even as Akari saw the depth of her child's distress and gasped.

"...Sai..." The girl's lips whispered. Then silken purple flowed over the stones as her arm went limp and her head fell to the board. Only Touya's quick reflexes saved her skull from hitting hard. By the time he moved his arm to release her, Kinume was fast asleep.

Akari choked, and her grandfather-in-law escorted her away to the kitchen to compose herself and help him brew more tea. At the goban, Hikaru set his fan aside, and took his daughter from Akira to cradle in his arms. For a time, he simply held her, rocking gently, uncaring of the propriety or the company. Then he looked up, and acknowledged his rival.

"Was it worth watching, Touya?" There was an edge to the question. It seemed to invite and banish all at once. There were no words to answer such a question, and they both knew it. There was no denying the kind of miracle still scattered across the grid. Instead, Shindou's rival chose a question of his own.

"Who is Sai?" The rival's gazes locked for a moment. An old challenge balanced on the understanding between them. Then Shindou smiled, burying his face in his daughter's hair. His eyes closed and Touya knew he'd be ignored again. He heard Akari and Oji-san returning, but beneath their footsteps, he heard Shindou's faint reply.

"Good question..."


	12. Going the Distance

a/n: For Jenn-san. Sorry I can't actually write what you want to read – but this comes close. Anyway, this is a little interlude about six months after the last story (for those interested in continuity).

**Part 12. Going the Distance**

"What is this?" Akira was standing in his doorway, overnight bag in hand, glaring past his old friend at the conveyance parked on the street. He knew what it was, but his mind refused to accept that Hikaru actually meant for them to travel all the way to Izu in such a vehicle.

"Don't you like it? Tsubaki found it for me." Hikaru actually had the nerve to smile and stroke the black leather of the seat. The conveyance remained two-wheeled.

"It's a motorcycle." Akira stated flatly. Clearly some explanation was required.

"Well what do you know? You recognized it! And here Waya thinks you don't get out much..." he grinned, utterly unconcerned.

"Aren't you a little young for mid-life crisis?" The patronizing quip was an instinctive reaction to his rival's smugness, but he regretted it almost instantly as Hikaru seemed to deflate slightly. Then the man gave a rueful smirk.

"There's no crisis a motorcycle can't help. At least that's what Tsubaki says." His eyes were cheerful again. His rival sighed in outward annoyance and inward relief.

"You said you'd arrange a car," he challenged, returning to the matter at hand. Akira's own was in the shop, and when Hikaru had overheard him mentioning it to Ishikawa the other day and offered to share a ride to the conference, he had thought it a stroke of luck. He'd never considered his friend could so misjudge his travel preferences.

"I said I'd split a ride with you," Hikaru corrected, starting to get irritated, but clearly still amused. "I never said on what." The grin was growing wider, and Akira tried to keep anger in the forefront of his mind to dispel his... fear?

"Where will I put my overnight things?" he demanded, cold logic coming to his rescue. Hikaru stepped back slightly to pull open one of the side compartments, revealing a surprisingly capacious cargo space. _Or perhaps not._

"Plenty of room." The grin thinned slightly towards stubbornness.

"I don't have a helmet," the safety-conscious man stipulated.

"I brought an extra," the increasingly hostile young man said, handing him what looked like nothing so much as half of an over-sized, bright yellow ping pong ball with black padding and a chin strap. It matched the bike. Something in Shindou's eyes dared him to object for fashion reasons. Touya refrained. He hedged.

"Do you even know how to drive that thing?" He tried to sound disdainful, but his voice was unnaturally high. Shindou's fists clenched at his sides.

"I made it here, didn't I?" The grin was gone and stubbornness was well on its way to single-minded determination. "Anyway, if you keep stalling we're going to be late."

"The conference isn't until tomorrow morning."

"FOR CHECK IN!" Shindou yelled. They glared at each other. Finally, with as much dignity as he could muster, Touya handed his bag to Shindou, who quickly stowed it away. He folded his blazer and tucked it into the open side compartment. "You're gonna want a jacket," commented Shindou. Touya glared harder at the advice, but went back inside to retrieve a seldom-used, but beautifully fitted black leather jacket and gloves. He pulled on all three, zipping the former as he walked down to the motorcycle.

Shindou pulled on his own bright yellow helmet. The stylized "5" emblazoned on its side would have brought a smile to Touya's eyes under other circumstances. As it stood, he resolutely found the fashion statement childish. His rival slid into the front seat and shifted slightly to get comfortable. Shindou smiled at his genteel friend, who glared harder, but managed to situate himself in the passenger seat just the same. Shindou started the engine, then grinned over his shoulder at his reluctant passenger. "Here we go!"

The bike lurched slightly, before settling into motion. Shindou was smiling, clearly enjoying the drive through Touya's quiet, residential neighborhood. His rival, on the other hand, gripped his own knees so hard his knuckles went white. The sight of the ground racing past beneath him was deeply disturbing for all that they were only doing perhaps 40kph at the moment. He brought his eyes back up, feeling vaguely nauseous. A fear he hadn't known he had tightened his shoulders into aching knots, his breath came in panicked gasps, and a distant part of his mind wondered whether Shindou would even notice if he fell off.

"I can't do this," he said.

"WHAT?" Shindou yelled back.

"I CANNOT DO THIS!" _And as soon as this infernal machine stops, I am going to kill you_, he did not add.

"Geez! If you're that scared, just hold on to my waist and close your eyes!" Rather than slow down, he accelerated slightly, bouncing a little as they crossed a rain channel. Akira found he did not need to be asked twice, and was holding Hikaru for dear life with both eyes squeezed shut before he'd consciously registered what had happened. He felt his rival laughing and silently resolved to destroy him the next time they played. Then Hikaru made a left hand turn, and he concentrated on remembering to breathe.

By the time they reached the highway, Akira was exhausted. His arms ached, his back hurt, his knees felt numb. He hated the motorcycle with a deep and heartfelt loathing, but at least his physical weariness had taken the edge off his fear. A surge of fresh panic turned his stomach as Hikaru accelerated to merge, but Akira discovered himself curiously detached from the sensation. By the time their speed stabilized, he had decided it was the resignation of the samurai who faced every combat as though already dead. The dead, after all, had nothing further to fear from motorcycles or pavement or idiot rivals with no sense of courtesy. At least Hikaru's jacket smelled nice.

When he finally felt confident enough to open his eyes, the sheltered go professional found that the concrete jungle of Tokyo had been replaced by suburbs complete with sporadic hints of forest. The steady traffic of the highway flowed around them like some odd sort of river. A whale-like semi-truck to their left made him blanch with its proximity, but then Hikaru took them past it, and only a brief buffeting of turbulence signaled its memory.

Glancing around carefully, he noticed that the other cars on the road looked strangely short from this new perspective. At one point, he found himself almost eye to eye with an infant in the rear of an SUV. The baby smiled, and he smiled back, ignoring his yellow-headed reflection in the window. He let his arms relax a little.

"Are you okay, Touya?" The words were clearly yelled, but barely audible above the rush of wind past his ears.

"I'm alive!" he yelled back, leaning forward to place his words as close to Shindou's ear as possible. His friend smiled, clearly having missed the "no thanks to you" at the end of Touya's statement. He sped past a tiny Toyota to their left and swung into the lane beside the guardrail. The leaning motion was enough to send his passenger's arms back into their earlier death grip, helmet pressed against his back and eyes once again shut. By now, though, the seemingly fragile young man had become slightly accustomed to the movements of the odd machine. Only ten minutes passed before the amused driver felt his friend relax again.

Hikaru smiled into the wind and looked over the guardrail to the horizon where sparkling ocean could now be seen. It would have been better at sunrise, but it was still a breathtaking view. He wondered if the ocean and the wind and the freedom of the highway were things his rival could ever appreciate. Hikaru himself had taken such things for granted until his brief period of being haunted. Seeing the world through Sai's wistful gaze had shown him the transient beauty of moments, and while he could never ponder them as poetically as his old master could, he recognized their value.

"Isn't this great?" he called to his passenger. He felt the slight shift as Akira turned to look. The sound of the engine and the wind remained unbroken for a long pause. Then he felt the arms around his waist tighten ever so slightly as his passenger stared out to sea.

"Actually, it is..." The words in his ear were oddly introspective, but Hikaru didn't notice. He smiled triumphantly at oncoming traffic.

"Forgive me, now?" he practically crowed.

"I wouldn't go that far."


	13. Famous Last Words

a/n: Not to worry – this isn't a death fic. It's more of a set up for another cliché of the HnG fanfic world. Enjoy.

**Part 13. Famous Last Words**

"Would you like to come in?" They'd reached Akira's house and the passenger was glad to be done with his helmet. He returned it to its owner and watched as the man stowed it away. Hikaru seemed unusually slow in his actions, confirming his reluctance to leave. "It's still early. We have time for a game..." a thought occurred to Akira, "unless you need to get home to Kinume, of course."

"Nah. Akari got back from America yesterday so K-chan won't be missing me." He grinned. "I've got plenty of time to trounce you, and a game sounds good."

"You're confident. I take it this weekend's opponents didn't impress you?" Touya was teasing his rival, albeit gently. He knew full well there hadn't been anyone present who compared to Shindou's level.

"It gets so frustrating playing shido go over and over..." the pro admitted.

Touya smiled. He understood. Whereas he had accepted teaching as a part of the professional lifestyle, and even enjoyed it to some extent, Shindou had never managed to see it as more than an inconvenience. He enjoyed meeting new people and socializing with all manner of easy acquaintances, but where a go board was involved, he lived for competition. This was not to say he was ever impolite. Shindou's teaching games were lively and much sought after. But they seldom entertained the teacher himself.

Shindou locked the motorcycle up as Touya opened his door. Inside, the host quickly removed his shoes and jacket before walking to the kitchen to put the kettle on. Shindou apparently took his time in the entryway, for the water was boiling when he finally made his way into the living room.

"You can set the board up," Touya called. "I'm just getting tea. Do you want some?"

"Yeah. Sure." Touya heard the closet doors open and the muffled thumps of goban and cushions being dragged into place. When he arrived in the living room bearing two cups, Shindou was setting out the go kes. Touya handed him a cup of tea, they sat, and after a moment of rearranging to ensure no knees would fall asleep or cups be knocked over, opened the coffers. Touya noted idly that he always seemed to begin with white. He wondered at that only a moment before placing his handful on the board as Shindou made his guess. Correct as usual – at least where their casual games were concerned.

"So Akari is back already?" There were games that they played with ferocious intensity, and there were games where the click of the stones was more of a counterpoint to conversation. This game had the slightly easier air of the latter, and Touya took the opportunity to chat. It was strange, but despite two days together at the conference, they'd had barely a moment to converse. Shindou's latest mode of transportation didn't lend itself to conversation either.

"Yep. Her six months are up and the company managed to find her a position back in Tokyo," his voice had the slightly flat quality it always had when he spoke about his wife lately. Then he grinned and made a particularly clever move, pulling his opponent's attention back to the grid. While Touya tried to read his intentions, his rival continued with the slightly distracting garrulousness he knew his opponent found annoying. "Kinume's thrilled, of course. She missed her a bunch. I guess I don't understand all the feminine stuff teenage girls need to talk to their mothers about."

Touya smiled slightly. He'd caught on to Shindou's strategy. Placing a stone, the pro's mind caught back up with the conversation. He frowned. "Kinume is only twelve..." Shindou played his reply quickly. It would take two more hands for him to realize all was not as he'd planned.

"Well, yeah, but she's almost thirteen and she's, well... growing up." Something in his tone made Touya look up to catch his rival blushing slightly. He couldn't imagine why and something in his eyes must have indicated as much because Shindou elaborated. "You _know_." He made the vaguest of gestures to his chest and Touya, abruptly understanding, joined him in the blush. "Training bras..." the young father shuddered. They both sipped their tea and concentrated on the board for a few hands.

"So-" Touya began, but when it came out as a squeak he took a breath and tried again. "So where is Akari staying, now?" It sounded about right. Shindou took a moment to hear him. He'd noticed Touya's subtle bid to upset his shape in the upper left and was putting some thought into his reply. At length he placed it, with a casual smirk as if to say he was not in the least daunted. Then he remembered the question.

"Oh, I gave her the house. She wanted primary custody while we're separated, and I didn't want Kinume to have to move, so that seemed like the thing to do." He tried to make it sound nonchalant, but did not entirely succeed. Touya felt slightly annoyed with himself for letting his curiosity dwell on a painful subject. He made an unusually daring move by way of distraction, only afterwards noticing how much like one of Shindou's own moves it was. Shindou noticed it too and chuckled. "Twenty-one years and I'm finally rubbing off on you."

"Don't get cocky." Touya not-quite-growled, his eyes narrowing into a familiar glare. Shindou only laughed.

"Next thing you know, you'll be wearing T-shirts and dying your bangs," he teased, oblivious to his rival's growing annoyance, or perhaps enjoying it.

"And eating ramen for every meal and falling asleep during match discussions? I don't think so," Touya shot back, punctuating his retort with a move that was decidedly his own style.

"Hey, that only happened once, and I'd been up with a sick baby the night before!" A black stone was slammed in response to the white.

"Excuses, excuses," murmured the younger man. He played his hand with motions bordering on the delicate in deliberate contrast to his rival.

"Oh yeah? You try being a parent some time." Shindou slapped a stone down with smiling confidence, recovering from his outburst with a speed that suggested subterfuge. Touya paused to look more closely at the arrangement and saw the deeply hidden barb that had been so beautifully set up. He sat back on his heels to consider his strategy. Shindou relaxed on his cushion, drinking tea and clearly pondering. "Actually, Touya, why _don't_ you get married? I mean, do you even date? I've seen enough women watching you..."

"Huh?" He wasn't entirely sure he'd heard correctly, coming up from his thoughts after deciding on a conservative but sound plan. He lifted a stone to place, but nearly dropped it as his rival's next statement penetrated his thoughts.

"And don't tell me you don't like women, because there's no way your mother could have left that pink-and-purple sweater I saw hanging in the entry." Shindou grinned. "So who is she?" Touya's eyes went wide as his mind searched around for an answer. In point of fact, it was Kinume's sweater, but explaining what she'd been doing in his house long enough to forget her sweater was problematic. After the game with her father, Touya had assumed the secret was out, but the girl herself had insisted their games not be revealed just the same. He thought it somewhat silly, but had agreed to keep his promise of secrecy. Now he was caught.

"It's not what you think." When in doubt, omission was a better policy than outright lying. "And in any case, I don't see how my love life or lack thereof is any of your concern." He let a certain amount of the flustered irritation he was feeling permeate his voice and hoped Hikaru would take the hint. His opponent shrugged, clearly unconvinced, but backing down just the same. They settled into the game after that and kept their conversation confined to the polite and simple words of stone and strategy.

When the game finally ended, Touya winning by two and a half moku, it was after eleven. Hikaru yawned. Akira looked at the blackness beyond the window. "Shindou, if Akari is staying at your place, where are you staying?" It had suddenly occurred to him that a separated couple couldn't very well live in the same house. Hikaru shrugged, standing and heading toward the entryway. Akira followed, listening to his reply.

"Hotel, probably. I'm going to that thing in Beijing in two weeks, and after that I've got an apartment mostly lined up." There was a time when his rival's absolute nonchalance over such a thing as where he was living would have shocked Akira. Those days had long since died in the face of mountains of experience.

"You're going to stay in a hotel for two weeks? Do you have any idea how expensive that is?" A man soon to be paying child support did, after all, need reminders of certain fiscal realities. He watched his rival pull on his jacket. "Why don't you stay with your parents?" This seemed like a far more reasonable option. Hikaru, however, stared at him as though he'd lost his reason.

"Oh sure, and have to listen to my mother's marital advice every moment of the day that I'm not working? Nah. I'll be fine." He smirked, but the real bitterness underlying it once again made Touya feel awkward – and consequently annoyed. He hated feeling inept at anything. Shindou slipped his feet into the ankle-high boots he'd been wearing. He sat on the step to tie them. "Anyway, thanks for the game. Wanna meet at your go salon tomorrow night for a rematch?" Touya nodded, then shook his head, returning to his earlier subject and not really sure why it mattered so much.

"Surely you have a friend who would put you up for such a short time."

His friend sighed in exasperation. "You offering?" Hikaru stared at him, daring, clearly hoping to simply shut him up. Akira shrugged.

"It's not like I use all the space in this house. My father had a lot more company than I generally care to entertain." He let his gaze wander as though, contrary to his statement, it was no big thing to have a house-guest. Hikaru was still staring at him, now in something like disbelief.

"You're serious." As if it were a revelation. Akira was becoming distinctly uncomfortable with the way his friend was staring at him.

"Look, do you want to stay or don't you? It's not like I care either way. It's just stupid to waste money on a hotel for two whole weeks when you've got friends and family all over the place." He gave his rival his best glare, but was disarmed when Hikaru abruptly dropped his gaze and chuckled.

"You realize we'll kill each other," he said, offering a way out, but obviously giving the idea serious consideration.

"It's only two weeks. I think after all this time I can tolerate you that long." His voice was icy. Even so, if he were honest with himself, he felt irrationally irritated already and half-wondered if Hikaru's seemingly unique ability to get under his skin could lead to anything but disaster. Then the green-eyed man looked up and smiled at him: cheerful, honest and grateful. Mollification was immediate.

"Thanks, Touya." There was a brief moment of awkwardness as each of them wondered what to do next. Then Shindou grinned. "But as long as I'm staying here, wanna have that rematch right now?"

"Get your things, as long as you've got your shoes on. I'll make some more tea." Shindou nodded and went to get his overnight bag from the motorcycle. Touya stared for a moment at the closed door. "It's only two weeks..."


	14. You haven't seen her

a/n: Just because it was fun to write.

**Part 14. You Haven't Seen Her**

Touya heard the door clack shut and his rival's whistling. He gritted his teeth, resolving not to yell at him. After all, the man was his guest. So what if he left discarded socks in the middle of the living room, had not put the goban away once since arriving and this morning had left a sink full of dirty dishes he'd promised last night to clean? So what if his very presence turned Touya's restful retreat from the world into a strangely uncomfortable landscape of alien music and unfamiliar papers and a toothbrush not his own on the sink in the hall bathroom? Civility to guests had been drilled into Touya at a very young age, and in all the years of helping his mother prepare for and then tidy up after his father's guests, he'd never faltered. Shindou, however, was pushing it.

"You're home?" The _guest_ had the nerve to look surprised. He was smiling broadly and had his headphones on, his head swaying ever so slightly in time to music Touya couldn't hear. His happiness was almost insulting, but at least his match must have gone well. His secretly fuming host went back to washing the dishes.

"This afternoon's lesson was canceled." He tried to keep his voice polite, for all that he hoped his posture radiated enough irritation to get his point across.

"Hey, what are you doing? I said I'd clean those!" The half-blond dropped his backpack on the floor, set his mp3 player and headphones on the kitchen ledge and made to move into the kitchen.

"When?" Touya asked, not relinquishing his place by the sink.

"Huh?"

"When were you going to clean them? Dinner was nineteen hours ago." He sighed, realizing that keeping track was probably childish and feeling resigned to the fact that his rival unerringly brought out the worst in him. "In any case, I'm almost finished. Would you please not leave your backpack in the hallway today?" He could practically feel Shindou's confusion and annoyance, but he heard the man pick up his bag. _One week and three days..._

"Fine, but leave the drying for me. I'll be right back." Touya heard him head back to the guest room. It was odd hearing noises in the house. He remembered spending a heart pounding half hour trying to go back to sleep the night before after hearing someone open his front door at one o'clock in the morning only to realize it was just his guest returning from a study session. He almost wondered if Shindou was louder than usual at night, but set the thought aside. Shindou was never quiet. He finished the last dish just in time for the man's return. "Move it. I'm drying."

Touya shrugged, moved, and watched his rival stare blankly at the dishes for a moment before beginning to look around the small kitchen. "The dish towel is hanging on the hook right in front of you," he snapped. Shindou smiled, grabbing it as though no hint of insult had colored his host's words. He began boisterously wiping away, while Touya tried not to fidget in concern for his mother's china.

"I beat Ochi today," Shindou offered. Touya decided it would probably be rude to return to the book he'd been reading, and instead pulled up one of the stools beside the kitchen counter.

"Was it a good game?" This was a standard question between them which usually translated out to 'please recite the interesting portions of the kifu to me'. They fell into a familiar discussion of Ochi's tactics and habits and for a while, Touya could overlook the inconvenience of sharing space with someone else. Shindou was actually pretty good at drying dishes.

"He went straight to the bathroom afterwards, though," the man continued. "That hasn't changed since he was an insei." The word sparked a memory, and Touya sat up a little.

"Shindou, have you considered sponsoring your daughter into the insei program?" If he hadn't been watching closely, he would not have seen his friend's back stiffen. Shindou relaxed again almost immediately before replying in an offhand way.

"Kinume? She doesn't play go." Shindou's rival sat back in surprise. Not only was it a patently ridiculous statement coming from the title-holding champion who had lost to her; it was exactly what the daughter in question had predicted her father would say. Not that he'd mentioned the insei program to her, but he had asked why they couldn't simply inform her father of her ability.

"She beat you." His incredulity was clear.

"It was a fluke." Something was making Shindou uncomfortable in a way Touya was very familiar with. He decided not to back down.

"A fluke! Beginners' luck doesn't exist in go."

"Well, it does in my family!" Shindou looked somewhere between angry and amused. Then Touya met his gaze and gave what he hoped looked like a knowing nod. He was rewarded by a tinge of very old terror in his rival's eyes.

"The same way you defeated me the first time we met?" Touya managed to keep the excitement out of his voice. He knew Kinume and knew there was nothing miraculous in her play. He would truthfully have been perfectly willing to believe she'd somehow had a momentary inspiration, but Shindou's reactions had him once again hoping for clues of Sai. Had his rival shared the secret with his daughter?

"No," Shindou tried to laugh it off. "Kinume's just really good at strategy. She's got good instincts, you know?" Touya could see the nervousness building and decided not to press any further. Shindou didn't run away physically anymore, but holing up and declining to talk to anyone for a while (i.e. sulking) was not unheard of. The tutor decided to follow up on his earlier interest in his student.

"All the more reason you should consider at least letting her try out." He watched Hikaru relax and saw the comfortable, competitive edge of an oncoming argument reassert itself in his eyes.

"She's a chess player, Touya. It's what she lives for. She'd never give it up for go – even if she did know how to play." He laughed, clearly remembering something. "She doesn't care about the hand of god; killing kings until there aren't any challengers left is what she's all about." Inwardly, Touya somehow doubted that.

"She could be a very positive influence to the game. If she were matched against worthy opponents-" Shindou had folded the dish towel and was hanging it back up when he interrupted.

"Have you ever seen her play?" Touya hesitated, unsure of how to answer, but Shindou continued. "Chess, I mean. Have you seen her play chess?" He shook his head.

"Come on then," and Shindou was leaving the kitchen and heading for the entryway. Bemused, Touya followed.

"Ah, what are you...?" Shindou was already shrugging into his jacket, and motioned for Touya to do the same.

"It's Akari's turn tonight, but what the hell. I'm taking you to see Kinume do what she does best."

-

The match had apparently been going on for some time by the time Shindou and Touya arrived. Most of the other participants had long since left the community center where it was being held, gone with their parents or mentors to discuss defeats. Even so, there was a decent crowd of parents and youngsters still clustered around the last game of the tournament. Kinume faced a plump boy with sandy hair and blue eyes across the checkered board. A clutch of fallen soldiers rested by each opponent's elbow.

Shindou pushed through the spectators to stand where he could easily see the board, dragging Touya with him. Everyone was maintaining the standard three feet of distance, but clearly pressed as close to that limit as possible. Touya noticed Akari directly to Shindou's right. She saw them, and smiled slightly, making a little more room before returning her attention to the game.

Touya followed her lead, but was immediately reminded of his incomprehension of this game. He had played chess a few times, but not enough to truly understand it. The battle on this board was merely black and white. A few more white pieces than black remained, but he didn't know whether that meant anything. He looked at Shindou for some clue, but the blank-yet-attentive look on his rival's face was enough to tell him Shindou didn't really know either. Instead, he focused on the players.

Kinume's eyes held a familiar intensity. The deep fires of competition clearly burned as brightly for chess as for go. What was unusual was the almost exuberant playfulness in her smile. She was enjoying herself tremendously. Her fingers, when they touched her soldiers, lingered in an almost loving caress and she placed each with the delicacy of a conductor flitting his baton. Her lips moved as she played, but no sound emerged. It was almost as though she were talking to someone, but her opponent never answered – it wasn't him.

Touya did not have to ask who was winning. The sandy-haired boy's shoulders already had the infinitesimal slump of defeat. Even so, he appreciated Shindou's consideration when the man turned to whisper in his ear.

"According to Akari, Kinume has mate in four." Touya nodded, faintly amused that Shindou had had to learn this from his wife.

Ten minutes (and four moves) later, it was over. The fallen king lay on the board and the contestants shook hands. Kinume said something in a language Touya didn't recognize, and her opponent smiled slightly.

"Have fun in China, Shindou-san," said the boy, and she smiled a polite, demure smile that made the watching parents proud. Then the children were leaving their game, and Kinume was surrounded by friends and some older people all congratulating her. Akari and Hikaru waited at a slight distance, holding some whispered conversation. Akari seemed happy and Hikaru wasn't frowning, so Akira decided to listen to Kinume's well wishers instead.

"Excellent game, Shindou-san!" An older man with greying hair and the sort of out-of-date suit Touya had come to associate with professional game-players was congratulating the girl. "You're still relying a bit heavily on your knights, but it worked well for you this time." Kinume blushed prettily, and Touya wondered if she had somehow been replaced by an identical twin with an alternate personality. She'd never taken criticism gracefully in his experience.

"But the knights are my favorite, Nozuki-sensei," and she fingered her horse-headed earrings. As she did it, she caught sight of Touya and her smile lost its ladylike quality, splitting her face in excitement. "TOUYA-SAN!" He found himself the sudden, uncomfortable center of attention as she introduced her teacher. "Nozuki Yota-sensei, this is my friend Touya Akira-san. He's my father's rival."

"Ah yes, the famous go player. I've heard a lot about you," the old man smiled, with a slight nod to Kinume. "A pleasure," he bowed. Touya returned it, mumbling something similar. Then the teacher momentarily reclaimed his student's attention. "Shindou-san, please be certain to have your mother call me to solidify the travel arrangements. We wouldn't want you to miss this chance through any forgetfulness, would we?" She nodded her agreement, he smiled and moved to join another conversation. Then Kinume returned her attention to Touya.

"You came to watch me?" At his nod, her grin widened. "What did you think?" she asked eagerly.

"Well," he tried to think of something appropriate to say, but was interrupted by Shindou's intrusion into the conversation.

"You did GREAT!" He beamed, with only the briefest smirk at his rival's obvious ignorance.

"Not that you'd know," she teased her father. Akari came up behind her daughter to give her a sedate hug.

"It was a very impressive game," her mother reassured her. Kinume laughed and turned to her mother.

"Did you see him fall for that sacrifice with the queen? I mean, come on. Like I would ever give her up for nothing, but then when he castled I thought I was in trouble until..." She went on animatedly reviewing the game to Akari and the older woman smiled over her daughter's back at her husband.

"I'm going to take her home. Would you like to come for tea?" There was the slightest strain to the moment as the child paused in her narration to see her father's response. Hikaru smiled at her, but shook his head.

"Can't. I'm studying with Touya tonight, but thank you. Maybe tomorrow." Akari nodded and Kinume shrugged.

"But Touya-san, you will watch me play again some time, won't you?" Her eyes held a spark of amusement at their shared secret and the hint of double meaning.

"Of course," he replied, letting her know he knew exactly what she was thinking. It probably _was_ time for her to move up to two stones...

The two pairs exited the community center, separating in the parking lot. Hikaru kissed his daughter once, despite her protests, and grinned cheerfully. Akari smiled indulgently at them both before thanking Touya, rather formally, for coming. Happy faces were maintained all around until the car door closed.

"So we're studying tonight?" Akira inquired. He watched his friend's face fall as the man stared out the car window just a moment longer.

"You see why it has to be chess, right?" Hikaru's voice seemed a little lower than usual. "She loves it so much." His face was still turned away. "It won't ask her for anything she can't give."

Akira thought about it for a moment. He remembered the fierce joy in the girl's eyes as she commanded plastic armies across the checkered wasteland. Then he remembered the way she came relentlessly, rain or shine, early or late or right on time to play _another_ game – a game she almost never won. Looking at her father's face, he began to understand.

"You haven't seen her play," he murmured.

For a moment their eyes met in the darkened interior of the car; a deep, challenging stare that dared them both to confess their secrets. Then Hikaru was looking past him out the windshield and suggesting that they stop for ramen on the way back to Touya's, and Akira was informing him that they were going straight back to study, lest he be proved a liar. Hikaru coaxed and Akira snarled and they argued all the way to the noodle shop.


	15. Good Intentions

a/n: Hmm... where did this chapter come from? Well, it's because there are two clichés very common in this fandom, upon which I felt the need to comment. Also, it is Valentine's Day. This makes me think of love; true, false and just plain unrequited.

**Part 15. Good Intentions**

"What _exactly_ are your intentions with my daughter?"

Several other patrons of the go salon looked over at the sound of the man's voice, raising eyebrows while quickly attempting to conceal their interest. Touya looked up from the game he'd been studying. He'd been waiting for almost an hour, and beginning to wonder what could be keeping Shindou, when at last the man arrived. _And this is all he has to say..._

Pointedly refusing to dignify the question with a response, the salon owner calmly began putting away the stones. He doubted there was any way to avoid this conversation, but he was not about to have it here.

"And don't pretend there's nothing going on!" Shindou was clearly past caring about propriety. His rival quickened his pace, scooping the stones away by handfuls as the irate father continued. "First she says you're her friend. Then I start finding her hair ties in your bathroom drawers. And now her mother tells me she's been coming home late from school and matches and her friends say she's seeing an older man. If I find out it's you I swear I'm going to-" Touya put the lid on the second go ke and stood, walking past Shindou and out the front door. He heard footsteps storming along behind him, but at least he'd managed to prevent his friend from airing any more supposed dirty laundry in his place of business.

"Where do you think you're going?" Shindou had caught up to him.

"Even you couldn't want to slander your daughter in front of a room full of our fans and acquaintances, Shindou." He was actually rather pleased how steadily he managed to form the words. He was getting much better at holding to the better part of valor and not strangling his rival. Now if he could only find somewhere more appropriate to have this discussion...

"Slander? So you're denying it?"

Privacy was a rare and valuable commodity in Tokyo, so Touya opted for his car. Reaching the garage, he clicked the remote lock and followed the beep to the automobile.

"Hey! I'm talking to you!" Shindou grabbed his rival's arm, which in itself said a thing or five about his anger. "Are you _denying_ that you've been seeing my daughter?" he practically yelled in the younger man's face.

"NO! But it's nothing like what you're implying, Shindou." He felt his cheeks growing warm with rage. For all that he could guess where some of his friend's assumptions might have come from, it didn't make being practically accused of pedophilia any more palatable. His mild irritation at the whole situation had become a bitterly painful anger at the thought his rival could so misunderstand him. Some part of his mind still tried to stay above it all, but the hurt won out. "How you could even think that I would ever harbor inappropriate thoughts towards a thirteen-year-old..." Words failed him and he pulled his arm away, pointedly reaching for the car door. "If you have that little respect for me, this conversation is _over_."

They stared at each other over the top of the half open door. Then Shindou sighed, deflating slightly. "I do respect you, Touya." He looked away. "It's just... she's my daughter." _And she's a teenager and a handful and driving her mother and I up a wall_ was clearly outlined in the tired, irritated anxiety in Shindou's eyes.

"And it shows," agreed the mollified Akira. That earned him a glare, but the bleach-banged man made no move to deny it. "If you think you can be civil, we can discuss this in the car." His tone clearly indicated his doubt that this was possible, but it was also a bit of an old joke from their days of fighting in the salon. The olive branch hung between them.

"Fine," Hikaru agreed. Akira gestured to the passenger door, and his friend climbed in. When they'd both fastened their seatbelts, the driver started the engine and made his way into the anonymity of traffic.

"So, will you please tell me what brought all this on?" Determining exactly what Hikaru knew would help avoid any further misunderstandings. And too, his calmly rational demeanor seemed to have a pacifying effect on his rival.

"I stopped by home to check up on Akari, see how she was doing and we got to talking about Kinume." Akira wondered for the thousandth time why it was his friend still referred to that house as home when he'd been living in the Touya guest room for almost seven months. Not that the latter was entirely his fault. Touya had somehow forgotten to pass on a message from the realtor while Shindou was in China, and the apartment had fallen through. Since his return, the homeless man had been too busy to seek a new place. His host hadn't pressed.

"That's when Akari told you she believes your daughter is seeing someone?" He saw the slight nod of blond bangs at the edge of his field of vision. "And you assumed it was me?"

"Well, I keep finding her stuff in the house." There was defensiveness, but also a clear demand for explanations. Akira obliged.

"Most of which she leaves during visits to _her father_."

"And then that one time, I caught you hugging her in the kitchen," he retorted. They'd had this argument before.

"I wasn't hugging her: I was catching her. I told you she fell off the footstool. Would you prefer it if I'd let her hit the ground? Your daughter is fatally accident prone." His voice stayed calm, but his knuckles did get a little white on the steering wheel. It was tremendously irritating having the same fight over and over again.

"Yeah, well today when I got back from Akari's I found _my_ daughter curled up on _your_ futon. Are you going to tell me she just tripped and wound up there?" Touya's eyes went wide and he turned to stare at Shindou. He accidentally turned the wheel as well and only his rival's quick reflexes kept them from running into a row of parking meters.

"ARE YOU TRYING TO GET US KILLED!"

"Kinume was on _my_ futon!" The words said in unison were unintelligible.

"Geez, Touya. Pull over, if you're going to drive like that. I guess you _didn't _know about it." They'd reached a municipal park and Touya decided that they had gone far enough. He parked, switched off the engine and for several moments, both men sat catching their breath in the wake of near-death adrenaline. A woman pushing a pram on the sidewalk beside the car cast a curious look in their direction, as did a little boy on a skateboard a few minutes later. The car's occupants were oblivious.

"I still want to know why my daughter seems so at home at your place." But Hikaru sounded slightly more curious than upset.

"We're friends." The driver gestured to the door. His passenger shrugged and they made their way out into the little park.

"And that's it?" Hikaru never did know when to shut up. Akira sighed in exasperation and sat down at one end of a bench overlooking the park's small water garden.

"Look, your daughter is an attractive, intelligent young woman but she's twenty years younger than I am, the daughter of my rival and frankly not my type." Hikaru seemed to consider this and sat at the other end of the granite bench. Touya abruptly decided he'd had quite enough of secrets and might as well get all of the melodrama out of the way at once. Watching his rival out of the corner of his eye, he continued. "But she is an impressive go player." He noticed the familiar tension straightening his friend's spine and forged ahead. "I've been working with her in preparation for this summer's pro exams. We've been playing once or twice a week, lately." He looked to see whether his rival was listening to him. When the man finally looked at him, he finished with his trump card. "She has a very good chance of passing."

"She has a...?" For a moment he looked completely incredulous, and as if he might shout again. Then his eyes widened slightly and he looked away, the color draining from his face. "Does she win? Against you, I mean." Hikaru was staring fixedly at a rock in the middle of the artificial stream. He was suddenly quite pale and Akira wondered if Kinume's insistence on secrecy might have been more than a childish conceit. Regardless, it was too late to take it back now. He answered honestly.

"At three stones, she wins about five matches in seven. We play at two." He watched his rival closely.

"But she's never crushed you?" Shindou was serious. Touya bit back the scathing retort that the question deserved and instead simply shook his head.

"She's good, but not that good. She tends to lose patience and be more interested in capturing stones than she should." He wondered where this was headed.

"I wonder if he even asks to play..." Hikaru murmured, then shook his head, seeming to return from whatever realm the rock had occupied. He noticed his friend watching him and grinned, hiding his thoughts beneath his usual sunny demeanor. "I should take her to one of Morishita-san's study sessions some time. If she can play you at two stones she'd surprise the hell out of Waya," he paused, thinking of something. "Of course, she still has matches Friday nights, so it might be a little tricky getting her there. She'll never miss a chance to play Piotr..." He seemed to get lost in thoughts of springing his daughter on his friends and Touya relaxed a little. At least he wasn't going to go on another one of his cryptic vacations to Hiroshima. Then he saw him frown. "That still doesn't explain what she was doing on your futon." He turned a steadfast gaze on the man at the other end of the bench who in turn tried to think of any reason she might possibly have been there. Drawing a blank, he returned with a question.

"What did she say when you asked her?" Hikaru looked somewhat chagrined as he answered.

"I didn't wake her up." At his rival's raised eyebrows, he quickly became defensive. "Well, she doesn't sleep as much as she should."

"You _are_ insane," Touya decided, albeit not for the first time. "In any case, I am sure there is some sort of explanation. Probably not a rational one, since she is a Shindou," he casually added, allowing himself a slight internal smile at his friend's scowl. "Shall we go ask her what she was doing?" He stood, indicating the car with a tilt of his head. "If you left her sleeping, she's probably still there."

"Yeah." Shindou stood and stretched, shrugging the last of the tension from his shoulders in a gesture his rival had noticed after countless games. They made their way back to the car and were driving towards the house when the emotionally exhausted father remembered an evening tutoring appointment. "Damn. I'm gonna be late! Could you...?"

"I'll drop you off," the driver sighed. Then his eyes lit with well-disguised amusement, "provided, of course, that you trust me alone in the house with your daughter." After a split-second's poorly concealed shock, Hikaru managed a laugh.

"Sure, fine. I trust you." He grinned. "Hell, you're probably more innocent than she is." He was rewarded by his rival's blush and glare, but the silence in the car for the rest of the trip was a comfortable one.

-

The house was quiet and dark when Touya finally returned. He noticed his house guest had once again left his backpack in the front hallway, and had not put his usual empty juice can into the recycling bin. Kinume had left a game or perhaps only part of one set up on the goban in the living room, but Touya resisted the urge to analyze it. Instead he made his way back to his room. 

Kinume was indeed fast asleep on his futon, but the sheets of paper scattered around her and on the floor beside made it obvious what she'd been doing. The girl liked to read kifu by spreading them out all over her reading area – he'd never quite understood why – and as such preferred futons to chairs or couches. Considering her father's was probably also covered in papers, it made a certain sense she'd chosen Touya's on which to study. Today's pages were all taken from insei matches, and he guessed she'd been researching the competition.

He flicked on the light switch and the girl grumbled in her sleep. Moving to hide her face from the light, she caused a cascade of her long, purple hair to fall aside revealing a small, leather-bound notebook. Touya froze. Of course, it was only a kifu notebook. And there was a slight chance Kinume wouldn't know what she'd found. He cleared his throat, caught somewhere between annoyance and nervousness.

"Kinume. Wake up." At first she only groaned and pulled a sheaf of papers over her head, but the second time, she made it all the way to consciousness. Sitting up and throwing back her hair, she saw who'd called and smiled brightly.

"Touya-san!" At which point she seemed to notice where she was, and an oddly appropriate blush colored her cheeks. "I must have fallen asleep. I'm sorry." She sounded contrite, but her eyes sparkled. Then she began gathering the pages. "I was studying up for the test, you know. I figured I'm going to have to be able to win every match I play, since chess might make me miss one or two."

"Wanting to win them all is a good goal, but unrealistic." He began helping her collect the sheets. "A casual attitude can be fatal, and it is furthermore unfair to your opponents. Even with your skill, you really cannot afford to miss any of the games. While your father did manage to come back from two losses, you can hardly expect to do... the... same."

Kinume had set down her stack of loose pages and was holding the notebook. She had clearly waited for him to look up, and when he did her piercing gaze seemed far older than the thirteen years she'd lived. He wondered how he could ever have hoped she'd overlook the careful notations, or god help him, the margin notes of every game her father had ever played against his rival.

"There was one thing, though." Her eyes held a depth of perception he hadn't seen since his last serious match against Shindou, and his position suddenly felt every bit as precarious. When she spoke, her voice sounded casually curious, but her eyes' intensity never eased. "What _exactly_ are your intentions with my father?"


	16. Rivals' Reply

a/n: The denouement is never as fun as the escalation. That said, I think this came out well – if far too long. The cliché here is obvious enough that even those of you who've told me "I don't see it" should be able to pick it out – though I smile as I say this because it's such a very fun cliché at that. Incidentally, anyone who has questions about this or any of my writing (and more to the point would like responses) may address them to my board over at the proboards (link in my profile), since I'm not good about replying here.

**16. The Rivals' Reply**

_He hadn't known the answer. The mind so skilled at calculating responses of slate and shell spun frictionless on the clarity of her question. He'd found himself working very hard to keep his face expressionless and his knees from landing him flat on his face. For a moment, her hazel eyes had searched his with an openness that reminded him all too well of her father. The eyes asked almost kindly, but he'd been too shocked to speak. In the end, he'd done the one thing he'd told himself he would not do: he dismissed her question as that of a child. She had stared at him in disbelief, with a whisper of betrayal. Then she'd looked away._

_That had been two months ago. They hadn't spoken since._

-

Waya looked again at his fidgeting friend. The match wasn't scheduled to start for another hour and Shindou had opted to hang out in the hotel lounge rather than head straight to the room where it would be held. Waya had accompanied him, as he often did lately and proceeded to watch the man drink two cans of peach tea in quick succession. He was really glad he was only keeping time for this match.

"You sure you're going to be okay?" he asked. Shindou looked up and smiled rather grimly.

"One way or another, that bastard's going to stop ignoring me." He dropped another hundred yen in the vending machine and went for his third can of juice. Waya sighed. It had been like this for a while now.

He wasn't sure exactly what had happened between Shindou and Touya two months ago, but he did know that they'd had some sort of argument resulting in the latter kicking the former out of his house. He also knew that since then, the ice king had buried himself in a match schedule that would have killed any flesh-and-blood human, while Shindou had developed a rather insane habit of stalking him through formal matches and events. Furthermore, he'd had a lot more time to hang out with Waya, Isumi and his other friends from Insei days. Waya assumed it meant the rivals really weren't getting along. He didn't care about Touya, but something had to be done about Shindou or the man was going to drive everyone else nuts.

The deciding match for the Meijin title had come down to Shindou and Touya. Waya hoped it would settle things. It was widely known that this particular title held a special place in whatever passed for Touya's heart, and Shindou had been after it (out of competitive nature or sheer contrariness) for years. Unfortunately, the first three matches of the seven-game series to determine the winner had all been decidedly lackluster. Shindou had won them, and Touya had seemed strangely detached. Waya found himself hoping that the defending champion would pull himself together today, or Shindou was likely to snap.

"Um, you sure you want to be drinking like that right before the game?" At least it wasn't alcohol, but it would still be a little undignified if the challenger had to waste time on repeated bathroom breaks. Shindou just shrugged and continued sipping his third can. Waya tried for a distraction.

"So I hear Kinume's doing well with her chess, er, stuff." It sounded feeble even to him, but Waya figured anything would be better than letting Shindou seethe for another fifty minutes. Shindou rolled his eyes and Waya followed up. "Who's that guy she just played over in China? Mark Somethingorother?"

"Markovich. Piotr Markovich. I think she'd rather play him than breathe," the father sighed in exasperation that had nothing to do with today's game and his friend counted it a victory for the forces of good. "He beat her in Hong Kong, and now those two can't leave each other alone. They play on the internet. They mail each other chess moves on all kinds of crazy stationary. Akari caught her playing him long-distance over the phone three nights ago. Do you have any idea what a four hour phone call to Vladivostok costs?" Waya cringed in sympathy, but he couldn't help but be reminded that Kinume Shindou was unmistakably her father's daughter. Said father was still talking. "-if she could go to Russia this summer. Like I'm going to buy her 'plane tickets to go spend a month unchaperoned with some foreign boy three years older than she is. I mean whatever happened to trying for the pro exams? Then again, ever since she and Touya stopped talking..." The earlier look of grim single-mindedness returned with a vengeance and Waya gave up. Clearly all roads lead back to the damn Meijin title holder.

-

"Are you going to play today, or am I wasting my time again?" The gathered officials and spectators did their best to avert their eyes and stifle murmurs of surprise at the challenger's unconventional greeting. The champion ignored the insult and continued staring blankly at the goban, for all that his cheeks flushed slightly. "Fine. But I know for a fact that if your father's ghost is watching, he's severely disappointed right now." That earned him a glare full of genuine anger. It wasn't the exciting intensity of a real game face, but it was closer than he'd seen in the past month. He sat with a returning glare as the Judge began the recitation of the rules of the tournament.

The opening game went by in a flash, for all that it took almost two hours. Touya played with an elegant precision that had been missing lately and Shindou seemed hard pressed to take his time and consider his moves. For all that it was a title deciding match, it was also the first game he'd played with his rival in two months that looked even slightly normal. He'd obviously missed that. He'd clearly missed the energy and excitement of a good game against his favourite opponent, and watching them, Waya could see said opponent felt the same.

Touya was still slightly flushed, but his mouth was set in a familiar hard line. Sweat darkened the roots of his hair and his eyes burned. His pace was steady, if a little slow, but his attacks and responses were brilliant. This was no perfunctory placing of uninspired stones; it was a true contest. Even the spectators were impressed. This was the sort of play they'd waited for. This was what made Touya/Shindou matches so spectacular. Little smiles and murmurs of admiration occasionally escaped the audience's mouths, but it was clear the rivals were playing for each other today. Shindou was smiling.

It continued on that way for almost the entire day. Shindou did wind up spending more time than usual on trips to the restroom, and Touya tended to close his eyes during these pauses as though the strain of glaring non-stop at the stones were a bit much even for him. The spectators came and went a little less frequently than usual, afraid to miss some interesting play. Even Waya found himself enjoying the game, so it came as something of a shock to him when the title holder began to fall apart towards the end of the evening.

After watching Touya make his second poor move in a row, Waya took a quick look at Shindou. He expected him to look angry at this seeming return of his rival's sub-par performance. Instead, the challenger was scrutinizing his opponent's face with something that looked a lot like concern. He didn't do it for very long, and no one else seemed to notice anything amiss, but then the habitually unconventional go professional proceeded to sit back and let the clock run down on his move. It took nearly an hour, but finally the judge requested that the move be sealed for the night, and Shindou obliged.

Around the room, there was standing and stretching, but Touya didn't move until his rival abruptly walked over and tapped him on the shoulder. The man blinked as though he'd somehow fallen asleep with his eyes open, then stared at Shindou in apparent confusion. The latter offered him a hand and helped him to his feet.

"Well, that was a better game," he commented. Touya nodded still seeming slightly out of it while one of the officials and a pair of fans converged on the two. There would be no game discussion until the game was over, but invitations to dinner and such were offered readily. "Nah, Touya and I are going to go have a drink somewhere and see if we can psyche each other out before tomorrow," Shindou declined, smacking his rival on the back. Touya seemed to come to himself enough to go along with it, and the two headed out. Waya followed them as far as the lounge, where Shindou unceremoniously shoved Touya into a chair and twisted his head to catch his Insei friend's attention. His expression was grim; a complete inversion of the cheer he'd shown moments before.

"Hey Waya, would it be okay if we did dinner some other time? I'm taking Touya home." He was searching Touya's blazer pockets for something, finally standing up with a set of car keys in his hand. The other pro did not protest.

"Is he okay?" Waya peered curiously at the man, and suddenly noticed that the slight blush, sweat and glassy eyes looked like classic symptoms of a fever.

"Not enough to play, that's for sure. He'll be better off at home," he turned back to his now quite obviously ill friend, "Since you're too dumb to stay there in the first place when you're sick." He leaned down to pull him out of the chair, and wrapped one arm around his waist as a precaution. Touya scowled at this, but made no move to pull away. He seemed slightly delirious. "Anyway, I may be forfeiting tomorrow, so if anybody asks, I had a family emergency and Touya drove me home, okay?"

"Why the hell would you forfeit? If anything, he should. It's not like he stands a chance of defending the title." Why anyone would bend over backward to protect a snob like Touya was a mystery to Waya, but then, Shindou's actions were unfathomable as often as not.

"I just don't wanna win it this way, you know?" Well, that made sense at least. It sounded just like him, too. Waya sighed.

"Okay, I'll cover for you. And I'll even be nice about your friend's image, since you seem to care. Call me when you know for sure what you're doing about tomorrow, though, okay?"

"Will do. Thanks, Waya!" He smiled and Waya rolled his eyes, then checked the hallways to make sure they were clear as Shindou half-lead/ half-dragged his rival to the car.

-

Akira was quite surprised to discover himself in his own futon, dressed in pajamas with a washcloth on his forehead and something in his ear. He jerked away from this last only to feel his head held firmly to the pillow by a familiar hand.

"Hold still, will you? I'm just taking your temperature." The voice was familiar too.

"Shindou? What are you doing here?" He felt slightly panicky and wondered how much of it was the fever.

"Trying to take your temperature, like I said! If you'd just not move for thirty seconds. Geez, you're worse than Kinume when she was a baby." At that, Akira went still in silent contradiction of this statement. Several seconds later, there was a slight beep and Shindou let go of him, holding up the digital thermometer for inspection. "38.7. What the hell were you thinking?" But Akira was beginning to notice other details of his surroundings. Chief among them being the fact that they were not the last place he remembered being.

"The match?" He heard himself ask, while other portions of his brain pondered the dim lighting, the cool washcloth and the suit-clad man sitting inches away. Said man rolled his eyes and stood.

"Was great until I figured out you'd left the building." Hikaru sounded irritated, but it seemed a bit forced. From the futon, his friend heard him rummaging around in the medicine cabinet.

"I left the... what?" Nothing was making sense, he decided. Himself perhaps least of all. Hikaru reappeared abruptly bearing a glass of water and something closed in his fist. He resumed his seat beside the blankets' edge.

"You headed off to lala land." Noting Akira's blank look, he tried again. "You screwed up two moves royally, and didn't even notice when I made a crappy one myself. Do you even remember the end of the game?" He shook his head, noting how very light it felt. "Well, probably best not to. Anyway, I brought you home. I figured you'd be better off here and wouldn't try to do anything stupid like play tomorrow." He set the glass and two tablets on the nightstand, then grabbed a couple throw pillows which should have been on the couch in the living room. "Sit up. Now that you're lucid, I want you to take some aspirin."

Finding nothing wrong with that idea, the feverish man dragged himself into a sitting position. Strange that his limbs could feel so heavy when his head felt as though it might float away. As he moved, the blankets fell from his shoulders, and he shivered in the sudden chill. Hikaru stuffed the throw pillows behind him, propping him up, then wrapped another blanket around his shoulders. He deftly saved the sheets from the washcloth, which had fallen, replacing it in the water basin on the nightstand. Then he offered his friend the pills and glass.

"How did the game end?" Even as the room swirled, this detail stuck in Akira's mind as blindingly important. His rival seemed to understand.

"I let the clock burn an hour, then sealed a move and got you out of there. There's no way you'll be up for playing tomorrow, so I called in a forfeit. Our next game is in six days. That should be plenty of time for you to get better." He returned his attention to the items in his hands. "Drink, or I force them down your throat."

Akira nodded with strange complacency before placing the pills on his tongue and taking the glass to wash them down. His hand shook, and Hikaru was quick to steady the bottom lest he douse himself. He still choked a little trying to swallow. "Wait, if I forfeit, even for illness, I'll-"

"_I _forfeited. I want the title, but not because your stupid pride made you play me when you were half dead." He pushed the glass up to Akira's lips a second time, and the latter obligingly finished it.

"I'm sorry I inconvenienced you." He watched bemusedly as his rival took the glass and went to fill it again.

"Yeah, well, you owe me a game. A real one. Our next match had better knock my socks off, or I'm going to have to find another rival." Akira stared at him with unusually honest horror and he quickly laughed to prove he'd been joking. Pausing to set the refilled glass on the nightstand, he sat, wrung out the washcloth and pushed back his friend's bangs to wipe his forehead and face gently. "Seriously, though... what's up with you lately?"

Hikaru was wearing his concerned look and Akira decided he really didn't want to see it. He could hardly explain his actions of the past two months to himself, let alone his rival. Even considering the question left him desperately tired. He closed his eyes, and gave the simple answer.

"I seem to have a bit of a cold I can't get over." For a long moment, he could feel the weight of his friend's stare, but the man didn't pursue it.

"Oh. Well, you're probably just working too hard." Hikaru's tone was brisk, and Akira heard him stand again, then walk away down the hall. He wondered if he were leaving and felt wrenchingly sad at the thought. His eyes felt warm and watery and he was considering curling up in his blankets and trying to sleep when he heard the soft sound of something small landing on his lap. Glancing at the blankets, he discovered a purple hair tie. "You might wanna keep your hair off your neck. You'll cool down faster that way," his friend suggested. Seeing the sick man's confusion, he took the small, stretchy circle, grabbed Akira's hair and within moments had gathered the one into the other forming a rakish topknot. "It's not pretty, but you look like hell anyway, so..." He paused, looking at his watch. "You should try to get some sleep."

"When did you turn into such a nurse?" quipped Akira, who suddenly wanted his friend to keep talking.

"Thirteen years of fatherhood will do that to you. Although you're a much better patient than she is." He yawned, closing his eyes as he did so, before leaning back against the nightstand. There was something very weary in the posture, but also something almost painfully independent. For all that he was sure it was the fever shoving words into his mouth, the patient spoke again.

"I'm sorry."

"I told you not to worry about it. I'm used to-"

"For making you leave."

Tired green eyes met fever-bright ones and for what felt like a year, neither spoke. At last, it was Hikaru who ended the silence, but with none of his usual flippancy.

"It's okay. You needed your space," he said quietly. Then he grinned with a hint of irony. "Not to mention I was going insane trying to keep things as clean as you do. We made lousy roommates."

"I didn't really mind-" Akira began, but Hikaru stared him into honesty. He smiled. "Well, perhaps you were a bit noisy to live with. And your understanding of household chores leaves much to be desired, and honestly, it's not healthy to cook ramen that many evenings a week. Your mother-" But as he'd been talking, his friend had been wringing out and re-moistening the washcloth. He dropped it a hair too exuberantly on the invalid's face.

"Shut up before you say something stupid, Touya." The younger man adjusted the washcloth enough to glare at this, but in a rare show of obedience, remained silent. "I found a place easy enough, and I'm doing just fine. The only thing that pissed me off was when you stopped playing like you meant it. I guess you were probably just sick, and too stubborn to admit it, but I was starting to worry. I've become an amazing go player, but even I can't play both sides," he paused, a strangely wistful smile curving his lips while it clouded his eyes. "At least, not anymore..."

"Shindou?" Akira let the question linger in his gaze. As expected, his rival chose to ignore it. Someday was apparently not today. Then again, it was probably for the best.

"Sorry. I'm getting tired. If I get much worse, I won't be able to drive," he smirked. "Speaking of which, Akari's coming to pick me up so I can go get my bike. Your mom is on her way up from Osaka and K-chan's going to stay here until she comes. If your temperature gets any higher, she's under orders to take you to the emergency room, so be sure to drink plenty of water."

"How is Kinume-san?" Akira tried to stifle a yawn, but failed. Shindou began shifting pillows and blankets around to help him lie back down.

"Obsessed. We can't keep her away from the chess board. Everything is Piotr this and Piotr that. I swear we have to remind her to eat," he paused for a yawn of his own. "Akari thinks K-chan's in love, but I think it's rivalry. I mean, he's all she ever talks about but when the two of them talk to each other, they fight like cats and dogs. And they play each other like the fate of the world depended on it. If that's not rivalry, I don't know what is." He pulled the blankets up to tuck snugly around the patient with the efficiency of long practice.

"Well, rivalry _is_ better than love," murmured Akira, softly. His eyes were closed and he was at least half asleep. Hikaru stared at him for a long moment as his friend's breathing became steady and deep, gone to Morpheus' realm.

"Yeah. As long as your rival keeps playing," he smirked.

-

_In his dream, the answer finally came. _

"_I am going to be his rival, Kinume-san. We set out to touch the hand of god, and until that day comes, there is nothing to do but play. He'll give me the very best of his go, and I will give him mine." He said it with calm confidence, smiling a little at the girl. They stood beside the waters of the duck pond and the tendrils of her purple hair danced in the breeze. She turned to look at him, ancient wisdom in a childlike face._

"_And your love?" she asked with a gentle affection._

"_Will stay within the stones." It felt right, saying it aloud, if only in a dream. The strange Kinume seemed to understand._

"_It is a fun game, isn't it?" she replied, her eyes dancing. Then she picked up a bamboo flute and the melody enchanted him down into dreamlessness. _


	17. The Talk

a/n: I'm sorry about this. Really. It's goofy and fluffy and such, but sometimes so is life. Anyway, this should clarify a few of the questions I've been posed recently. Hope you like it.

**Part 17. The Talk**

"_Your mother says she caught you kissing Piotr in the convention center lobby after the match yesterday."_

"_He's European. They kiss to say hello."_

"_After the match?"_

"_And goodbye!"_

"_On the MOUTH?"_

"_SOMETIMES!"_

"_There is no way you are allowed to date some foreign boy three years older than you. He's practically in college, and you are far too young to-"_

"_He's my RIVAL!"_

"_Yeah, well, Touya's _my _rival but you don't see me kissing _him_!"_

"_Maybe you should try it sometime. The results might surprise you..."_

"_YOU ARE GROUNDED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE!"_

_-_

"She's driving me insane." Shindou sat across from Touya at their usual board in the salon. "I mean, what's a fourteen-year-old girl doing kissing boys anyway?"

"You'd rather she were kissing girls?" Touya let a hint of wry amusement color his words as he looked at the papers prepared by his accountant. The salon was doing quite well, unsurprisingly, and his investments were coming back nicely.

"I'd rather she weren't kissing anybody. I mean, she's just a kid. She shouldn't be trying to grow up so fast." He sighed and threw his head back in exasperation.

"You're teaching her to play games for a living – I hardly think you need to worry about her growing up too fast." He made a few notations on items to discuss at the next meeting.

"I'm not teaching her anything," grumbled the errant maiden's father in the direction of the ceiling. "She's got a coach for chess and you for go. She hardly even talks to me anymore."

"According to my mother, all teenagers go through that phase. You can't let it bother you." He shuffled the papers into a neat stack and stood to return them to his briefcase. For a moment, he felt the now-familiar weakness and paused, resting his hand on the goban for stability.

"Touya? Are you okay?" His recovery from what turned out to be a rather nasty virus and several bacterial secondary infections had taken over a month, half of which had been spent in hospital. With the aid of massive doses of antibiotics and bed rest, Touya had managed to finish the Meijin Tournament. He'd defended his title admirably in the second half, but three months after the fact, his health had yet to fully return. Even so, it _was_ improving, and Shindou's continued concern had long since become irritating.

"I'm fine. I'm just going to put these away and then we can play." He set a single black stone on the grid. "Nigiri. I'll be right back." So saying, he headed back to the office to file away the papers, leaving post-it notes on the ones he meant to act on. It was high time Ishikawa received another raise, certain remodeling items were due for consideration, and the lease was up for renegotiation. He wished all his work could be as rewarding as playing go, but the thought of hiring a business manager when he was still perfectly capable of attending to things for himself rankled. At least Shindou's troubles were soothingly simple. He was smiling when he returned to the board.

"I'm white," the man announced as his rival nodded and sat. Touya opened with the tengen, just to amuse them both, and watched Hikaru grinningly respond with a more traditional star point.

"So are you going to cancel her trip to Russia?" Touya floated the question lightly over his next move. He wondered how Hikaru would respond to the combination of an unusual opening and distracting conversation.

"No. I can't do that. I guess this seminar thing is very prestigious, and her coach says it will really help her game. I just wish _he_ wasn't going to be there." That move would undoubtedly leave a dent in the board. Touya wondered whether he should consider getting a new one for this location. Then again, nothing short of steel would hold up unblemished against their regular conversations here. Perhaps it was just as well that the regular patrons generally avoided this corner.

"He seems nice enough," he commented, continuing with the opening game. Admittedly, Touya had only met his student's rival in passing, generally picking up or dropping of the younger Shindou. Kinume's long-running monologues on the subject, however, described a studious, well-mannered chess player with no real interests beyond the game. He did not seem to be a real danger. As Russia's greatest prodigy in a decade, he had a reputation to uphold if nothing else.

"Maybe, but I don't like the way he looks at her." Touya decided that laughing out loud probably _would_ be overdoing it. Shindou had to know how utterly childish he sounded.

"When they're playing?" he asked. Shindou nodded.

"He gets this look like... I don't know," he placed his next move somewhat absent-mindedly. "Like he's..."

"Passionately interested?" That last move had been a mistake and Touya pounced on it by way of a warning. He saw Shindou become abruptly aware of his peril and watched the familiar intensity light up his eyes. "Perhaps you should try looking in a mirror when you're playing some time."

For several minutes, Shindou was silent, giving this game due consideration. Then he sat back, relaxing slightly and placed his response. Touya noted with satisfaction that it was a considerably better move. They continued the opening at a slightly quicker pace for several hands, until Shindou looked up.

"Playing your rival can be pretty intense, but there's passion and then there's passion, you know?" He played an odd foray into an unoccupied section of the board.

"You're seeing things that aren't there," Touya replied, mostly wondering what his rival was up to with this new gambit. "From what I've seen of him, he's completely devoted to the game."

"He's seventeen." Shindou said it as if that one fact could explain everything. Touya decided on an approach and played it as he answered.

"And that has precisely _what _to do with anything?" Shindou toyed with the stones in his go ke for a moment before playing.

"Well, I was seventeen, you know?" His tone was slightly plaintive, but his play was confident.

Touya laughed. "In some ways you still are." Shindou was still glaring at him as Ishikawa stopped by to offer them tea. The owner accepted his with usual politeness and Shindou followed his lead. They'd long since left behind the days of allowing their little squabbles to translate into rudeness toward the staff. Even so, it was almost comical how the glare returned the moment the hostess left.

"That's not what I meant." Touya arched an eyebrow in a silent request for elaboration. Shindou blushed slightly. "I was seventeen the first time I..."

"Oh," Touya interrupted, deciding that some elaborations were best left unsaid. They played several brisk hands and the game took on a delightful intricacy. It was easy to let the conversation lapse beneath the familiar fascination of conflicting strategies. Even so, as the patterns and battles became increasingly complex, the speed of responses inevitably slowed. In one of these pauses, Touya picked their dialog back up.

"You realize, not all seventeen-year-olds think alike. And even if he were interested, it's not as though your daughter would do anything untoward. She's very strong willed on the subject of love." Somehow, Shindou had manipulated the game into a six moku disadvantage for his rival, and studying the board, Touya was hard pressed to read a solution. If nothing else, awkward conversations bought him time.

"She's strong willed, but he's her rival. She chases him, follows his lead. She'd do almost anything to keep playing him." This thought clearly distracted Shindou enough to give his rival however much time he wanted.

"You think he'd withhold his play until she slept with him?" Should he attempt to strengthen his advantage in the center?

"Well, no, but if he asked her to sleep with him, she might just go along with it because of who he is..." Shindou's eyes darkened at this thought.

"Because he's her rival and she respects his opinions?" Perhaps a better strategy would be to concentrate on finishing the battle in the lower left...

"Something like that." Now Shindou was also concentrating on the goban. He'd clearly noticed that Touya was stalling, and his eyes were lightening with competitive smugness.

"So if I asked you to sleep with me, you'd do it?" Aha! A pincer move here and the game would soon be even again. Touya smiled and placed the stone only to look up into his rival's shocked stare. His words came back to him and he willed himself not to blush. Instead, he put on his most rational countenance. "You see how patently ridiculous your line of reasoning is, now, don't you?"

"Um. Yeah. I guess so." He still seemed slightly shaken somehow, but managed to laugh. "Still, you're a guy and we're both old enough to know better. It's different with K-chan."

"So you mean to tell me that if I were a woman and we were seventeen your virtue would be in danger?" For one dreadfully uneasy moment they both seemed almost to consider this. Then Touya gave what he hoped was an exasperated sigh and narrowed his eyes. "Really, Shindou. You're worrying too much about Kinume. While you're probably right that she and her rival are very close, that's hardly reason to suspect anything inappropriate." It was amazing how easily annoyance could supersede all traces of embarrassment. He picked up a stone, only to realize it was still Shindou's turn. Feeling the comforting safety of increased irritation, he gestured to his opponent's coffer. "Are you going to play?"

Shindou replaced his disconcerted expression with a far more familiar glare and slammed a stone down. His rival responded immediately with the move he'd planned earlier, and goaded by this speed, the blond-banged man returned an equally quick reply. "I just don't want her to get hurt," he protested. Touya sighed, but inwardly sympathized.

"Look, Kinume is a very intelligent young woman, but she is also quite strong willed. At some point you're going to have to trust her to make decisions for herself." The young father bristled slightly at this, but his friend was quick to temper it. "Still, I really think she's a little young yet to even be considering the things you're worried about. And even if she is, I'm sure your wife has talked to her about it." Noting Hikaru's slightly dubious expression, he continued cautiously. "She has talked to her about it, right?" He placed his move without looking, suddenly a little more worried about the conversation.

"About what?" Shindou likewise placed a move to which neither of them payed much attention.

"You know..." He glued his eyes to the board, hoping Shindou would acknowledge what they were talking about without requiring it be spelled out. He noticed the lackluster nature of the past hand and did his best to shore it up with a carefully placed hane.

"Know?" Shindou could be denser than lead some times. Touya watched him place another less-than-ideal stone before giving a sigh of frustration.

"To put it frankly: sex. Surely by now your wife has discussed these matters with Kinume and any choices she makes will be well informed, right?"

"Um, probably?" At this, Touya dropped his stone on the board, and they both stared at it. Their standard rule was that such things counted, but it was certainly not the placement he had intended. They were almost finished with the endgame, by this point, and so they played it out. As it drew to an eerily unavoidable draw, the rivals stared at each other.

"Well, hopefully they'll just concentrate on their game," Touya offered, eyes fixed on his rival's. Shindou swallowed hard and nodded.

"They'd better."


	18. Sound and Fury

a/n: Call this the deliberately out of character, blatant fanservice (okay, to one specific fan), utter drivel written whilst in the throws of writer's block. My sincerest apologies. The next chapter will be back to theme.

**Part 18. The Sound and the Fury**

"_hhssslck_." Ordinarily during a game, Touya Akira was oblivious to all sounds. "_hhssslck_." The rustlings and stone shuffling and sneezes and sighs of his fellow players never reached his ears. "_hhssslck_." He had on occasion even played matches at the nursing home where he taught twice a month. The murmurs and wheezes and mechanical creaking of the elderly drifted unnoticed past his conscience. "_hhssslck_." But if Shindou Hikaru didn't stop with that incessant, hissing slurp, Touya _was_ going to kill him – unfinished Ooteai game notwithstanding. "_hhssslck_."

He meant to confront him at lunch break, but Shindou seemed to have disappeared. It was another hour of playing and listening to the maddening sound of Shindou slurping before at last he crushed his terrified opponent and was able to leave the room. The sensible part of his mind suggested that he should go home now and not have to listen to even one more iteration of that god-awful noise. The rest of him, however, wanted the satisfaction of pounding Shindou's jaw into a shape that could never make the sound again, so he waited another half an hour.

When at last his rival emerged from the playing room, and began to don his shoes, Touya was waiting. He watched while Hikaru sat on the step - "_hhssslck_" - and pulled on his sneakers - "_hhssslck_" - and tied the left and then the right - "_hhsss_"

"Close your mouth and SWALLOW!" Enough was enough, really. Touya wanted to yell more thoroughly at his rival, but this was not the place. Ignoring Shindou's confused look, he grabbed the man by his elbow and all but dragged him into the elevator. The moment the door closed, he let him have it. "Just what the HELL do you THINK you're DOING? That noise is driving me CRAZY!"

Shindou winced at the outburst and closed his mouth for the first time all afternoon. But he didn't shout anything back. Brought up short by this lack of response, Touya peered more closely at his rival. Shindou glared, but remained silent. For two floors, neither made a sound. Then Touya brought his hand up to softly brush Shindou's cheek, and the blond man yelled and pulled his face away.

"Dammit, Shindou, go to the dentist if you have a toothache!" His cheek had been unnaturally warm, and although it wasn't immediately obvious, there was some swelling. The elevator door opened depositing the two in the lobby. Shindou made his way to the lobby vending machines and bought a cold can of peach tea. Rather than drink it, he held it ever so carefully against his jaw.

"I can'." The can muffled the words somewhat, but not enough to make them unintelligible. "A' si'ce whe' d'you swear so much? _hhssslck_."

Touya ignored the bait. "Give me one good reason why you haven't already arranged an appointment." It was not open to debate.

"No hea'th i'sura'ce." They had reached the front door and Hikaru's reply was quiet enough that his friend wondered if the sound of the hinges might have obscured some portion that might make sense.

"WHAT!" Hikaru tried to turn to head for the train station, but Akira stopped him with an unyielding hand on his arm. "How can you not have health insurance? Your daughter alone is a walking disaster-"

"We, _hhssslck_, always used Aka'i's policy, but the' we were se'arated so 'ong..." Even through the slurping, the man's voice took it's familiar dip towards the maudlin at the mention of Akari. Akira sighed, but was not about to be swayed by the latest – and by far dumbest – evidence of his friend's sentimentality.

"Fine. Then you'll just have to pay out of your pocket." He took his friend's hand and started heading toward his car, while with his other hand, he punched up Ishikawa's number on the cell phone. The go salon attendant had supplied him with his dentist's number before they reached the car and he began dialing.

"Bu' I don' have a den'is'," Hikaru objected.

"I'm calling mine."

"Bu' I don' have a' appoin'men'!"

"I'm sure he'll squeeze you in." It had already rung twice.

"I's no' even tha' serious – _hhssslck_-"

"Will you just shut up and get in the car!" For a moment, it looked as though he might have some further objection, but his tooth must have twinged, because the man winced, adjusted the can against his cheek, and then opened the car door to climb in. Akira opened his door as well, but remained standing outside the car as the cheerful receptionist picked up. He explained the situation to her, then waited while she consulted with the dentist and the schedule. There was a cancellation, and they could see Hikaru in twenty minutes, if he could make it in that soon. Akira agreed (he'd make it if he had to speed through every last red light), and put his phone away, dropping into the driver's seat with a feeling somewhere between irrational irritation and protectiveness. He decided not to think too carefully about the latter.

Eighteen minutes later, Akira presented his rival to the receptionist at the office of the dentist his family had been using for fifteen years. His manner was that of a customer returning faulty merchandise to the manufacturer for repair. Hikaru didn't _comment_ on it, but then, his wide eyes and failure to say anything beyond the simplest answer to the usual health questions spoke volumes regarding his fear of dentists. The hygienist arrived to usher him back to the exam room, and Akira handed his card to the receptionist.

"Please call me when he's finished," he requested. He had a feeling that tooth was going to have to come out and didn't want to think about Hikaru trying to find his way home while dosed with sedatives. The idiot would probably fall asleep on the subway and ride around for days... He shoved his anger aside and made his way across the street to a small cafe. Finding a place to sit with a steaming cup and the latest draft of his book of tsumego, he settled in to wait.

One hour later, his cell phone rang. By then he had established that Akari was not home and Kinume, out of the country again. It made a strange sort of sense that the girl's father fell apart every time she went to Russia, but his rival wished he would get over it. After all, _he_ lived alone and had never had any difficulty managing his daily life.

Then again, he hadn't had anyone else to help him with it since he'd left home at eighteen. He paid his bill, replaced his papers in his brief-case and made his way to the dentist's office building. Hikaru was sitting in the lobby looking slightly drunk, but otherwise well. Seeing Akira, he smiled with an utter happiness that was almost as heartwarming as it was disturbing.

"I think I need a ride home," he said, as though needing a ride were the most fantastic thing a person could experience. Whatever drugs the staff had administered, they were clearly a long way from wearing off. Hikaru's smile remained, and Akira decided that really the disturbing aspect was simply that half of his rival's mouth was too numb to participate.

"Well, at least we agree on that," the un-drugged rival commented, and helped his friend out to the car. Once he had him safely ensconced in the passenger seat, the patient fell asleep almost immediately. Akira decided he was less irritating that way, despite the drool, and let him doze all the way back to his apartment. Arriving there, he realized that he didn't have an access card for the building's garage, and instead had to make due with the nearest public one. It was still relatively close, but the soft snores coming from the left side of the car suggested that transferring his friend from the car to his home would take some doing.

"Shindou, wake up; we're here." Dark eyelashes stayed firmly affixed to their owner's cheeks, beneath a sheaf of blond bangs. Touya sighed, finished parking, and reached over to give his rival a shove. "Wake UP!" But rather than wake up or even open an eye, his rival merely fell slowly sideways, until his head rested against the window. "Fine," announced the expedient Samaritan. "But you'd better wake up when I open that door, because I am not searching your pockets for the keys. And don't think I wouldn't leave you passed out in the hallway." He continued to grumble as he unbuckled his rival's seatbelt, left the car and made his way to the opposite side.

Touya had managed to convince himself that Shindou was the most inconsiderate, unintelligent, and generally trying individual he had ever met by the time he reached the passenger door. He yanked it open with unnecessary vehemence, and found himself suddenly burdened with the dead weight of his friend's torso. Leaping back in instinctive surprise, he failed to catch the other man's head as it fell limply to the ground. Guilt, embarrassment and fear that he'd now have to somehow carry an unconscious and concussed idiot all the way across the street and up to his third-floor apartment swirled in Touya's mind, and he bent to push the man back upright in the seat.

"Shindou! Are you okay? What the hell did they give you anyway?" He brushed the bangs from his friend's eyes, then shook his face slightly. "Hikaru?" He leaned in just a little closer – suddenly wondering ridiculously if the man might somehow be dead – only to be startled a second time as green eyes opened dazedly.

"Touya?" Hikaru was marvelously calm for one waking up to the angrily concerned face of his rival – less than an inch from his nose. He even smiled. Touya jerked away.

"Good. Now that you're awake, you can walk yourself back to your apartment." He stood, and offered a hand to help his idiot rival from the car.

"Okay." The smile was too sweet to be anything but drug induced, but he managed to make it to his feet. Touya scrutinized his stance on the pavement warily before letting go. "Seriouthly: I'm fine." Touya doubted that, but did not comment, instead choosing to escort his rival the rest of the way to his front door. Reaching it, Shindou seemed to have some difficulty identifying his keys. Touya yanked them from his hand and made use of the correct one. He then gave Shindou what he thought was a reasonably gentle push across the threshold, and watched in horrified satisfaction as the man landed on the ground for the second time that afternoon.

The smile remained, even staring up from it's resting place four inches above the carpet. Akira tried to glare at him, but in the end simply sighed. He closed the door, then sat beside his rival on the floor. Shindou turned, resting his head against his friend's hip, and once again closed his eyes.

"You always take such good care o' me, 'Kari..."

Touya stared at him, but didn't bother moving or protesting. As like as not, Shindou wouldn't even remember this tomorrow. He let his fingers brush once through the silken drift of his rival's hair, and told himself that really, he'd just been getting rid of that disgusting noise. He'd accomplished his goal, and any sentiments Shindou Hikaru might attach to it were simply

"_hhssslck...zzz_"

* * *

OMAKE! (because you've earned it for sitting through that)

**Typos**

"Shindou! It's been almost a year since you told me that you'd explain about Sai. Today I'm going to – wait a minute." Akira Touya pauses at the threshold of his rival's apartment. Not three feet away, Shindou is standing nervously, his face an odd combination of embarrassment and shellshock, with brightly painted daisies. "What the hell are you wearing?"

Not that he can't see for himself. His rival's long bangs have been pulled into a pair of baby-doll ponytails, while shimmering pink lip gloss adorns his baffled lips. The black-and-white striped halter top clings bizarrely to the sixteen-year-old boy's torso. Touya nearly chokes as he realizes that his friend's hips are encased in a white leather micro-mini skirt, but none of that can compare to the oddity of the knee high, six-inch platform boots in gleaming white vinyl. "She's GOT to start proof-reading," Touya gasped.

His rival gave a rueful smile and the tiniest of shrugs. "Hikaru no GoGo at your service."


	19. Vital Statistics

a/n: Rhoda informed me about a rather odd industry in Japan – externally imposed courtship (note that the nametags are filled out by the parents, not the victims - er - children). So I'll continue to play with the cliché I've been skirting for several chapters. Incidentally, my deepest appreciation to the folks who've actually kept track of the outright errors in this story. I'd never realized that about insurance in Japan, I realized only after the fact that Touya and Shindou cannot play to a tie (they use komi after all), and I screw up the go terminology all the time – but the fact that you folks care enough to tell me about it is oddly gratifying. So thanks again, and I hope I'll continue to amuse you. :)

**Part 19. Vital Statistics  
**

_Touya Akira. Age: 36. Profession: Go professional and small business owner. Annual Income: _¥_6.7mil. No children or pets. Health Status: no current illnesses or disabilities..._

Touya had forgotten about the name tag. In the surrealistic nightmare of the rest of the evening it had paled to insignificance. He still remembered meeting his mother and aunt at the hotel, ostensibly for dinner. He remembered the first slight sideways glance from his mother that tipped him that all was not as it appeared. He would never forget his aunt's speech regarding familial duty and the tragedy of an unmarried thirty-six-year-old, and the subsequent horrific four hours of conversing with similarly shanghaied singles in one of the hotel's ballrooms while his aunt dragged his apologetic mother off to explore Tokyo.

Of course, he'd known that his mother was somewhat disappointed with his continued single status. The problem had intensified somewhat when his cousins (the daughter and son of his mother's sister) began providing _their_ mother with grandchildren. Even so, he had never imagined she would go so far as to almost forcibly enroll him in a matchmaking program - certainly not one quite as... emphatic as this. The slightly bewildered group of thirtysomethings had not been allowed to leave the room until they could each provide the officiant with proof of two scheduled dates with other participants. It was nothing short of the ultimate expression of the maternal guilt trip and Touya had been decidedly unhappy with the whole affair.

Which was not to say that the assembled victims had been unattractive (well, some were) or uninteresting (although he hadn't met a single go player in the group). He simply had no interest in dating. Thoughts of his legacy had never occurred to him, and the idea of courting, marrying and raising children with some woman alternately terrified and annoyed him. Consequently dating had never really been a priority. He had been popular with the girls in high school, true enough. He had invited one or two along for various dinners, dances and other functions where female accompaniment was expected. There were even a few women among his students and colleagues whom he would go so far as to consider good company, but that was all.

Such had been the nature of his thoughts in the car on the way home, and they continued right into the garage, up the sidewalk and through the front door – until he discovered one of the only women he could honestly call a friend sitting in all her youthful splendor on a stool in his kitchen.

"How did you get in?"

"What are you wearing?" The questions flowed over each other to bounce harmlessly off their intended recipients. Then Kinume was reaching for his lapel and pulling the adhesive-backed tag from the summer-weight wool, and Touya was noticing the keychain on his impromptu guest's purse.

"What is this? Do you really make that much? Wouldn't you consider my father a child?What kind of idiot walks around with all this info for all the world to see?" She was clearly fascinated. Touya resisted the urge to rip the tag out of her hands and burn it. Kinume would probably know where to find his one lighter before he could anyway.

"What are you doing here?" He asked rather abruptly. It was almost ten o'clock and he had had quite enough of people for one evening. Kinume clearly heard all of that, but rather than assuming a properly demure air, grinned broadly.

"You said if I came by at eight, we could trade games, remember?" She smiled. He stared blankly at the girl, trying to remember if he'd really meant tonight. It was no use. He had.

"You waited for two hours?" As far as he could tell, Kinume never slept anymore, but he could still hope she might be cajoled into realizing the late hour. When she simply nodded, he decided that women were far too devious for him ever to hope to win against them. First his aunt and his mother, now this diminutive specimen all played him like a game of shidougo. He sighed. "Did you set up the board?" She nodded again and leapt from the stool with an unholy amount of energy. He wondered how many cans of juice she'd imbibed from his refrigerator. He hoped she never took up tea or anything caffeinated.

"I even boiled some water so I can make you tea if you want it," she offered, in an eerie display of mind-reading. It was clearly a concession to the exhaustion she was stolidly refusing to notice. Touya registered an idle hope that the two women he'd agreed to meet for dates, per the rules of this evening's gathering, would be slightly less adept at this game. Watching Kinume pour steaming water over leaves into the small, iron pot, he realized there was small chance of that. Someone clearly taught them these things from birth.

Of course, it was a little strange that the younger Shindou was so excited about what she called trading games. One of her biggest disadvantages when compared to her father was her inability to memorize games. While Hikaru could remember the exact moves of more than half of his matches, Kinume was hard pressed to remember more than "the gist" of any of hers. Akira had begun the challenge of trading games with her as a way to improve her memory. She would memorize a game and show it to him, and if she remembered it correctly, he would show her a match he'd found interesting in exchange. Ordinarily, she was quite bad at it, and consequently rather reluctant, but tonight she seemed positively eager.

"So I take it you found an interesting match to memorize this time?" Touya draped his suit jacket over the back of the nearest kitchen stool before settling himself comfortably in his usual place in front of the goban. Kinume appeared a moment later with his least favourite tea mug. She had long ago decided never to touch any of his more valuable china for fear of her own clumsiness, and eleven tea mugs stood shattered witness to the wisdom of this decision.

"Yep. It's a really good one," her eyes sparkled as though enjoying some grand joke. He gestured to the board, and she sat, appropriating the two coffers of stones. She opened them and picked up a black stone, hesitating slightly over the board. "Wait until I'm done, though, if you don't recognize it, okay?" He nodded and watched as she began laying out the pieces.

The young woman had grown more relaxed and elegant in her motions around the board. If her hands had none of the flamboyance they exhibited on the checkered battlefields of her true genius, they retained a certain grace. There was a confidence and comfort there so completely different from the edgy uncertainty of the women with whom he'd spent the evening. If only one of them could have exuded this calm happiness or the odd delight that this girl expressed for such tiny things as ducks and vending machines and the sound of stones on wood.

Touya found his mind idly attempting to construct the ideal spouse, as his eyes continued to stare at the board and his student's hands. She would be joyful and energetic and fearless like Kinume – perhaps a bit loud, but never falsely shy. Someone smart enough to understand him, with similar interests, would be nice. The idealspouse would be independent enough not to mind his absences, but would still genuinely need him – for what he couldn't imagine, but something beyond just children. For a moment, he was jolted from his reverie – he really didn't want children running around his home, breaking his artwork, eating his go stones. So perhaps, his dream wife would be barren, but they could adopt some teenager to carry on the family name.

Kinume paused to sweep her hair back over the opposite shoulder and off the board. Despite still dying the knee-length curtain dark purple, she was really a rather lovely girl, at least when she wasn't running around like a kite in a typhoon. She was of an age where quite a few people were beginning to consider her attractive (to her father's considerable unease), but thinking about it, Touya decided that his own idealspouse would be a little taller, perhaps a little less curvaceous, with hands like his student's only just a little larger, and eyes that could flash with that same competitive spirit... An entirely inappropriate image insinuated itself into his cogitations and abruptly, he returned his full concentration to the board. Only to choke on the sip of tea he'd been about to take.

"Touya-san? Did I get one wrong?" Her hand hesitated over the last stone she'd placed. It was black, a shinte, the stone that had ignited his attention and changed his life more than two decades ago.

"Where did you learn this game?" He tried to keep his voice calm, but his eyes gave him away and she became instantly defensive.

"You promised to wait until I was done," she protested, but there was a hint of uncertainty in her voice.

"Did your father show this to you?" he demanded. He'd only ever shown this game to a handful of people, and he and Shindou almost never spoke of it. It was a game interesting only in context, and he had to know if she knew it.

"Well it _is_ one of his games." She deftly avoided the question. "Anyway, do you want me to finish it? I know the whole thing." Her pride and confidence reasserted themselves with a force that all but convinced him she was being deceptive - perhaps not lying, but definitely hiding something. She took his lack of answer for agreement, and proceeded to lay out the last of the stones. They were all correct. "There, now you show me one," she smiled.

"Do you know what is important about the game you just laid out?" The games in most instruction manuals were chosen to illustrate specific points. This game's point had nothing to do with the hands played.

"It was his first game against you," she murmured, her eyes gone distant, and her face curiously wistful. She shook herself and smiled. "It's the game that made you rivals, so that one day you could be friends," the smile became an overblown grin, "so you could be my sensei and I could play go again." With that, she grabbed his nearly empty tea mug and headed back to the kitchen to refill it. He heard her puttering around for several moments, and then, "But you know, Touya-san, you really need to work on your people skills."

"Oh?" he replied, but all the while, he was staring at the old game.

"Yeah, your eyes get really scary when you're thinking about go, you know? So when you go on your dates you'd better think about something happier, okay?" He turned toward the kitchen to see her holding the name tag (with its matchmaking company's corporate logo) and her pocket computer. It was amazing how quickly young people could find things on the internet these days. She grinned in mischievous glee. "And blue goes better with your eyes than pink." He stood, stalking toward her, quite certain his eyes were too scary for Kinume's idea of proper interactions with ladies. She ran for the entryway. "Anyway, you look tired, so I probably better go home. Tou-san will be worried. I have an earlymatchtomorrow," she slid into her shoes even as he rounded the kitchen counter towards the entry hall, "butdon'tworryI'llsendTou-santogiveyousomepointers,'kay?" She flung the door open, hurled herself out into the warm night air and bowed, "thanksforhavingmeoverg'night!" And laughing, she ran off down the street. Touya rolled his eyes, felt a moment's righteous indignation, then permitted himself a small smile. He closed the door.

The fresh mug of tea was still steaming on the kitchen ledge. He took a relaxing sip, then picked up his telephone.

"Shindou," a pause as the voice on the end of the line confirmed it, "Your daughter is on her way home – it's your weekend, right?" A touch of parental concern. "No, she's fine, just please ignore anything she might tell you..." he looked in the refrigerator as his rival bombarded him with questions. Finally, he finished counting and answered. "Five cans of peach juice, Shindou." This was met with some shouting. "I know, I'm sorry. She drank them before I got here." A puzzled question about what had made him late was ignored. "The sooner you put her to bed, the better off you'll both be." There was a long pause as the voice on the other end softened slightly, then the cadence of an oft repeated apology-by-proxy. "I don't mind, she's far less hassle than most women." The voice on the other end clearly disagreed, but let it go with a snort of disbelief. "I'll tell you about it tomorrow." The standard "see you later" crossed from receiver to air to ear. The tiniest of pauses touched the line, then Akira said goodnight and hung up.

_Prior Relationships: uncertain..._


	20. Perchance to Dream

a/n: A lot of stories seem to have Shindou and Touya sleeping together... So I guess it's a cliche.

**Part 20. Perchance to Dream**

"No." Shindou's tone was so commanding that Touya actually hesitated in releasing the stone he'd been about to place. Then he realized his rival was in fact directing the order over his shoulder.

"But Ka-san said I could" Kinume's voice was pleading, but her father overrode her.

"She didn't see you wearing _that_. Go change, before I change my mind about letting you go at all." Curious, Touya turned to see just what it was the younger Shindou was wearing, and was surprised to discover a short black dress with spaghetti straps. It was perhaps a little more revealing than her usual uniform of chess-themed t-shirts and jeans, but it was tasteful and attractive.

"But I want to look nice tonight. Tonight is really important." She was still in pleading mode, but if Touya was any judge of Shindou psychology, the yelling would probably start soon. She noticed him watching and dragged him in. "You think I look nice, don't you Touya-san?" She smiled demurely and essayed a little turn, even as her eyes betrayed her full knowledge of his reluctance to get involved.

"Your father is undoubtedly a better judge of female fashions," he evaded. Parenting, he thought, was more of a two player game.

"And your father says to change, before he goes back and picks something _for_ you." The elder Shindou had clearly settled on being unreasonable. Touya sighed. This was going to end badly. He decided not to finish placing the stones of this game until after the verbal sparring had finished.

"I'm not a CHILD!" That was certainly part of the problem.

"You are still my daughter." Shindou stood and began to stalk toward her.

"If we were living in the Edo period, I'd be an adult already!" Touya reflected that the quarter acre lot upon which Akari's home stood was probably just enough to keep the neighbors from complaining.

"And I'd have married you off to someone of my choosing and you'd be doing laundry and serving tea and not disrespecting your FATHER!" If Kinume had been taller, they'd have been nose to nose. As it was, she had to look up to harden her eyes and reply.

"Then maybe I should just get married and save you the trouble," she hissed. The moment the sentence hit the air, all three of them knew she'd gone too far. Hikaru took a breath for some reply he would undoubtedly regret, but Touya beat him to it with a word:

"Shindou." Only Touya Akira could manage to fit that amount of warning, disapproval, and genteel disappointment into a single name, and both father and daughter felt the rebuke. Kinume turned and stormed back to her room. Hikaru stared in her direction for one more minute before returning to the goban on the dining room table. He sat with a huff, which Touya ignored, and watched as his rival continued laying out the interesting game he'd witnessed in Korea. "I think you'll agree this is worthy of noting in the book," Touya commented, pointing to an unusual shape in the lower center. "It's certainly the turning point of this game, despite being a very awkward location for such a pitched battle. I had thought to include it in the chapter on exceptions, unless you think it would be more applicable in the one on" he noticed his long time opponent's face was still glaring at the hallway leading back to the bedrooms, "tea ceremonies."

"Yeah, that would work," replied the elder Shindou, completely missing the deliberate incongruity. Touya considered being exasperated with the man, but realized he should have expected this. Shindou was not the most literarily inclined of people to begin with – extensive knowledge of the subject notwithstanding – and with Kinume about to leave for a formal event at the Russian embassy, with only her rival to keep an eye on her, Hikaru's attention could not have been any further removed.

"If you're that worried about her going to this, you shouldn't have given her permission in the first place." Touya began clearing the stones from the board, and the sound dragged his rival's attention back to him.

"Hey, I'm not done looking at that!" Shindou tried to sound annoyed, but at Touya's raised eyebrow, he abandoned the pretense and leaned back in his chair. "Akari said she could, so there wasn't much I could do. Anyway, they're just going to play an exhibition match and a few multi-player games, so I guess it should be okay..." He didn't really sound convinced.

Touya set a pair of black stones on the grid in silent offer of the only sort of stress relief he knew how to give. Shindou accepted, leaning across to grab a handful from the white go ke at Touya's elbow. Stones were counted, then exchanged and they began a round of speed go. The rapid click of forays and responses had its usual effect. Shindou clearly stopped listening for sounds of his daughter getting ready, and both players began to fall into the excitement of the game. Then the doorbell chimed.

Shindou didn't seem to hear it, but when Touya witheld his next move, he looked up. At Touya's nod to the entryway, Shindou paused. The doorbell chimed again, a muffled "Will somebody get that!" sounded from the younger Shindou's room, and her father stood with renewed tension, walking to the foyer like a Christian to the tigers of Rome.

His guest did not appear to be in any better shape. The young man's tuxedo hung elegantly on his rather thin frame. His black hair was neatly combed and the point of handkerchief in his breast pocket was straight, but his hands fisted nervously at his sides.

"Marko-san, Touya Akira-san," Shindou introduced him, apparently unaware of the number of times they had already met. "Touya, Piotr Markovich, K-chan's rival." The foreigner offered a hand in the custom of Europeans, only to reconsider and begin to withdraw it. Touya took pity on him and shook the hand, surprising his rival, before gesturing to another seat at the table.

"It's a pleasure to see you again, Mr. Markovich." He commented as they sat, noting that his easy politeness seemed to irritate Shindou. There was something satisfying in that. He ignored the goban in front of him, and continued studying the young man whose very existence had led Kinume to postpone taking the pro exams for two years running. "Kinume-san has been telling me of tonight's match for the past month." At this, the young man shot a pointedly curious look toward the hallway.

"She's not ready yet," her father answered. The foreigner nodded, then returned his attention to Touya.

"Shindou-san refused to play me at all for the past month. Apparently she thinks anticipation might add interest to this evening's event." A tiny smile threatened the young man's lips, only to be carefully hidden at the first sign of Shindou's frown. "I am afraid none of tonight's other guests will provide much of a," he paused, searching for the word, "thrill for her." Touya nodded and silence descended. The three men stared at the only distraction in the room, and Touya wondered whether resuming the game would be rude or a mercy.

"Do you play go, Marko-san?" Only his closest friends would have recognized the slight hope in Touya's question. Shindou gave him an odd look before turning to listen to the young man's answer.

"Ah, Shindou-san has attempted to teach me, but I am very poor at it." Silence threatened to reappear, but Shindou finally decided to be civil.

"She tells me you'll be competing in the final of the national championships next month. Congratulations." His tone wasn't as openly friendly as it could have been, but his guest didn't seem to notice. Shindou caught Touya's attention and glanced at the board. Touya obliged with a move and they continued the game as they waited.

"It's a pity your daughter is not Russian. I will miss her games in that tournament," Piotr smiled and glanced at the hallway as he said it, and Touya was suddenly glad that his own rival lived within a short train ride. "But I have been informed that I will be duly murdered tonight, so it may never come to that." His smile was wider and his eyes shone with it. Beside him, the elder Shindou had gone unspeakably pale. Touya turned just as Kinume spoke up.

"Your king is mine, Piotr. Your queen won't even come out tonight." Her smile was wickedly radiant, in an odd contrast to the formal gown she was wearing. The dark rose silk was of an almost parochial cut – long sleeved, and reaching the floor. Her throat was bare, but a white gossamer shawl covered her shoulders, and her long hair framed her face. "Well, Tou-san, is this better? I realize it's Ka-san's but I didn't have any other formals, so it will have to do." There was challenge in her eyes, but no real anger. Shindou didn't answer, choosing instead to stare. Piotr stood, in western fashion, and walked over to take her hand. He said something in Russian and Kinume blushed. Shindou found his voice.

"You look very nice," he conceded, interrupting the rivals' tete-a-tete. "Remember to leave your cell phone on, and call me if you need anything." He stood to walk the pair to the door, and Touya heard him issuing further instructions ("behave," "no drinking," and "you will be home by midnight,") then there was a faint squeak of hinges, a click of the latch, and the youngsters were gone.

Shindou returned by way of the kitchen, bringing a fresh bottle of juice for himself and tea for his rival. Sitting back in front of the goban, he stared for several moments before playing. They finished the game quickly, neither one speaking, then Shindou leaned back in his chair.

"You wanna go over the next chapter in the living room?" he asked, pointing to the stack of papers beside the board.

"Certainly," his rival agreed, and they took their drinks and papers and pens out to the living room where the two took up spaces at either end of the sofa and resumed the process of going over the go problems and examples that Touya had selected for his instruction manual.

At first, Shindou could not seem to concentrate. After the fourth time Touya caught him glancing at the door, he sighed in exasperation.

"Chess or go, Shindou?" The aspiring author engaged his friend in a game-quality glare. Caught off guard, Shindou grimaced somewhat sheepishly and ran a hand through his bangs.

"Go, of course." He grabbed a sheaf of manuscript. "As long as _they_ concentrate on chess..." he muttered. Touya shook his head, and Shindou finally managed a faint smile at his own paternal paranoia. They settled in to work.

An hour passed, then two. The goban was dragged to a spot in front of the sofa, the better to discuss ideas and errors in the text diagrams. Red ink stained countless pages as Shindou moaned about the "boring-ness" of some passages and Touya discovered grammatical errors in need of correction. Small arguments broke out, escalated, and enforced breaks. Touya wondered whether the spirit of such discussions would interest or merely distract future students. In the end, he did copy down some of Shindou's better points to add to the text. The likelihood of Shindou himself ever writing a book was decidedly slim, but his rival had long since acknowledged the truth: his go could not exist without Hikaru's.

By eleven o'clock, they were both very tired of looking at printed pages and diagrams. Hikaru had slid down to sit beside the goban with his back resting against the foot of the sofa while Akira had reclined on the cushions. His head rested on a throw pillow just behind Hikaru's left shoulder, and he watched his friend clear away the most recent problem.

"It's late. I should go," he murmured, wondering wryly when he'd gotten too old to stay awake all night. Hikaru cringed slightly at the ticklish feeling of the words so close to his ear.

"You could at least stay until they get back," he argued. "Somebody should be here to protect that damn rival of hers if he's so much as one minute late." He laughed slightly as he said it, but Akira suspected the implied threat was not entirely idle. "We could play a game."

Akira glanced down at the board, following Hikaru's gesture. He yawned. "I'm too tired. I doubt I could stay upright."

"Then stay there, and I'll place your moves for you," the oddly mysterious man chuckled at some internal amusement. "Unless you're afraid of losing, just 'cause you're half asleep..." That was a glove to the face, and they both knew it. Akira admitted defeat and grunted his acceptance as his friend smiled and did a quick nigiri for them both. A glance at the board confirmed the younger man was black, and he yawned.

"Four, six," he began, wondering at his rival's odd look of contentment.

It was Touya who heard the soft click of the door almost three hours later. Kinume froze at the sight of him, but he gestured to her father's softly snoring head where it rested on the sofa cushion just right of his chin, and shook his head ever so slightly. She smiled.

"Did you have a good night?" She whispered softly, her sharp eyes taking a quick evaluation of the half-finished game on the living room floor, and the stacks of edited paper. Touya nodded carefully, so as not to disturb his sleeping friend and Kinume smirked silently. She walked gracefully down the hall toward her room, but returned a moment later bearing an armful of blankets.

One, she folded with tender care around her father. He murmured slightly, but did not wake, and she pressed a kiss to his forehead. Then she unfolded the second one.

"Would you mind staying?" she whispered, a gleam of amusement tempered with a distinctly Shindou sort of concern flickered in her eyes. "He'll be upset if he wakes up to a half-finished game and no opponent." For a long, strangely profound moment, they stared at one another, then Touya nodded one last time. Kinume smiled and draped his blanket carefully, avoiding her father's head. Touya noticed the little silver king on a chain around her neck, and the way her lipstick was smudged, but he decided he was too much asleep to remember such things in the morning.

"Good night, Touya-san." She bowed ever so slightly before turning out the lights and returning to her room.

_Good night, Shindou..._


	21. Playing Blind

a/n: Someone wanted to know how Touya's date went - personally I don't care about her, so instead I bring you the cliche of a certain pro's fashion sense (or lack thereof).

**Part 21. Playing Blind**

It wasn't until he heard the knock on the door that Touya realized he'd forgotten to call off that evening's practice with Shindou. In retrospect, he should not have overlooked the detail, but there was nothing to be done about it once the dull sound of knuckles hitting wood echoed. Touya sighed and dropped the ties he'd been considering on the back of the sofa. The knock sounded a second time before he reached the door, and the hand was poised for a third attempt as he opened it.

"What?" he asked, knowing it was rude, but too flustered to bother being polite with someone as lacking in manners as his rival.

"Ishikawa said you had a date tonight." The statement clearly had a period, but was just as clearly a summary of uncounted questions. Shindou was smiling. Touya frowned.

"And you felt the need to drive all the way out here to inform me that she told you?" He remained standing in the doorway as he said it. Shindou did not back down, however, so he returned to the ties on the sofa, tacitly inviting the blond man to enter and observe. There was something simultaneously amusing and insulting in the way Shindou's eyes widened at the sight of the flowers in their bucket in the entryway.

"Wow. You really _are_ going out. I mean, Kinume said..." He let the statement trail off, while Touya tried to suppress concern at the thought of what Kinume might have told her father. "I just can't imagine you dating." Shindou grinned and sat on the sofa to watch his rival choose a tie.

"Why not?" Was the blue too severe? Perhaps the plum colored one... His hands didn't seem coordinated enough all of a sudden.

"I dunno. Maybe because it's you." Shindou's confidence that that said it all was almost as annoying as the fact that Touya privately agreed with him. Even so, a good argument sounded far more attractive than continuing to worry over the evening's plans. Touya decided to accept the opening.

"And what exactly is that supposed to mean?" In his mind, a black stone touched a star point.

"Well..." White took a reluctant position on the opposite side of the board. Touya glared. Black to the lower right. "It's just... you never even dated in high school." White cautious but sound in the upper left.

"I _have_ dated before." His hands began knotting the plum tie while his mind challenged white's last position with a block.

"Escorting some woman your parents set you up with to some institute function doesn't count." A white stone reinforced its neighbor, acknowledging the fight. Touya felt vaguely hurt, and black mirrored white.

"There have been other instances." He couldn't recall any, but he was sure there must have been at least one.

"And you're still planning to wear _that_?" Hane. Already black's position was weak. "I mean, lilac?" Shindou stood and headed back to Touya's room, leaving his rival to contemplate his mental goban in confusion. He called from the bedroom. "Where's that charcoal suit you wore to the benefit game last week?" Was it possible to take two moves in a row in mental go? Touya hurried back to see just what his rival was doing and caught him going through his closet.

"It's at the cleaners – your daughter spilled peach juice on the jacket the last time she was here... what are you doing?" His lighter grey suit was tossed over the back of his armchair, along with a blue shirt and the other tie he'd been considering.

"Your call, but you'd look better in that." Shindou smirked. Touya stared – realized white had him beaten – and resigned. He began changing while his rival took a seat in the armchair and continued his questions. "So is she pretty?"

"I suppose." He hadn't really thought about it, but from what he could remember the woman wasn't _un_attractive.

"What's she do?" Shindou's persistence was making him feel far more stripped than the fact that he was half way through changing his trousers.

"I believe she is an accountant." The hem of his shirt would not stray straight and he turned to the mirror to re-do it.

"Does she play go?" The irrepressibly nosy intruder had picked up the well-worn copy of his father's book of tsumego from its resting place on the arm of the chair and was leafing through it.

"I don't believe so."

"So what are you going to talk about?" Oddly enough, the question was concerned rather than joking. Touya swallowed, his mouth suddenly dry at the worry that had been nagging him all afternoon.

"I have no idea."

The shirt finally lay correctly and he finished adjusting his trousers and belt. His rival watched silently from the chair while he looped the tie beneath the collar and began the careful sequence of knotting it. When he finished, Shindou handed him his jacket, and he put it on despite the fact that he'd have to take it off for the car ride. They both stared at his reflection in the mirror for a moment. Then his rival grinned.

"You clean up nice, Touya-sensei," he teased, then seemed to reconsider. "Of course, I've never _seen_ you dirty..." He stopped, noticing the oddly uncomfortable look on his friend's face. He misinterpreted it, predictably. "Ah, it's okay. She'll probably talk enough for both of you." Touya rolled his eyes at this, but felt a little better just the same. He composed his expression into what he felt was an appropriate scowl and glanced from Shindou to the door. The older man took the hint and preceded him back to the living room.

The clock on the wall read six-forty, twenty minutes before the arranged time. Touya's eyes wandered briefly to the closet where his father's goban resided, only to blink as he noticed his rival's doing the same. 

"We probably don't have time for another game, huh?" commented Shindou. He smiled.

"No. But perhaps tomorrow morning?" It would be Sunday, after all.

"Can't. I'm headed to Spain with K-chan. She's playing some grandmaster and I didn't want her going by herself..." There was a hint of wistfulness in his voice. "I'll be back in a week, but then you'll be in China, right?" Touya nodded. Shindou made his way to the entry and sat to tie his shoes. Touya slipped on his loafers, but the temptation to call off his evening and stay for one last game with his rival was nearly overpowering.

The shoelaces were tied, but their owner paused on the stair. "You know, K-chan said that her friends always take cell-phones when they go on blind dates. Then they call each other half an hour through the date so that the girl has an out if she wants to leave... Crazy kids, huh?" He stood and reached for the door, but Touya caught his eye. Picking up the flowers from their bucket, he retrieved his car keys and cell phone from their place on the floor beside it. The latter he slipped into his pocket with barely perceptible deliberation.

"Have a safe trip, Shindou. You know how to reach me if anything comes up." It wasn't really a plea, but both rivals had always been able to read deeply. A handful of white stones joined the single black one on a grid only the mind's eye could see.

"Sure thing. Have fun tonight." They passed through the door and made their way to separate vehicles. Touya heard the growling of a familiar engine and smiled.

_pa-chi, pa-chi_


	22. Omedetou

a/n: And now for something completely different, because Touya's relatives are scary. I don't think this qualifies as cliché, but I can't get it out of my brain.

**Part 22. Omedetou**

"_I hear you're getting married."_

_A hand hesitated, ever so slightly, before placing the stone._

"_You mean it's true?"_

"_Yes. But I hardly think--"_

"_You. Touya Akira. Married." _

"_Yes."_

_Inscrutable eyes met incredulous ones. Then they focused on the board between them. Hands passed in silence. They paused. The pause lengthened until finally:_

"_You're serious?" His voice was quiet, concerned, a hint of something darker in its depths. The fingertips refused to grasp the next stone._

"_It's your turn."_

"_You're getting married?"_

"_Are you going to play or not?"_

"_This isn't some weird publicity stunt for the Institute or your mother or something? You're really getting married?"_

"_Dammit Shindou, MOVE! ...or leave." There was something wrong with his voice, though. He could not keep it calm._

"_Is that all you care about? My next play?" Too steady. Too quiet. Almost understanding._

"_Yes." They watched each other. The air was full of mysteries and omissions. Truth fell to the gridded lines. The white stone took its place on the board, and the game moved on._

#-

The news was all over the Institute, of course. There had been speculation for years regarding just how long it would take Touya to find a wife, marry and settle into the proper, Japanese lifestyle of his traditional, Japanese dynasty. Rumor had it this was an arranged marriage, but that wasn't particularly unusual, even for someone of Touya's age. The woman, Sakamoto Haruki, was the daughter of a friend of his aunt. What _was_ slightly unusual was the speed at which the arrangement had apparently been made. Ogata 9-dan would not comment, but Ashiwara 8-dan had gossiped that the negotiations had taken less than a month and that further, Touya had met Sakamoto-san for the first time less than a week before agreeing to the arrangement.

Still, however it had happened, it was certainly official. Touya himself had confirmed his engagement in his latest interview with Yamano, and within a week, all of Japan's go elite were aware of it – with varying degrees of interest. Shindou Hikaru, however, was in Russia at the time, by way of two months spent in Spain, China, Korea and Taiwan. He and his daughter had been keeping each other company while exploring the world and attending various matches, and had been decidedly out of touch. He was effectively the last to know.

#-

"_So who is she?" pa-chi._

"_A friend of my Aunt." pa-chi._

"_From Osaka?" pa-chi._

"_Yes." pa-chi._

"_Do you love her?" pa-chi. The silence broke their cadence. Blond bangs framed serious eyes. "Do. You. Love. Her?"_

_pa-chi._

_pa-chi._

"_Love is irrelevant. You were in love and that did not make your marriage a good one." The searching gaze became opaque, while the defensive glare failed to notice._

"_Our marriage is complicated."_

"_It is nonexistent. Why you don't sign the papers and make the divorce official... It doesn't change the fact that love is not a prerequisite for an acceptable marriage." pa-chi, but the stone had enough force to leave yet another obvious mark in the battered goban._

_A pause, then another white stone. Black and white followed each other wordlessly until they could go no further._

"_I resign."_

"_Thank you for the game."_

"_Shindou..."_

"_I've got to go."_

#-_  
_

Of course, in go circles it was the anticipation of a Touya heir that had people excited. Touya Kouyo had been the most exceptional player of his generation, and Touya Akira had, in the eyes of many, eclipsed his father. As far as anyone knew, the younger Touya had no special student, no protegé. He taught many lessons, and participated in two study sessions, but there was no one whom the go community could look upon as his heir apparent. With the announcement of his engagement, it was assumed that perhaps he had been awaiting a child of his own to assume his legacy and the patiently traditional echelons of their ancient game were reassured that a successor would likely join their ranks in fifteen years or so.

"Shindou-sensei, do you think your rival's engagement has anything to do with wanting to ensure the Touya family's legacy of go?" Yamano held his notepad ready. "Do you think his successor might be as great a player as the man himself?"

"Touya's engaged! To something other than a goban?" was his rival's surprising reply.

#-

"_I will see you tomorrow?"_

"_Yeah – er... actually, no."_

"_You're teaching?"_

"_Something like that. I have some things to do." He paused, as though to add something, but only ran a hand through yellow bangs._

_The last of the black stones poured into their bowl. The rival departed, but turned._

"_Touya?"_

"_Yes?" Eyes met, carefully unreadable on both sides now._

"_Congratulations."_


	23. Before You Leap

a/n: 'kay, so... fandom cliche. Might bother some folks. If you're one of them, my apologies. Yes, I'm talking about Akira and Hikaru's relationship. Yes, it's still friendship. Yes, there's also more to it than that. No, still not "twu wuv".

**Part 23. Before You Leap  
**

They sat in the dining room, facing each other from opposite sides of the low table. Sakamoto-san was the picture of refined womanhood, in a pale green suit and tasteful pearl necklace. Her hands rested in her lap and her face wore a faint smile beneath demurely downcast eyes. Touya was likewise well dressed and carefully proper. He observed his fiancé in minute glances, while his attention remained ostensibly on his aunt, where she sat between them, chatting away.

Of course, it would have been horribly improper to have an unchaperoned date, at least if his relatives were to be believed. Even so, Touya could not help wondering if his fiancé would ever manage to tell him enough about herself before the wedding for him to at least succeed in presenting her with a wedding gift she might actually like. So far, about all he knew was her name, the fact that she was twenty-seven, that her father was a wealthy lawyer, and that Sakamoto-san herself worked in the secretarial division of the firm. Other details, such as what the woman did for fun or where she liked to eat had yet to arise, let alone what she might expect from her husband beyond the traditional stable home, strong sons and chance to serve his every need.

Aunt Midori was now rambling on about the lovely kimono she'd worn to her own wedding decades ago and how beautiful Sakamoto-san would look in such a garment. Touya tried not to sigh. He wondered if there were any tasteful way at all to extricate his fiancé or even himself from his aunt's presence for the rest of the afternoon. It did not seem likely. In his mind, Aunt Midori was a formidable arrangement of black pebbles so flawlessly defended as to be unconquerable. He found himself considering white moves anyway.

"TOUYA-SAN! You can't pretend you're not here if your door's unlocked, and I have a game you really have to—see." Chaos and the death of etiquette stood frozen in the doorway to the dining room, having noticed his guests. Kinume's baby-doll t-shirt and dangerously short skirt were almost violently at odds with the reserved gathering, and Touya noted the disappearance of his aunt's eyebrows with amusement as the matron took in these details. "Er... hi?" She smiled with the sudden uncertainty of a teenager who remembered this house was a touch more formal than either of her own.

"Shindou-san, allow me to introduce my Aunt, Sato Midori-san," Kinume bowed quickly and his aunt returned it with a nod, "and my fiancé, Sakamoto Haruki-san." At this, Kinume's eyes went wide and she stared at the woman with frank curiosity. Sakamoto-san, for her part, smiled politely at the girl, waiting.

"Holy Sh- I mean, um... Congratulations on your engagement, Sakamoto-san," Kinume managed before bowing.

"Thank you, Shindou-san," the woman replied in her soft voice, eyes faintly amused, and lips curved in a very correct smile.

"Um... you're welcome," the girl answered, her voice smoothing into a more ladylike tone and her posture straightening, even as her eyes took on the slight edge they acquired when she began a game.

"Kinume-san, was there something you needed?" Touya decided to intervene. Ladylike behavior from his student seldom boded well and he did not think it wise to let her spend too much time with his guests. The gaze she turned on him was all but begging for information, but she smiled casually.

"Well, we had a lesson this afternoon, if you remember." Her tone was just accusative enough that Touya suspected his message to her mother had never actually reached his pupil. "But I don't want to interrupt your date. I'll just grab some kifu and head home, if you want. We can reschedule for this weekend sometime?"

That seemed like the best course of action to Touya but before he could voice his agreement, his aunt was babbling excitedly.

"Ah, you are one of Touya's students? How wonderful! I had been telling Haruki-chan of her fiancé's love for go, but we have not yet managed to get him to play for her. It seems to me that watching a teaching game might be a lovely way to show her his skill. Please, Akira-chan, why don't you play your student for us?" She phrased this last request with matriarchal emphasis and Touya's chest twinged at the sudden sinking feeling. Kinume's eyes lit up.

"I'm not sure Sakamoto-san would find it at all interesting, and you did mention you had another acquaintance to visit this afternoon..." Touya knew from long experience that non-go players generally found the game about as interesting as chartered accountancy. He also knew Kinume was far too distracted by his fiancé to truly concentrate on a game.

"Oh, I think I can leave you three alone while I meet my friend. It won't take more than an hour or two, and I'll return to pick up Haruki-chan before it's dark," his aunt smiled. "Besides, you play Go, don't you Haruki-chan?"

"Ah, I have played it, yes. Although only for fun, and I'm afraid I am not terribly skilled." She was looking at the table again.

"Hey, that's okay. I only play for fun," commented his student with a sincerity that made Touya want to kill her, if only a little. Playing go and getting rid of his aunt all at once was almost enough of a reward to assuage the doubts in his mind. Including Kinume in the plan, however, could be like exchanging the frying pan for the fire.

"Ah. Well, I _would_ enjoy seeing Touya-san play, if he would not mind." Sakamoto-san sounded almost as sincere as Kinume, and Touya gave up.

"Very well." They all stood, and Touya lead the way into the living room. His aunt said her goodbyes with giggling confidence, while Kinume set up the goban. Then the three were alone.

Kinume looked at the engaged couple. "So, should I leave you two alone?" she asked, looking at Haruki. The woman hid her mouth with one gloved hand, but at least did not blush.

"Oh, no, whyever would you do that?" Her tone was a little too blatantly innocent, and Touya hoped Kinume would take the hint. She didn't.

"So you can chat or write poetry or make out on the couch? If it were me, I'd take every chance at alone time I could get. I mean, you _are_ planning to spend the rest of your lives together..."

"Kinume-san!" Touya had wanted to maintain his flawlessly calm and polite exterior in front of his guest, but somehow nothing short of blatant rudeness ever seemed to reach the Shindous. That time, she did get the message, and had the decency to look slightly apologetic.

"Sorry. I'm sorry if I offended you, Sakamoto-san."

"That's quite all right. I am not offended. Your offer is most generous, but I'm afraid it would simply be inappropriate to accept it right now." That said, she settled herself onto the cushion Kinume had set out for her. Touya took that as a sign and took his place at the board, followed by his student a moment later. They chose for color and began. Kinume was white.

"So, Sakamoto-san, have you been watching Touya's matches lately? I've been catching up on my Weekly Go for the past few days, but from the looks of it, he's had a couple really impressive games." She played as she spoke, and Touya wondered how poor a game this would be.

"Ah, I'm afraid I don't follow the game in its professional form." Haruki watched the stones intently but with no sign of truly understanding how the play was progressing. Kinume stared at her.

"But you really like Go, right? I mean, you really like playing it at least?"

"It is a very honorable game, but I find I usually prefer to play cards." Haruki smiled at no one in particular while Kinume arched a pointed eyebrow at Touya. He slapped a stone onto the kaio, forcing her attention back to the board. She smiled, and placed an immediate reply, brushing purple hair behind one ear. Then she looked back to the older woman.

"I know what you mean. I prefer chess, myself, but my father thinks I should play go. I'm sure Touya's told you all about him." The pro in question had in fact been concentrating on the board and missed the comment.

There was something troubling about that last hand. He strengthened his position in the upper right, and watched as Kinume continued to lay out a pattern that was at once strangely familiar and utterly incomprehensible. It wasn't bad, precisely, but rather it seemed unusually complex for her. Even so, the hidden barbs and elegant traps began to appear as they sped into the middle game. It was only after another ten or so hands that he realized he had been ignoring the conversation.

"--thought Touya was trying to corrupt his daughter, so of course, I wound up having to take a break from studying with him. But Tou-san's impulsive like that and the two of them worked it out eventually." Kinume was chatting along with even less regard for politeness than usual, and more frighteningly, his fiancé appeared to be listening intently to every word. "Of course, I guess it didn't help that I fell asleep in Touya's f--"

"Ah, I'm sorry, I seem to be neglecting you, Sakamoto-san." The very proper young woman looked up at him in surprise, a slight blush coloring her cheeks in the first show of genuine emotion he could remember seeing from her. Kinume grinned.

"Oh, not at all," Sakamoto-san reassured him, "I'm sure you're concentrating on ensuring that your student is learning correctly." But she sounded rather amused and curious.

"Kinume-san is quite advanced, although perhaps not as good as she believes herself to be. I find it a fun exercise to continue to challenge her." As if in reply to this, his student had the audacity to smirk as she placed her next move. It was brilliant, and for a moment, his attention wavered again, but he forced himself to listen to his fiancé.

"Ah yes. She was telling me that her father is also a go player, and that the two of them were recently in China for a match."

"The TSC Invitational, I believe. Shindou Hikaru is another highly skilled professional. If his daughter would follow his path a little more closely, I believe she might have a great future in the game." He tried to emphasize this point to his student, but she was playing again and pretended not to hear. It was another daunting move and he suddenly recognized an almost inescapable trap in her formations. The elegance of it stunned him.

"Ah, but I am sure his skill cannot match yours," Sakamoto-san was saying, with almost ritual politeness. Touya bit down his irritation at having to split his attention enough to demure from the praise as expected. His fiancé insisted, as per the dictates of polite conversation, and he marveled at how boring and dishonest the exchange was when compared to the sharper discourse on the grid in front of him. Kinume was about to massacre him in a way he had not experienced in years, and his oblivious guest would not stop talking.

Across from him, his student grinned, transforming her face into the image of her father's smugness and slammed a stone down. He could not help the excitement and appreciation that the move engendered, even as he wondered if there were any hope for him at all. There was certainly something of her father's reckless brilliance in the move, but still a certain elusive quality...

"--play three times a week, but they haven't lately. Tou-san still usually plays at least six hours a day. That's pretty normal for him. Then when he's not playing in matches or teaching, there are study sessions and practice and analyzing kifu and traveling. It's a pretty busy life."

"Ah, but I'm sure your mother is proud of him," Haruki commented. Her conversation with Kinume seemed undeterred by the girl's playing.

"Actually," Kinume considered for a moment, before cutting off her teacher's carefully considered advance with a clever hane, "it broke up their marriage. They've been separated for almost five years now. It was just too hard for her to always come second, but maybe you won't mind so much." The girl noticed how serious her tone had become and laughed lightly. "Of course, my parents are very good friends, these days, so I guess it worked out okay."

Haruki smiled in response, but her voice was a little less confident. "I am sure I will succeed in providing Touya-san with a household in which he will enjoy living."

"Oh, yeah. I'm sure you guys will be fine." Kinume's voice was too cheerful, but Sakamoto-san did not know her well enough to recognize the tone. As for the man who should have noticed, he was too involved in the life-or-death struggle on the goban. The multi-faceted battle went well beyond the simplicity of speed go or a teaching game, and his mind played out hundreds of possibilities in search of hope.

"Would you like some more tea? I think he's going to be a while on his next move, and I could use some peach juice." Kinume was stretching her legs out one at a time.

"Oh, I can get it, if Touya-san would tell me where. I don't wish to interrupt." Sakamoto-san looked to her fiancé, but his gaze was focused on the goban. His student smiled.

"Don't worry about it. I know where everything is. Back in a second." The girl stood in a cascade of purple hair and went to the kitchen. Behind her in the darkening living room, the betrothed pair sat alone together for the first time. Touya was vaguely aware of his fiancé and the way she was watching him, but the game controlled his attention. This was far beyond Kinume Shindou. The elegance and beauty of the shapes reminded him slightly of her father's games in May, when he'd been studying the old kifu and feeling nostalgic. Nostalgia... It hit him with a sudden, blinding force where he had seen this style before, and when he looked up, the eyes watching him as they approached, canned drinks in hand, were ancient and mischievous.

"I brought you one too, Touya-san," she said, handing him the can and breaking the silence all at once. "He doesn't like peach juice, but he always has some in the refrigerator for me."

"That's very thoughtful of him," Sakamoto-san was accepting a can of chilled oolong, the same as the one handed to Touya.

"Yep. He's always been nice to me. Well, when he's not tongue tied and gaping at the board like a pithed frog. Oi! Touya-san!" She was laughing a little, as though his distraction were not unusual. Sakamoto-san actually smiled at his consternation, but the beleaguered teacher failed to notice. He was too busy cataloging all the little clues he had somehow missed while playing. Kinume shrugged. "Anyway, you see what he's like. He and Tou-san are both like that. Whatever else is happening, go always seems to come first. Just something you might want to think about."

"Ah, thank you for your concern, Shindou-san, but I'm certain such details will be worked out in time." Sakamoto wore what could only be described as an indulgent smile for the younger girl. "A lady can always take her husband's mind off work." Kinume shook her head at the older woman's incomprehension.

"But it's not-"

"Kinume," Touya spoke up suddenly, "Did you play your father on your trip?" Both women looked at him in surprise, but he ignored it, attention riveted on the younger one. "Did he teach you anything?"

Sakamoto-san hid her dismay at their host's inattention well, but Kinume noticed. The eyes with which she met her teacher's gaze were sharp. "You know, I really should let you guys talk. My dad and I aren't nearly as important as your fiancé, and besides, you can see us any time, right?" She placed another stone. Touya ignored her words, instead concentrating on the game. The bleak outlook had not changed.

"Go is a rather intense game for professionals, isn't it?" Sakamoto-san commented quietly. Kinume nodded.

"You don't know the half of it." Her eyes remained on her teacher. He placed a stone, and she placed her reply, smiling a bit grimly. "It's what people like my father live for. Over the years he has spent more time with Touya-san pursuing the perfect game than he ever spent with my mother or I. He remembers the details of his life by the games he played at the time. All of his friends, all his good memories from middle school on, are somehow related to go... I think if you cut him, he'd bleed go stones." Kinume smiled with wistful amusement, and Sakamoto-san returned it, for all that her face had become even more thoughtful.

"Your father sounds like an interesting man."

"Yeah. I guess." She watched her teacher carefully place a cautious counter-move. "Almost as interesting as my teacher, eh?" The girl sighed and set a white stone on the board. Sakamoto-san stared at it, as though trying to understand, but it was clear that she could not read the other conversation that had been happening as they talked. "Anyway, it was very nice meeting you, Sakamoto-san." Kinume stood, stretching.

The movement brought Touya's attention back to the people in the room, and he looked at her.

"You're not staying to finish the game?" His tone spoke volumes regarding his disapproval.

"I already have." Her eyes met his, steadily, then glanced at the lower left corner of the goban. He followed her gaze, and understood, but when she then nodded to the woman sitting to the left of the board, he missed the connection. Kinume sighed again, before smiling with false brightness. "Anyway, I've got to get home to help Ka-san with dinner. Tou-san's coming tonight, so we're going all out." She spoke this last with a conspiratorial wink to Sakamoto-san. The older woman smiled in reply.

"It was a pleasure meeting you, Shindou-san. I hope your evening will be an enjoyable one." Sakamoto-san nodded to her, and the girl made her way to the entryway. Touya nodded slightly to his fiancé, then followed his student to the foyer, where she sat pulling on a pair of high-heeled boots.

"We need to discuss this game, Kinume-san. Your play was--"

"You need to discuss your future, Touya. With your fiancé." The girl's smile was gone, and suddenly Touya wondered just how much he had missed while playing her. Even so, whatever it was paled in comparison to the discovery he had made. Somehow, his rival's daughter had played like the ghost of Sai, and the secret--

"Oh, and Tou-san won't be meeting you at the salon for a while," she continued. "He told me to pass that on." Her face was hidden by the angle of her shoulder as she bent to zip up one boot, but her voice was strangely distant. When she looked up, her eyes were an odd mix of cold and concerned. "Your fiancé's a real lady, Touya-san. Don't screw up her life."

"I don't intend to. And in any case, my private affairs are no concern of yours." He hid behind formality, but realized it was a weak move. Kinume's eyes flared with the annoyance and disgust of a teenager discounted.

"Fine. I'm leaving. But just to phrase it so you'll understand: if your opening is really as weak as it looks, even a brilliant middle game won't save it, and yose will tear your heart out and feed it to you," she shook her head, standing and grabbing the door handle, more angry than he'd ever seen her. "Even _I_ know when it's better to resign." And with that, she left.

---

When Touya returned to the living room, it was getting dark. Sakamoto-san remained sitting patiently on her cushion, a polite smile on her lips as her eyes stared out into the distance.

"Shall I turn on a light?" he asked, feeling unsettled and irritated by his student and curious and frustrated by the game. Sakamoto-san turned to nod at him, and he flicked the switch, filling the room with the warm glow of a tasteful paper lamp.

"I hope my presence did not interfere with your game," she began, the soft sound of her voice oddly emphasized by the vacuum left in his student's wake.

"It didn't." He stared at the stones, replaying the hands in an attempt to pin down the pivot point, the moment at which his loss began.

"Ah." The stillness of the room grew faintly sad. Graceful, gloved hands resettled themselves on the smooth green fabric of her skirt. Across the board, he could not seem to find what he was looking for, and wondered why his mind continued to fail him. The woman beside him finally spoke again. "Thank you for showing me the game. Your student is a very interesting person, and the play was really quite exciting." Her voice was light like a flock of birds, and as inconsequential. They both felt it, but Touya grudgingly pulled away from his contemplation to answer her politely.

"Her manners are lacking and her go could use work, but I am glad her company did not disturb you." Somehow the expected dismissal of his student's talents rang more hollow than usual.

"Shindou-san was a wonderful addition to our afternoon," Sakamoto-san replied, completing the ritual of roundabout compliments almost inescapably. "But of course, I always enjoy your company."

"You honor me with your presence," Touya answered, feeling the walls of formal politeness once again surround them. The pattern of comment and response was as regimented as an opening game between professionals, and he remembered his student's words. "Sakamoto-san, would you care for a fresh cup of tea?" It was an uninspired move, and even he could see the weakness of the formations they were forming.

For a moment, the woman met his eyes searchingly. A terrifying minute stretched while he wondered if she would say something unexpected – somehow change the nature of their game into something more dangerous or interesting or fun. But then her eyes resumed their polite opacity, and her face smoothed into it's mask of perfect composure.

"Thank you, no."


	24. Shidougo

a/n: Old dogs can in fact learn new tricks. Of course, I've never thought thirty-seven was really all that old...

**Part 24. Shidougo**

There were at least a dozen other things he should be doing. Touya Akira sat at his usual goban in the corner of the salon, sipping tea and looking at the empty grid. He was scheduled to play in a demonstration match at Tokyo University the following morning, and had yet to even study his opponent's matches. There were half a dozen proposals, quotes and other documents regarding the salon remodel, which still required his review and approval. At home, a stack of messages from his mother and aunt required replies, not to mention the one letter from Sakamoto-san. He looked at the clock, and took another sip. This would make three weeks that Shindou had not come to the salon, but Touya decided to wait anyway.

A polite cough interrupted his contemplation.

"Please excuse me, Touya-sensei. I was wondering if you might grant me a teaching game." With her head bowed, the woman was unrecognizable and he wondered what could have motivated Ishikawa to let her bother him. Glancing at his clerk, he noted her imploring gesture and looked at his would-be student more closely. She was of average height, tastefully dressed in a dress shirt and tailored slacks, hair arranged stylishly around her face. Even so, it took a glimpse of her eyes to spark recognition – she'd changed so much since the separation - and when he realized who she was he almost considered saying no anyway.

"Shindou-san," he nodded to his rival's wife, then continued to stare.

"I'm afraid my husband is busy tonight. I thought that might leave you with some spare time." She smiled with the perfectly crafted charm of a highly trained executive assistant, but he sensed a surprising intensity beneath the polished manners. "May I sit?" The second request was just as light, but with an odd emphasis. Cautiously curious, he nodded.

"I'm not sure of your strength." He decided to keep things simple. "Place as many stones as you'd like."

"Hmm," she pretended to consider, smiling. "I believe I'll take seven, please excuse my inferiority." Something about that last comment felt barbed, but he merely handed her the black go ke, then watched as she placed her handicap. They exchanged ritual greetings and he began their play. The first several hands revealed considerable experience, if no real talent. She laughed softly behind her hand.

"You play differently than my husband, but I can still see hints of his style." This was true enough, but he was surprised she noticed.

"You're most perceptive, Shindou-san." He wondered whether Shindou might have sent her.

"Akari," she corrected, pausing to look at him. He found it interesting that she did not try to play and speak simultaneously. "Shindou-san is my husband, or sometimes my daughter. I'm afraid if you call me that, we'll both spend this game looking for them."

"Akari-san," he acknowledged, and she reconsidered the board before carefully placing her move. Then, because she had opened the topic for discussion, he allowed his curiosity a little freedom. "May I ask how your family is doing? I have not seen Shindou for some time, and Kinume-san has missed her last three lessons." He glanced down and placed his move, then looked back up for her reply.

"Well, Kinume has been having trouble with her chess game and with being a teenager," she paused to frown thoughtfully at the arrangements of stones, her face very like her daughter's. After several minutes, she found the solution he'd set up for her, and placed it. "I'll probably send her to Russia and let her rival straighten her out. That is, provided I can get her father to agree to it."

"He seldom trusts Marko-san's motives," murmured Touya, certain he knew how Shindou would react if Akari tried to send Kinume away. Akari glanced at him sharply.

"True. But he does trust me." She said it firmly, and he found himself wanting to argue just for the sake of arguing. "Besides, Piotr understands my daughter better than I do, much less Hikaru." The casual way she said his name bothered Touya. This was the same woman who had put his rival through domestic hell, and there she sat using the names and titles her marriage certificate allowed, all life evidence notwithstanding. "As for Hikaru," she accented the name with a tenderness that was both unexpected and irritating, "he's a little preoccupied at the moment."

"A family matter?" Touya placed his next stone to conceal the depth of his interest. Akari watched him, then looked at the stones.

"You might say that." The frown returned as she appeared to think about the game. "Someone he cares about is making confusing life choices, and it's upsetting him. He's always been very emotional, you know." There was no question in her tone as to whom she meant, but her choice of words both surprised and irritated her opponent. _To be so blunt..._

"Did he send you to discuss my marriage? Because it is hardly his concern. Or yours." His voice took on an edge, but he found himself holding back from the level of anger he might have thrown at his rival. Shindou Akari, after all, was barely an acquaintance, and names aside, not someone with whom he had earned the right to be honest.

For her part, she lingered over her choice of play – whether from deliberate social manipulation or necessary concentration, he couldn't decide. After a pause long enough to make a case for either, she finally moved, then looked up. He realized she had been taking the time to compose herself.

"When someone does something to upset my husband, it becomes my concern. Especially when that someone is you, Touya Akira-san."

"You still call him your husband, but you haven't lived with him, have not been his wife in any sense but the legal one in five years. You broke his heart, abandoned him, tried to take away his daughter and his love of the game all at once, and you still call him your husband and pretend to have any right to defend him?" He glared at her, and wondered whether crushing her on this goban would satisfy the anger she had suddenly awakened.

"If you don't understand why I did what I did, and why we live as we do, _you're_ the one who should think carefully about what it means to be married." Touya still had not played, but Akari clearly did not care about the game. That in itself was enough of a shock to make him consider her words. But not enough to agree with her.

"Why are you here?" He asked it calmly, hiding his anger as he would before a stranger. Akari did the same. Her face became a politely amused mask and she spoke quietly.

"Confronting the mistress has always been the right of a wife."

Touya blanched and stared at her, only the setting keeping him seated. He felt like ending the game immediately, devastatingly, but realized that to her it would hardly matter. Then it occurred to him that she most likely only meant go. After all, go was certainly Hikaru's mistress as no human ever could be, and his rival was the most obvious embodiment of the game. A natural target. Abruptly, she flushed and looked again at the board.

"I'm sorry. I didn't really mean that." She sighed and looked unhappy and the professional across the goban placed a stone to calm down. They both focused on the board for a while and three hands passed in silence.

Ishikawa brought a second cup and a fresh pot of tea, pouring for the owner's guest. Akari thanked her sincerely, and sipped delicately from the porcelain cup. The next move was confusing her, but the fact that she was concentrating on the game was a sort of concession in itself.

"If you'd like a hint..." he offered, mollified enough to be polite. But she demurred.

"No, thank you. If I can't figure it out on my own, what have I learned?" She smiled a little wistfully. "I'm really not here to try to advise you, Touya-sensei. And I don't care who you marry or why. It's just..." She took another sip from the cup. "Marriage is a lot of work – a lot of compromise and sacrifice and thinking about life in terms of another person. Love isn't enough to make it work, but the lack is enough to make it not worth the effort. Hikaru and I made a lot of mistakes in twelve years." Her gaze grew a little distant, remembering. "I hurt him. He hurt me. We both made life hell for our daughter." Her smile became rueful, not meeting his eyes. "Kinume hid in chess. Her father hid in go. We're all okay now, but for a while it was very hard." Akari returned her focus to the goban, covering her lapse with a little murmur of "Oh!" before she placed the proper play.

Touya didn't know what answer to give to her words, so he replied to her stone instead. It was not an answer she would understand the way her husband or daughter might have, but he tried to build a pattern she might win with due consideration - not an easy victory, but a chance. Akari found her next move quickly.

"I guess what it comes down to is that they care about you, and Hikaru especially doesn't want to see you get hurt. He doesn't understand what it is that's motivating you, and after what my daughter has told me, neither do I." She watched as he played, but waited for his answer. Touya noted that she had politely refrained from asking outright.

"There are certain, familial reasons," he left it vague. Akari allowed the silence to stretch as she considered the new pattern. "Obligations, tasks..." He did not want to tell her everything. He hoped this would be enough. She set a black stone on the grid; not the best move, but an acceptable one.

"If you need someone to mind your household, you could hire a maid or an assistant. If you need an heir, perhaps adopt one and retain a nanny. Hikaru's told me how traditional the Touya family is, but in this century, with your wealth, there are options that don't involve committing your heart somewhere it won't go. Unless," she eyed him with honest curiosity, "perhaps there is something I'm missing?"

He placed a stone, letting the silence stretch.

Across from him, Shindou Akari watched his eyes, then noted the stone. She ignored it.

"Oh well. I suppose your game is too deep for me. But since my husband doesn't seem to be understanding it either, I would ask that you please explain it to him some time. I don't like to see him as he is at the moment." She set her move down where he'd intended, and took another sip of tea.

"It's bothering him that much?" Touya said it before he realized he was speaking, oddly as though he had played a move intended by his opponent in this strange verbal game. He did not care for the sensation. To retract the question would give it more weight than it deserved, however. He sighed inwardly at his carelessness. Akari did not smile, but her face became considering.

"He took a trip to Hiroshima," she said, trusting her husband's rival to understand the significance if not the exact reason. Her trust was not misplaced. "He took Kinume with him. They have played every day since then. That's all I can say. Anything else, you'd have to ask him." She sighed. "He might even tell you, my foolish, stubborn husband, since it is inconvenient when best friends cease talking."

Touya had to admit there was some truth to her choice of nomenclature. They did not speak again for the remainder of the game. In the end, Akari lost, but didn't seem displeased with the outcome.

"Thank you for the game, Touya-sensei." Her professional, charming mask was firmly back in place.

"Thank you for the game, Akari-san." They cleared the board, and she stood, bowing slightly.

When she had gone, he stared at the empty board, considering. Five minutes later, he was at the counter, asking Ishikawa-san for his coat.

"I may not be in for a few days," he told her, fastening the zipper. She smiled and raised her eyebrows, but didn't question. Touya relented, appreciating his assistant's restraint enough to give her that much. "I'm going to visit my fiance."


	25. Understanding the Opponent

a/n: For the Dormouse's friend, whoever she may be.

**Part 25. Understanding the Opponent  
**

A weekend had turned into a week, and Touya had cancelled classes and matches alike to invest the time in his future wife. Sakamoto-san had been surprised but pleased when he called her cell to invite her for this impromptu meeting. She had then arranged time off with a speed that surprised her fiance, returning his call less than fifteen minutes later.

"There is an inn near Tennoji park that my coworker recommends, and I have booked you a room, if you'll pardon my presumption. I thought perhaps you might like to revisit the sites here?" Sakamoto-san had sounded happier than he had ever heard her. He'd toyed with the thought that perhaps she was finally free of familial influence. The difference was interesting.

"That sounds fine," he'd replied, taking down directions on a scrap of paper held against his steering wheel.

"This will be a lovely vacation for us both, Touya-san. We'll visit the castle and gardens and perhaps a museum? I will not think of files or cases at all, and you won't have to consider go and it will be perfectly relaxing..." She seemed to remember herself and her voice quieted. "Or I could arrange for you to meet with my extended family."

The thought of a week in which he did not "have to consider go" had been unsettling enough, without the added threat of meeting a horde of approving or at the very least nosy relatives. He'd tried to think of way to refuse such a meeting tactfully, but had finally given up.

"I'd rather just see you, Sakamoto-san. There are things we should discuss." He'd winced at how businesslike it sounded, but forced his hands not to clench on the wheel. This was more or less a business transaction, after all, and it wouldn't do any good to pretend otherwise. Simple politeness was the best choice, and clarity better than the circuity of traditional courtesies.

"Of course, Touya-san." Her voice had sounded politely cheerful - office appropriate even - and he remembered feeling relieved. Perhaps she understood.

---

Or perhaps not.

It was beginning to sink into Touya's mind that he was not always the best judge of his fellow man; particularly when that "man" was a woman. Sakamoto-san was beautiful, polite and witty. She had a broad knowledge of Osakan history and Japanese culture with an understanding of traditions that rivaled his own. Outside of the sheltering - which is to say stifling - observation of her relatives, the paralegal revealed a subtly humorous streak and a joie de vivre her fiance would never have suspected. While she did enjoy classical music, she confessed an unexpected fondness for jazz as well - playing endless selections from her collection in the CD player of his car. Even her dress was different - eschewing the suits and dresses that likely constituted her work attire for tastefully short skirts and stylish blouses.

They did go for walks in the artfully sculpted gardens of Osaka castle. They spent an entire afternoon viewing the tea bowls and sculptures in the nationally renowned ceramics museum. Their evenings had a decidedly younger feel to them, however, being filled with movies and trendy restaurants and once with miniature golf. Sakamoto-san was everything a traditional family could hope for within the walls of her home, but once let out, she was clearly a woman of the twenty-first century. She seemed to enjoy showing him around her city and its night life. But true to her word, she did not mention go even once.

It was a unique and highly enlightening week, but the absence of the reassuring familiarity of his favorite game was becoming increasingly impossible to ignore. He considered asking her to play - even an amateur could sometimes provide an entertaining game - but she did seem to be rather intently avoiding the subject and likely would simply refuse. Possibly she thought it was an old man's game. He was ten years her senior, after all. Probably she thought she was doing him a favor, keeping his thoughts off 'work' as she saw it.

Certainly she exhibited a very appropriately Japanese ability to segregate and subdivide the aspects of her own life. Her work as a paralegal in her father's firm had not been mentioned once. Neither had she spoken any more about her family than to answer any questions he posed; not that there had been many. They had discussed her education a little, comparing contrasted memories of very different childhoods. They had exchanged anecdotes of life and friends.

Sakamoto had quite a circle of the latter, and shared a number of colorful, happy memories. Touya found himself talking mostly about Kinume, his mother, and once or twice of Ishikawa - everyone else in his life was inseperable from the games he'd played against them. He considered telling her of Hikaru, whose antics certainly qualified as entertaining as often as not, but found every tale punctuated with go stones and ghosts in his mind. If Sakamoto's own life had such an overwhelming theme, he'd yet to discover it.

Would it be fair of him to drag such a multi-faceted woman into the one-sided obsession that characterized his life? They both enjoyed the tranquility of koi ponds and the beauty of traditional art, but it seemed a rather small point of agreement in the sea of differences. He wondered whether she would like Tokyo; whether she would be able to make new friends easily, when he knew of almost no one to whom he might introduce her. Would Sakamoto truly be able to establish the sort of comfortably separate existence his mother had seemed to have? He wondered whether Kinume was right about yose.

On this, the last evening of their "vacation of discovery," the betrothed pair had returned to Touya's suite and were sipping sake on the balcony, overlooking the city lights.

The pattern of lit windows and dark ones in one of the high rises reminded Touya of the last game he'd played against Shindou. In his mind, he could almost imagine the window on the third story, three places in, switching on to make the next move. Which of them would win, he wondered, if he could only reach out with his mind; if Shindou were waiting in that building? Would his rival even play? Touya's fingers moved on the armrest of his chair, unconsciously reaching for a go ke that was not there. The contact with fabric instead of stone brought his attention to the fact that the room was silent.

"I'm sorry, did you ask me something?" Sakamoto was looking at him strangely, head turned sideways to watch his profile instead of the view.

"It wasn't important," she answered, sipping delicately from her tiny sake cup. She had been talking and drinking fairly steadily, and had clearly had rather more than her host. The faint flush to her cheeks matched the demure shine in her dark eyes. "Akira-san, may I ask a personal question?"

He felt himself blush slightly at her tone and the use of his given name, but was at a loss to think up any good reason to refuse her. Instead, he nodded, before hiding behind his sake cup. It was empty, and he pantomimed the sip while she watched his lips. She set her own cup down, to lean closer.

"Do you find me attractive?" Her breath was warm against his cheek, the inches between them shrunk to little more than a hands breadth. Touya backed away slightly, to get a sufficient vantage from which to make an assessment, uncomfortably aware that that wasn't really what she was asking at all.

"You have a pleasant face, and an elegant figure," he offered, as both were certainly true. She frowned slightly, as though momentarily confused by what he hoped was a compliment, and Touya wondered whether he should telephone a taxi to take her home. "Your hair is quite nice," he added, watching the ebony wisps that had escaped their intricate arrangement to lie in artful contrast to the white of her neck. Then Sakamoto-san was smiling again, looking demurely away with a vulnerability almost more unsettling than her proximity.

"I'm glad. I've been hoping that you actually liked me, that perhaps our marriage could be for love instead of simply to please our parents." She reached out as though to steady herself, fingers coming to rest gently, deliberately, on his wrist. "I find _you_ very attractive, you see." She looked up into his eyes, almost imploring.

Her fiancé swallowed hard as his heart sped up with something unsettlingly like fear. He reminded himself that it was advantageous to be considered attractive by one's fiancé. He reminded himself that Sakamoto-san was slightly drunk, and in any case that she had been an enjoyable enough companion for the past week. He reminded himself that there was nothing at all un-natural about her wanting to touch the man she planned to marry, wanting him to tell her she was beautiful... He gently extricated his hand from hers, and stood.

"Shall I call for someone to take you home? I'm afraid I may have had too much to drive you myself," he explained, opening the glass door back into the hotel room. He turned to hear her answer, only to discover the woman herself standing inches away. For a moment, her eyes showed a mixture of shyness and determination and sake, and then her lips were pressed to his. She held the kiss a moment, then pulled away, searching his face for a reaction. He took a deep breath. "Sakamoto-san?"

"Akira..." Her face admonished him with a decisiveness he wished he could share.

"Haruki-san," he corrected. "Do you-?" She looked up, holding his gaze like a hard fought eyelet on the tengen.

"I would like to spend the night with you." Her cheeks colored, but her voice was calm, certain. While her resolve clearly had a good deal to do with sake, there was a sizeable portion of ernest feeling behind it. She waited for his answer.

A thousand possibilities spun through his head, but far too many of them were black and white, and no contest for the shades of grey this particular game required. He thought of excuses, but realized they were only that. And this was the woman he meant to make his wife. There were traditions he could point out. There were practicalities he could site. But in the end, she was an adult who knew what she wanted, and he owed it to her not to hide from the issue.

He lifted his arms to wrap her in an awkward embrace.

---

The voice on the other end of the line was muffled and confused, faint "hello," blurred under a weight of sleep. It was almost amazing he had answered at all, considering the time indicated by the lobby's clock.

"Shindou. I'd like to play a game." Surprisingly, his own voice sounded almost normal.

"Huh?" He could picture his rival sitting up slightly in bed, looking at his alarm clock, rubbing his eyes.

"A GAME, Shindou! You haven't come to the salon or met me in a match for a month. I want to play a game. Right NOW." And that time, his voice did not sound at all normal, but it was four o'clock in the morning and his world was turning inside out and his stomach felt queasy and his mind was spinning with worries and regrets and his heart... He didn't want to think about it. He wanted to play go, just go, against someone to whom that would be enough, say enough, not require explanations or apologies. He scowled into his phone. "Or have you finally decided to give up on the hand of God all together?" Which was unfair, but he could not allow Shindou to hang up.

"Touya?" The voice was a bit more concerned, "is that you?" Touya had almost decided on a response to yell when the voice continued, "Nevermind. Who else would it be?" There was a faint rustling. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. I just cannot tolerate the way you've been avoiding our practices and ignoring our study sessions. I'll take white. Play something." Admittedly, he didn't have a goban, but at the moment, the grid in his mind was crystal clear - the only thing that was, if truth be told. Shindou's groan sounded loud in the receiver.

"I'm not playing you over the phone at 4:17 a.m., Touya. That's the kind of crazy shit Kinume and Piotr do." In Osaka, the sleepless professional sat heavily on one of the lobby's plush armchairs, frustration at the refusal nearly overwhelming him. He needed a game. He had to have one, before the rest of his life fell apart. He opened his mouth, but was once again cut off.

"If you really want to play me, come over."

"I'm in Osaka," he whispered, not trusting his voice for anything else.

"Then you'd better start driving," Shindou answered. It was not a request, but it was precisely the sort of demand Touya would accept only from his rival. That fact alone anchored his jumbled thoughts, and he nodded, forgetting Shindou couldn't see. "You still there?"

"I'm leaving now, and you had better be ready to play when I arrive." His voice was challenging and rude, but he heard the familiar snort in response.

"You're the one who had better be ready," Shindou answered, boldly. Then his voice softened a little, and the strange intuition that Touya had learned to respect on the goban colored his rival's voice. "And hey, if you want to talk on your way over, that would be okay too," a pause, "are you sure you're all right?"

"I'll be there in six hours," he replied, then hung up. He visited the front desk to make a few arrangements, then went back upstairs to retrieve his things. Minutes later, in the car, his shoulders relaxed for the first time all week.


End file.
